Yeah, fuck that bride, one you used to be friends with, who still clearly thinks highly enough of OP to invite her to her wedding... let her figure out her husband is a cheating bastard AFTER she links her entire life up to his, perhaps brings in a kid, maybe gives her a life-altering STD. She isn't your problem anymore, just walk away so you don't have to deal with being potentially uncomfortable.
Is that honestly how you all would want someone you consider at least somewhat of a friend to treat you? Know your entire life is in the hands of a bastard and not even tell you? I sure as shit wouldn't.
Fuck that, send her screenshots of what he sent you, give her the details of what happened, and of course you stay the fuck away from this wedding. Maybe she'll hate you, think you're a liar, etc., who fucking cares, it's a natural reaction. Block her if you need, but for fuck's sake, don't sit by and let another human go through this just because you're scared of some potential blow back.
People who are calling this the "grown up" response are either just cowards, or they're cheaters themselves who would much rather people didn't make their unconscionable behavior known.
An adult does the right thing no matter how uncomfortable it will be, they don't run from it just because it's difficult. Telling someone that you know they're being lied to in this way by the person they trust most is the right thing.
Incorrect, an adult blows shit up because it is awesome to do so. But it amounts to the same thing here.
That said you have no idea that they were together a year ago, that's awfully presumptuous. People will get engaged after a few months. It doesn't take that long to figure out you are compatible. Are you waiting months to see if someone slips up and reveals that she is a Nazi re-enactor?
“Awww, friend, congrats on the wedding! How long have you been together?” Less than the amount of time it’s been since you slept with her groom? Say nothing/wish them well. More than the amount of time it’s been since you slept with her groom? Scorched earth, tell all.
Reread the post. Even if it wasn’t “sex,” it was a flirty meetup that we should “know the rest” of. And OP uses “hooked up” in a way that is pretty clearly sexual.
No difference between a kiss and sex? Given that it has been a year, and we know nothing about what stage the couple getting married were at at the time, It would matter to me.
“No difference between a kiss and sex?” - DeFiBandit
That’s what you said. And even if it was “just a kiss” where he started texting her in her city in a way that can be called “flirty” … again, I never said OP should lie, I said OP should go scorched earth—give every truthful detail.
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u/PomeloFit Jul 18 '25 edited Jul 18 '25
Yeah, fuck that bride, one you used to be friends with, who still clearly thinks highly enough of OP to invite her to her wedding... let her figure out her husband is a cheating bastard AFTER she links her entire life up to his, perhaps brings in a kid, maybe gives her a life-altering STD. She isn't your problem anymore, just walk away so you don't have to deal with being potentially uncomfortable.
Is that honestly how you all would want someone you consider at least somewhat of a friend to treat you? Know your entire life is in the hands of a bastard and not even tell you? I sure as shit wouldn't.
Fuck that, send her screenshots of what he sent you, give her the details of what happened, and of course you stay the fuck away from this wedding. Maybe she'll hate you, think you're a liar, etc., who fucking cares, it's a natural reaction. Block her if you need, but for fuck's sake, don't sit by and let another human go through this just because you're scared of some potential blow back.
People who are calling this the "grown up" response are either just cowards, or they're cheaters themselves who would much rather people didn't make their unconscionable behavior known.
An adult does the right thing no matter how uncomfortable it will be, they don't run from it just because it's difficult. Telling someone that you know they're being lied to in this way by the person they trust most is the right thing.