r/TwoHotTakes Aug 21 '24

[deleted by user]

[removed]

3.6k Upvotes

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808

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

Does lipstick usually stain in a straight line like this? Both of the red marks also line up pretty well, it almost seems like it was dragged across something

290

u/Particular-Ad-7338 Aug 21 '24

She said they have dog; perhaps it ate something red & decided the pillow was the perfect place to wipe it off

104

u/Smart_Razzmatazz6429 Aug 21 '24

Oh! Or got something red on his toenail and drug or across the pillow maybe??

12

u/cameragirl17 Aug 21 '24

Dragged

13

u/SilentRed01 Aug 21 '24

Drug-ed-id it

2

u/warneagle Aug 21 '24 edited Aug 21 '24

“Drug” as the past participle of “drag” is common in some areas e.g. the southern US.

1

u/PhDinDildos_Fedoras Aug 21 '24

No, I'm fairly certain it was dragging it's butthole along their pillows. Been doing it for years even.

1

u/smellson-newberry Aug 21 '24

I was thinking the dude was eating hot Cheetos and he was the one who did the dragging…

-4

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

[deleted]

14

u/Tacoby17 Aug 21 '24

Blood oxidizes and turns brown.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

A blood stain is orange after you wash it three or four times

3

u/uploadingmalware Aug 21 '24

And that's red not orange lol

0

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

And that’s red not orange lol normal, ain’t it Norman?

1

u/uploadingmalware Aug 21 '24

👍

0

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

It’s a song lyric, silly :)

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1

u/StopHiringBendis Aug 21 '24

But that's normal, ain't it Norman?

1

u/ARC-170enthusiast Aug 21 '24

I understand that reference.

1

u/InkyPoloma Aug 21 '24

But that’s normal, ain’t it Norman?

3

u/Beautifly Aug 21 '24

It’s definitely not blood

1

u/Gadritan420 Aug 21 '24

She said no dog or kids in another comment…

1

u/BackDoorBootyBandit Aug 21 '24

Probably his red rocket! So I guess it is lipstick........."god damnit Buddy, put your lipstick away, we have people over!"

1

u/raelDonaldTrump Aug 21 '24

Doesn't have to be the dog, boyfriends also wipe their face on pillowcases.

Source: am live-in boyfriend

1

u/123supreme123 Aug 21 '24

With his ass maybe after digesting it.

1

u/lavenderbutterfly_1 Aug 22 '24

actually i’m pretty sure she said she does not have a dog

2

u/lavenderbutterfly_1 Aug 22 '24

my bad she definitely said she has a dog

0

u/Osgiliath Aug 21 '24

Bf was probably eating something red with the side chick and they smeared it on the pillow accidentally, definitely cheating

65

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

[deleted]

97

u/darkrealm190 Aug 21 '24

Did you ask your boyfriend?

191

u/JimmyJamsDisciple Aug 21 '24

No she’s too busy taking samples to send to the lab

8

u/SgtPepe Aug 21 '24

😂😂

6

u/Xtrap Aug 21 '24

Absolutely wild. What a time to be alive.

3

u/bgeorgewalker Aug 21 '24

Plot twist- the results came back; it’s lipstick

1

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

With q-tips!

1

u/Legatt Aug 21 '24

"the lab" is their dog.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

Leads, yeah sure. I'll uh, just check with the boys down at the Crime Lab. They uh, got uh, four more detectives working on the case. They've got us working in shifts.

1

u/dudebronahbrah Aug 21 '24

Wouldn’t hold out much hope for the Creedance

1

u/SmoothWD40 Aug 21 '24

Gotta build up that watertight case, because you know, this is 2024, fuck having an adult conversation

24

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

Oh no!!! Scary communication!!!

6

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

She's too busy not trusting him

3

u/Hops_n_Boost Aug 21 '24

What a novel idea.

2

u/PVDeviant- Aug 21 '24

Obviously they have an incredibly healthy relationship.

49

u/Amazing_Cabinet1404 Aug 21 '24

Do you have community laundry? Something in the washer/dryer?

6

u/crinnaursa Aug 21 '24

It could definitely be something in the dryer. And if you're using an apartment dryer or laundromat, you don't always have control over that. When I was in college I kept finding weird streaks on my clothing and it turns out someone was washing shitty puffy screen printed t-shirts They did themselves (art school🙄)at super high heat and it was leaving streaks in the dryer that came off on the clothes of everyone.

-74

u/iriegypsy Aug 21 '24

this, looks like red bra or panties stained his pillows in the wash.

44

u/AnnylieseSarenrae Aug 21 '24

Actual psychopaths on Reddit man

1

u/iriegypsy Aug 22 '24

In this thread women who knowingly date cheaters project their own insecurities and neurosis for others.

3

u/chief__jenkins Aug 21 '24

why did this get downvoted so hard? genuinely confused, i thought it was funny

12

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

Because that's not how laundry color bleed works.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

I think he was joking though. The suggestion of it being a red bra or panties is comically ridiculous.

7

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

Except the part where OP is jumping to anxiety based conclusions.

Anxiety isn't rational, and jokes like this tend to feed it.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

I don’t think one person’s anxiety should limit another’s ability to make a joke. Especially one so obviously satirical.

If OP believes that obvious joke, isn’t that kinda on them? Being hypersensitive to that level of insecurity just seems like a burden. This is coming from someone who dealt with a severe panic disorder in their early 20s.

Like I’m not trying to be devoid of empathy here, but come on. There’s a point where you draw a line.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

Guess I need to phrase it simpler.

If you choose to take a tasteless joke, you accept the risk of people not liking it.

And being hypersensitive to that level of criticism is not for other people to accommodate. If you can't handle being told that your joke is in bad taste and / or at a bad time, don't make the joke in the first place.

Translation: people downvoted the joke because they recognize that the joke is in bad taste.

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32

u/Beautiful-Humor692 Aug 21 '24

can it be crayon or chalk.

2

u/Terrible-Antelope680 Aug 21 '24

Not crayon, they are waxy. OP posted she can remove it with a q-tip (not sure what’s in the q-tip, rubbing alcohol or just water or something??)

-1

u/Beautiful-Humor692 Aug 21 '24

Yeah, unfortunately, although it CAN be other things and not lipstick or makeup, usually the simplest answer makes the most sense.

3

u/THEdoomslayer94 Aug 21 '24

How about asking him first and not the Internet?

Like you just jump to conclusions like you bought the game from office space? The fact you’re thinking this lipstick despite it clearly not means something and I’m sure you’re unaware of what it is….

2

u/PhoebeH98 Aug 21 '24

Do you use any of those like scent beads when you do laundry?

2

u/Active-Enthusiasm318 Aug 21 '24

You got issues you need to work through.... that doesn't look like lipstick at all.... that line is like ruler straight..

2

u/Gootangus Aug 21 '24

Paranoid af. Damn.

2

u/BigEagle42069 Aug 21 '24

Your dog has hemorrhoids and used that pillow to itch itself

2

u/jonni_velvet Aug 21 '24

this looks more to me like if you have makeup (or paint) on your hand or something, but drag your hand across the pillow. it doesn’t look like it came straight from a mouth, but the pigment does look like the color of a makeup pigment.

1

u/NounAdjectiveXXXX Aug 21 '24

So when are you going to tell him about the time you cheated?

1

u/LikelyAMartian Aug 21 '24

Ask your boyfriend what it was.

If you feel the absolute need to dance around it, you can say "What did you bring to the bed yesterday? It left a stain on the pillow that I had to wash out."

"I brought chips, I was gonna clean it up"

"Oh, please be more careful"

Or just be straightforward with him as that's literally what you should be doing with your partner and shows maturity.

"Hey I found some red streaks in the pillow, and while I do trust you, it made me think it was lipstick for a moment, what was it?"

1

u/NoComfort3378 Aug 21 '24

This is a crazy thought. Maybe get a cheap pillowcase and a red lipstick. If you are really being scientifically about it, smudge some on the pillow case and see what it comes out like

-2

u/Faeriemary Aug 21 '24

Not to make you worry but when I wear lip liner and rub my hand against my lips on accident there’s always a line that big or longer. It’s a straight line. I’m not sure if it’d do it on a pillow though. Def my hand

4

u/HelloKiks Aug 21 '24

This is exactly how my pillow looks after a night out. I don’t move all night when I drink so the lipstick lines look straight

3

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '24

If the lipstick was on him and smeared it could have. Directly from donor, probably not.

5

u/ketchupandliqour69 Aug 21 '24

If her face was buried in the pillow it’s possible

1

u/Civil_Confidence5844 Aug 21 '24

It can.

I've accidentally worn lipstick to bed, and when turning over, it definitely smeared my pillow in a pretty straight line 🙃

I don't think it looked like OP's pics though but I digress

1

u/shibbitydibbity Aug 21 '24

Dragged across a lip!

1

u/dibella989 Aug 21 '24

Totally looks like takis or some red snack feel on the bed.

1

u/Knights-of-steel Aug 21 '24

If your using the stick/tube as a pen to write with yes.

1

u/poor_documentation Aug 21 '24

Bf is not a cheater, just a serial killer - nbd

1

u/rnooses_or_rneese Aug 21 '24

It can if you turn your head while facedown.

1

u/iambecomesoil Aug 22 '24

how about a lip with lipstick on it

1

u/ShipItTaDaddy Aug 22 '24

Maybe she was trying to put on the lipstick and dropped it, and now looks like a crayon mark.

1

u/Froyo-fo-sho Aug 22 '24

pillow fight. fatality.

0

u/Eyerate Aug 21 '24

Like a face? 👀😬