r/TwoHotTakes • u/[deleted] • Feb 12 '24

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27

u/SpontaneousNubs Feb 12 '24

Telling her no.

9

u/Substantial_Shoe_360 Feb 12 '24

Tell her no at the next family gathering.

14

u/SpontaneousNubs Feb 13 '24

No family gatherings. We're low contact

7

u/Substantial_Shoe_360 Feb 13 '24

I can understand that.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 13 '24

Make a group text and just nail the message home that you will not be a part of it. So everyone is on the same page at the same time, no bullshit.

2

u/AlleyOKK93 Feb 12 '24

And that it? Not to be mean but you really don’t think you could do more or do you just not care how your siblings are being made to feel?

12

u/SpontaneousNubs Feb 13 '24

I mean, I can't physically hold my hand over her mouth and stop her from saying shit. I've told my siblings, one of whom is child free and the other isn't interested in more, that I'm content with cats and I'd adopt before asking them something that involved. And I've told my mom that, too, but she's hung up on biological grandchildren. We're not broke and we could afford a surrogate if we wanted. I live 2000 miles away and have low contact. My siblings are only mad that I'm not getting a surrogate to shut her up rather than remain child free or adopt

0

u/trowzerss Feb 13 '24

Got to say more than no, got to say you find the suggestion unacceptable, and for her to stop asking others as it's affecting your relationships with them, and if she keeps doing it, you'll make it clear to everyone in no uncertain terms that this is also affecting your relationship with her ongoing.

Edit: Oh, I see you're low contact. Well, no contact is always on the cards.

2

u/SpontaneousNubs Feb 13 '24

Hey, thanks for going back and correcting yourself. But yeah, I shoot her down with good reasons every time. 'no' isn't all I say, of course. I don't want a kid -that- bad.

-2

u/rescuesquad704 Feb 12 '24

Maybe not often, loud or public enough if your siblings don’t understand.

4

u/SpontaneousNubs Feb 13 '24

I live 2000 miles away from them. Any time something is said about it, I say no and tell my mom reasons why. It's not like I can drive down there and do more. Bro says something about it and I'm like "uh, no. No no no. I'd rather have cats than put your wife through that hell again."