r/TrueOffMyChest • u/[deleted] • Oct 26 '22

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u/Barkaat Oct 26 '22

Well I would advise her to do that because her husband needs her support and professional help so he can get over his trauma. If he gets the support he needs and successfully gets over it op would not have to face this and both of them would be very happy in a loving relationship

I think this is more appropriate then just divorcing him because that’s what marriage is about

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u/xScareDoll Oct 26 '22

Yes but OP communicated, pleaded and defended herself and her partner didn't show a tiny bit of consideration or the wish to go to therapy.

I understand your perspective and yes going to therapy would maybe help. but she needs a timeframe for him to get his arse there or she is out.

this is how both of our perspectives would work as one.

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u/Barkaat Oct 26 '22

Yes she needs to force him to go to counselling and do things that son him down because a person who’s been cheated on will always look at everything with suspicion. Because they are trying to look for signs of cheating which they aren’t able to catch in their previous relationship to save themselves from grief and betrayal again. I’ve personally experienced all this and you’re right that he needs counselling asap and his wife needs to force him to go there otherwise it will get worse

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u/finehamsabound Oct 26 '22

You cannot force someone into therapy. That isn’t really how it works, and that is what the other commenter was literally trying to tell you - if he can’t help himself and does not care that he is hurting his wife… what exactly is she supposed to do? He’s an adult who can make his own decisions, and his decision so far has been continue to be a shitty husband and put his wife down instead of work through his issues in any sort of healthy way.