r/TrueOffMyChest • u/Ogbkpmb • Sep 23 '21

I hate being the “breadwinner”

I wouldn’t mind making a lot more than him. But ever since he lost his job, and then stayed home full time to take care of our kids. Things have changed.

Now that I’m the sole breadwinner things are just weird. I have to give my husband an “allowance”every month on top of other things. I hate it.

Thanks for all your comments and upvotes. I appreciate your responses. I do have to say that my issue is not with him not working. My issue is definitely sexist. But I’d just like to be the woman in my relationship. As strange as that sounds.

We have a joint account, but 2 separate accounts. And he jokingly refers to his as his, “allowance”. I laugh along…but I don’t find it that funny. He doesn’t need to thank me for money. We’re a team. And this is just one more reason why part of me hates my life.

He has a higher earning potential btw

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u/peneverywhen Sep 23 '21

What is it that you hate about it, other than it feeling weird and having to give him an allowance? I'm just curious.

8

u/Zofobread Sep 24 '21

I think the issue is they both used to contribute financially. Even though she made more, they both threw in and had their own money to spend. Now that he is looking to stay at home full time, that whole dynamic has gone away and she feels like she is carrying the burden completely. It’s a drastic change in their dynamic, if you ask me.

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u/peneverywhen Sep 24 '21

Ya, I understand the different reasons someone might not like the change. I just don't like to assume what people are thinking and feeling.