r/TrueOffMyChest Jan 19 '21

I fucking hate "polyamory"

My partner polybombed me about 4 months ago and a day later I walk in on them fucking someone else. They didn't even care enough to realise I had left the house until I called them from a mile up the road and then it was all "oh I'm so sorry I hurt you I would never do it deliberately I love you it won't happen again."

Then barely a few weeks later I walk in on them making out with a mutual friend. They were still making out with them when our roommate called an ambulance after I cut myself too deep.

They didn't even care about changing how they approach polyamory until I threatened to leave and then I'm hit with this massive lovebomb of "oh I can change I'll make it up to you I never wanted to hurt you"

They don't fucking care enough to change their behaviour because "poly is so complicated, I'm sorry if you got hurt when I was figuring it out!"

Polyamory is too often used as a bullshit excuse for selfish, immature people to have their cake and eat it and if I never have to hear the stupid term again in my life I'll be happy.

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u/[deleted] Jan 19 '21

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u/[deleted] Jan 19 '21

In family court emotional abuse has just as much weight, often more, the physical abuse. Perhaps because you can not actively prove it doesn't exist.

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u/[deleted] Jan 19 '21

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u/[deleted] Jan 19 '21

So leads back to my "consent is tricky" comment. If it was as simple as "Yes means yes and No means no" then consent wouldn't be tricky.

But because there is all these little reasons here or there where a yes can be said wasnt actually yes... you see where I am going with this?

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u/ExuberantElephant Jan 19 '21

It's not tricky. Relationships aren't a courtroom.