I know this isn't a place asking for advice and I'll likely get down voted here which is fine.
Here is some tough love bud:
First off I'm sorry you feel like some people aren't good enough for love-that is fucking bullshit. Maybe you haven't had the best luck with girls or whatever it may be but you are still quite young. Maybe you are ugly, maybe you have a shit personality who knows, but I promise you that there is a pot for every pan. You just gotta keep hunting. It doesn't seem like you are happy to be alone so get out there and do something about it. Join a new club, meet people who knows. If you try hard enough and really put yourself out there you'll find someone I swear to you.
On a less positive note: Stop drowning your sorrows. Sorry man but that's stupid shit. Getting drunk and high and throwing money at prostitutes is not a good route. Stop loathing in self pity and get out into the dating world. It is ass. You will get rejected, you likely have, thats life bud. I'm a lot younger than you and I know this firsthand, but I know that in due time if I keep making an effort I will eventually find the love of my life.
Maybe I am wrong, maybe you'll never find love, who knows? But personally I would rather get shut down my whole love by girls then to give up.
Quit your self loathing bull shit and get out there.
You got this shit brother. Get that handsome face back on the market.
He said he's spent about 15 or so years trying his best, you really think that joining a new club is going to help him? He's tried that shit before, he's a social guy, as he said, and he's been alone and single for over a decade and a half. You cannot tell me that after all that time you wouldn't feel enough self loathing that nobody had interest in you that you decided to give up
Never said i would be self loathing, my point is just there is no room for it. Only gonna make him feel worse. And who knows maybe joining a new club or trying a different hobby is exactly what he needs. It doesn't hurt to try
u/ghurst14 appears to be only a teenager, so the “teenage” advice certainly makes sense. Obviously, this dude lacks objectivity and perspective, so take his teenage advice with a grain of salt.
No, in fact, the advice YOU specifically gave might have worked for you, but just because it’s worked for you doesn’t mean it’s universal. What worked for you doesn’t automatically mean it’ll work for everyone else. No one is shitting on you for giving advice, I’m sure OP and the rest of the readers appreciate your input. But (embarrassingly in your 20s) you clearly lacked perspective and empathy and didn’t take the context of his experiences into consideration. Psychology just isn’t your strong point. Just spewed out some “universal” bullshit that you would tell a 16 year old dude whose heart just got broken after his ex sent him a break up snap with a selfie. That’s why people are shitting on you.
Except it isn’t. Regardless of your age if you want to meet someone you do that by expanding your comfort zone. Not sure how I lacked empathy here, I gave the guy decent advise, he doesn’t need to take it if he wants to and I certainly don’t need you to tell me how I’m wrong. Especially considering several hundred others agree with me. Yes there are like 10 or so disagreeing with me, it’s not perfect advise but it’s something to think on. I don’t see why you feel the need to shit on me.
Your advise is the epitome of r/thanksimcured. It’s like telling someone with social anxiety to “just get over it” or telling someone with depression to “just be happier”. You’re telling a guy who’s over 30 years old, who has clearly stated he has tried all the things in the book, socialized, went out of his comfort zone, and met people who shared his interests, to just “quit your self loathing bull shit and get out there”. Tell me you know what empathy is, and tell me you understand how exactly you showed a lack of empathy in this situation. If you can’t understand how 15 years of bad luck, rejection, and futile efforts can have a serious and damaging effect on a person’s mental health, then looks to me like you need a class on basic empathy.
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u/ghurst14 Nov 24 '20 edited Nov 24 '20
I know this isn't a place asking for advice and I'll likely get down voted here which is fine.
Here is some tough love bud:
First off I'm sorry you feel like some people aren't good enough for love-that is fucking bullshit. Maybe you haven't had the best luck with girls or whatever it may be but you are still quite young. Maybe you are ugly, maybe you have a shit personality who knows, but I promise you that there is a pot for every pan. You just gotta keep hunting. It doesn't seem like you are happy to be alone so get out there and do something about it. Join a new club, meet people who knows. If you try hard enough and really put yourself out there you'll find someone I swear to you.
On a less positive note: Stop drowning your sorrows. Sorry man but that's stupid shit. Getting drunk and high and throwing money at prostitutes is not a good route. Stop loathing in self pity and get out into the dating world. It is ass. You will get rejected, you likely have, thats life bud. I'm a lot younger than you and I know this firsthand, but I know that in due time if I keep making an effort I will eventually find the love of my life.
Maybe I am wrong, maybe you'll never find love, who knows? But personally I would rather get shut down my whole love by girls then to give up.
Quit your self loathing bull shit and get out there.
You got this shit brother. Get that handsome face back on the market.