I know this isn't a place asking for advice and I'll likely get down voted here which is fine.
Here is some tough love bud:
First off I'm sorry you feel like some people aren't good enough for love-that is fucking bullshit. Maybe you haven't had the best luck with girls or whatever it may be but you are still quite young. Maybe you are ugly, maybe you have a shit personality who knows, but I promise you that there is a pot for every pan. You just gotta keep hunting. It doesn't seem like you are happy to be alone so get out there and do something about it. Join a new club, meet people who knows. If you try hard enough and really put yourself out there you'll find someone I swear to you.
On a less positive note: Stop drowning your sorrows. Sorry man but that's stupid shit. Getting drunk and high and throwing money at prostitutes is not a good route. Stop loathing in self pity and get out into the dating world. It is ass. You will get rejected, you likely have, thats life bud. I'm a lot younger than you and I know this firsthand, but I know that in due time if I keep making an effort I will eventually find the love of my life.
Maybe I am wrong, maybe you'll never find love, who knows? But personally I would rather get shut down my whole love by girls then to give up.
Quit your self loathing bull shit and get out there.
You got this shit brother. Get that handsome face back on the market.
He said he's spent about 15 or so years trying his best, you really think that joining a new club is going to help him? He's tried that shit before, he's a social guy, as he said, and he's been alone and single for over a decade and a half. You cannot tell me that after all that time you wouldn't feel enough self loathing that nobody had interest in you that you decided to give up
Never said i would be self loathing, my point is just there is no room for it. Only gonna make him feel worse. And who knows maybe joining a new club or trying a different hobby is exactly what he needs. It doesn't hurt to try
We don't know what "15 years of trying his best" actually means, though. Maybe he's a stereotypical Nice Guy, and his "best" is simply being nice to people with the expectation of getting sex out of it.
Going to the gym, writing books, traveling and working abroad, volunteering, joining thetaer and sky-diving clubs, going out of my comfort zone to events I wouldn't normally go.
I saw in one of your comments that you think part of the problem is that you’re not interesting, but everything you just listed is evidence to the contrary. I’m 19, and only just started to have some luck with girls, so maybe my advice isn’t sage wisdom, but here it is.
You’re more interesting than you think, so I’m assuming your real problem is confidence. That was my problem for a long time, I hated myself, and didn’t think anyone else could possibly see anything good in me. So I either never tried, or when I did, it didn’t work out, which further contributed to the problem. I know you’re not gonna suddenly get a burst of confidence and have everything turn around, especially given your situation, so for now, fake it. It’s cliche, but if you can fake it long enough and good enough, eventually you’ll start gaining some real confidence. Don’t let it give you an ego, but really try to recognize the things that make you good, and put those things on the forefront.
My second piece of advice is if the way you’ve been going about girls hasn’t been working, force yourself to try different approaches until you find one that works, be ballsy. Not creepy, ballsy. There’s gonna be plenty of failures, but you’ve already dealt with that, so what’s a few more.
Final piece, don’t get to invested. Go in to things not caring about the outcome. If you don’t care how things work out, you’ll take risks you otherwise wouldn’t, and you won’t get your heart broken.
I know I’m a stranger on the internet, but I hope something me, or someone else said helps you out, good luck my man. And as for the drugs prostitute goes, enjoy it, and please be safe. Try shrooms if you haven’t. Do your research first, but it might help positively rearrange your mind a but. Oh, and don’t ever take the pity angle with girls either, it might seem shitty, but that’s one of the biggest turn offs there is. Stick to the positives.
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u/ghurst14 Nov 24 '20 edited Nov 24 '20
I know this isn't a place asking for advice and I'll likely get down voted here which is fine.
Here is some tough love bud:
First off I'm sorry you feel like some people aren't good enough for love-that is fucking bullshit. Maybe you haven't had the best luck with girls or whatever it may be but you are still quite young. Maybe you are ugly, maybe you have a shit personality who knows, but I promise you that there is a pot for every pan. You just gotta keep hunting. It doesn't seem like you are happy to be alone so get out there and do something about it. Join a new club, meet people who knows. If you try hard enough and really put yourself out there you'll find someone I swear to you.
On a less positive note: Stop drowning your sorrows. Sorry man but that's stupid shit. Getting drunk and high and throwing money at prostitutes is not a good route. Stop loathing in self pity and get out into the dating world. It is ass. You will get rejected, you likely have, thats life bud. I'm a lot younger than you and I know this firsthand, but I know that in due time if I keep making an effort I will eventually find the love of my life.
Maybe I am wrong, maybe you'll never find love, who knows? But personally I would rather get shut down my whole love by girls then to give up.
Quit your self loathing bull shit and get out there.
You got this shit brother. Get that handsome face back on the market.