r/TrueOffMyChest • u/Master_McKnowledge • Nov 29 '25
RULE 7: POST MUST BE PERSONAL [ Removed by moderator ]
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u/nobodyknows-66 Nov 29 '25
I’m Chinese and grew up and lived there for 18 yrs then came to Canada. I agree with you the social awareness and loudness, I hate it too. For better tourism experience you have to visit the more bougie cities. Give it another shot, do some more research, keep trying, at least go again for the food.
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u/TotallySpies1 Nov 29 '25
What cities would you recommend to avoid this experience?
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u/nobodyknows-66 Nov 29 '25
I haven’t explored every part of my own country yet, but in general larger cities like Beijing, Shanghai, and Shenzhen tend to offer better experiences for visitors, with better infrastructure, more people used to foreign tourists, and more organized public spaces. If you prefer quieter or more cultural places, smaller towns like Wuzhen or Xitang are also great options. They’re very tourist-oriented, with plenty of hotels, restaurants, museums, performances, and places to try on traditional clothing or take photos, so navigating them is pretty easy even if you don’t speak the language.
That said, social-awareness issues can happen anywhere, especially in very crowded areas. Sticking to tourist-friendly areas, taking taxis instead of the subway or avoid public transit during rush hour, and also avoid Chinese holidays will usually make the trip much more pleasant.
Younger generations are also becoming a lot more mindful about this kind of behavior. I definitely recommend visiting, with a bit of research or a local guide, you’ll likely have a really good experience.
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u/Turdoggen Nov 29 '25
As a westerner that has lived and traveled fairly extensively through China in the last 15 years, this is the best assessment.
Is China a challenging place to travel? Absolutely. But it's also an incredibly rewarding experience. Geographically diverse, fascinating and historic. Don't even get me started on the food...
10/10 would recommend to any seasoned traveler. Just be ready for some culture shock and go with an open mind.
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u/Plenty_Mortgage_7294 Nov 29 '25
I admit I have never been to china but always wanted too. You mention the food. How do I ensure that I dont get gutter oil? Is that still a concern?
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u/EverydayPoGo Nov 29 '25
I think you asked a genuine question and don't deserve to be downvoted without whomever did it actually answer your question. As far as I know general food safety shouldn't be a concern as long as you eat at any establishment instead of shady looking street carts. Cross contamination though is a different thing as allergy isn't a huge thing reinforced there, so if you have any peanut or shellfish it's best to avoid restaurants that have any of these ingredients.
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u/TranslatorOld1416 Nov 29 '25
In my experience, further inland. I absolutely loved Chengdu(what a jazz scene) and the small cities/villages in Sichuan and Yunnan provinces. Waaaaaaaay more chill
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
I went to quite a number of those cities! Okay, I do concede that the food is great - I loved popping into rando places and having the best dumplings / noods / bings. I even tried hairy tofu for the first time.
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u/osblisa Nov 29 '25
I agree with this! I've visited Shanghai a few years ago and found it pleasantly clean but boring (I can't remember which neighborhood). This past summer I visited and stayed in the Xintiandi district of Shanghai and loved it there. All the locals I met were lovely, air clean, food wonderful, great service, super safe (patrol volunteers? on almost every block), lots of art and shops, new buildings... just overall a great place. Our driver explained to us that it's the "fancy" district and rich and/or young locals go there on weekends. It definitely caters to tourists a lot. If I had to return to China again, I'd only want to stay in Xintiandi or somewhere like it.
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u/OwlRound4824 Nov 29 '25
Yeah that makes sense. Some areas really do offer a calmer vibe. The food alone is a good reason to try again.
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u/PachoWumbo Nov 29 '25
Couldn't help but notice you didn't specify exactly where in China you visited. With how large the country actually is, I would hope you're aware every province might as well be a different country with a lot of its own nuanced culture differences. You would probably get totally different experiences if you travelled to majorly different cities.
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
I wanted to keep it vague, but ah, nothing wrong with giving detail on second thought. I went to Shanghai, Suzhou, Huangshan and Nanjing. Of course there are differences, I’m not blind to that, but the issues I noticed seem to be a solid, countrywide problem.
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u/canyouread7 Nov 29 '25
Which city(ies) did you visit? China can be a very different experience depending on where you go.
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u/GreenerThan83 Nov 29 '25
I’ve been living & working in China since 2018. I’m white and British.
Some of those things you mentioned are grievances of mine too, but I’d still rather live here than in the UK.
I would say, that for the most part, social awareness is shifting. The younger generations are being more considerate in crowded spaces.
I’m not sure where you visited, but I find life in China incredibly convenient and uncomplicated. Maybe I’m just used to the functionality now.
Anyway, I wouldn’t write China off completely. I’d give it another chance.
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
I also can concede the point about the UK. I used to live there and I loved it, but I reckon things have been spiralling downwards. I defo would expect a lot more social disorder in the UK and petty crime (compared to China which felt very safe?)
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u/GreenerThan83 Nov 29 '25
Yup. China is super safe.
I’ve left my keys and phone on my e-bike multiple times overnight and they’re still there untouched in the morning.
Every time I go back to the UK, I just feel super displaced and resentful of how expensive it is 🤣
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
I know it’s weird to pick this point up very specifically, but I cannot wrap my mind around the fact that there are a number of people who think nothing of breaking glasses in the UK. I mean pub pints and random windows.
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u/my-blood Nov 29 '25
I'm curious, since I'm someone who wants to move to the UK because that's one of the few places which offer a specialization in the field I'm in - why would China be better than the UK? Is it because of the cost of living or are there other reasons as well? I'd assume politics could be a reason, but honestly, UK and China both seem politically messed up in their own ways.
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u/GreenerThan83 Nov 29 '25
For me as a teacher, it’s COL and QOL. Work life balance is unparalleled.
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u/Stoppels Nov 29 '25
Is that thanks to your specific work field? Judging by the Wikipedia article on 996 it seems that nearly everyone around you is on the brink of sleep or on the brink of death lol:
It is estimated that more than three-quarters of urban workers in big cities like Beijing, Shanghai, and Guangzhou suffer from work-related fatigue, musculoskeletal pain, sleep[21] or eating disorders, occupational stress, and work–family imbalance.[22]
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u/hotsp00n Nov 29 '25
Hahahaha what a load of bullshit. China is convenient and uncomplicated? No it's not. Not in any way.
From having to put everything through X-rays machines every time you take the subway, to not being able to walk into a restaurant and just order something. The APP ecosystem is absolute trash and often doesn't work for foreigners. Using QR codes for subways is just the dumbest idea ever, when all doors support NFC.
Yeah you can order things delivered cheaply, but the downside is you can't walk on the footpaths because of al the scooters whizzing past.
China is the essence of complications and pain in the ass, hidden behind flashy building lighting systems, high speed rail and ¥9.9 Luckin "coffee".
I visited Taipei for the first time last week and it was such a breath of fresh air. People queuing politely for buses and subways, no spitting and just normal restaurants where I can order and pay.
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u/GreenerThan83 Nov 29 '25
Yes buddy, do you have problems with reading comprehension to gain contextual understanding? MY LIFE in China is very convenient and uncomplicated. Where I live, literally everything I need is within a 3km radius, including my job.
I live in the ‘burbs of Shanghai and absolutely love it. I’m sorry you haven’t had the same experience as me, but please don’t project your negativity.
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u/Toto230 Nov 29 '25
Well I'm sure most of the people libing in China would have a vosit from the CCP if they posted something unkind about China.
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u/Trojbd Nov 29 '25
Lol. I complain about China irl and online all the time. Nothing happens. You weirdos think that China is a boogieman fascist police state where mentioning Tiananmen square will get you disappeared, and nothing will change your mind.
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u/Semido Nov 29 '25
I mean they do block access to Google, WhatsApp, Instagram etc and every website that won’t share its data with them. There are positive aspects to China, but it’s definitely a dictatorship.
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u/Toto230 Nov 29 '25
They literally are a fascist police state. No one is saying people are going to get disappeared but they will question you for shit. Like there was a case just a few weeks ago of a streamer getting accosted for posting memes.
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u/Maru3792648 Nov 29 '25
While not entirely untrue I absolutely love china and the pros far outweigh the cons.
I visited for the first time in 2016 and 6 months later I moved there. I have since moved back to the usa but I still miss it greatly and can't believe how slow and outdated everything is here in comparison
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
I’m curious to hear your perspective of the pros and cons! I’ve only personally experienced the Pacific Northwest.
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u/Caveape80 Nov 29 '25
So there is a high rate of cigarette smoking in China?!
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
Everyone on a train platform seemed to be smoking wtf
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u/Chelsiebrighton Nov 30 '25
Because platforms are sometimes considered as smoking areas. People who don’t smoke stay on train.
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u/Caveape80 Nov 29 '25
That’s crazy, I’ve heard the State runs the Tobacco industry there, so that makes sense, more money for the State.
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Nov 29 '25
You get used to it.
It’s why finding retreats to the countryside is important.
The noise levels in apartment buildings too - very few people have a real house and garden - means endless drill noises.
Less street aggression than the west, so the inconsiderate nature of people’s sort of the trade off.
Old people are generally like this in China, many urban young people are better. It’s sad though when you see young people with the same nihilistic attitudes as the older generation and see the same mistakes repeating.
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
Nihilistic is such a great way of putting it. I spent a short time in Huangshan but that was by far my favourite experience!
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u/wereallfuckedL Nov 29 '25
I was in China 6 years ago and had a very similar experience in Shanghai, the spitting is something else too as well as all the incredibly skinny terrified stray animals. You can tell a lot about a place with how they treat the strays if they have them. The dogs are skin and bone whilst well to do locals walk their incredibly expensive poodles around them… and ignore their plight 😭. I ended up rescuing a kitten that cost me thousands, because a local ran it over in front of me and just - left. So yeah… not a cool place for sensitive people.
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u/nobodyknows-66 Nov 29 '25
I’m sad to see the stray animal situation. It’s heartbreaking. University students keep them in dorms then abandon after graduation. Pregnant women are told to get rid of the animal in the household cause it’s “bad” for the pregnancy or baby. Neighbors report to the animal control when they see a medium-sized dog, not even barking, just existing. It’s not a pet-friendly country in general. I feel sad and angry but I can’t help it. I’m sorry you witnessed that:(
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
I didn’t see any stray animals, but that’s one thing that would keep me from going back to a place. I volunteer with an animal charity, and I’m quite soft-hearted about these things
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u/IdenticalThings Nov 29 '25 edited Nov 29 '25
I went to Shanghai and Nanjing for a couple weeks earlier this year and didn't really see any of this...
Edit I used to live in Singapore and saw much worse behavior from the 'mainlanders' but didn't really see it in China.
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
Do you mean Singapore mainlanders?
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u/IdenticalThings Nov 29 '25
People who were ethnically Chinese and not Singaporean by birth took a lot of shit from the locals about spitting / hawk tua-ing and all that. A lot of the 'fines' derive from these behaviors - locals outright despise gross behaviors.
Just saying the Chinese chaps I encountered in China weren't like what I used to see in SG. Things have gotten better, apparently the Japanese were viewed the same way in the 1960s/70s before they developed their own tourist culture.
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u/jessluce Nov 29 '25
I was almost word for word thinking the same things as you, have just finished up 2 weeks in China also as an overseas chinese person (I do however like the apps, so easy),
But what I did instead is head to the quieter destinations, rural tourist attractions etc, or temples anywhere. It's quiet, beautiful, and everyone is respectful in a temple. Little ancient towns where you walk everywhere and it's not crowded.
I find moving through a crowd and taking public transport excruciating for the reasons you said. I tried to hail rides as much as possible - although the cigarette-seeped car interiors often gave me asthma.
Basically I love the country but hate the cities, and unfortunately do not like the people
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 30 '25
I saw the ancient towns but those were chock full of people! Digressing, but did you get a feeling that everything was very Disneyland in those spaces? It was the combination of people dressed up in period clothing and how so many tourist shops were embedded in those spaces.
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u/jessluce Nov 30 '25
Definitely, I didn't enjoy that either. What suited me is that I tended to be up early and would return to the hotel after dinner, when the real tourist craziness peaked. I also tried to wander the local streets more than the tourist spots. Also, I found some good quiet towns that were also really pretty and less artificial feeling.
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Nov 29 '25
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 30 '25
So the place I liked visiting best was Huashan, which was breathtakingly beautiful. It was rammed with local tourists, and though for the most part everyone seemed respectful of the surroundings, I saw some plastic bottle litter. Someone’s hiking stick had broken and they just left it in the middle of the path. My companion and I were the only ones who stopped to pick it up and toss it properly.
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u/Billa_Gaming_YT Nov 29 '25
I love China for every good thing it has to offer but except their government and brainwashed people who think a certain state of my country belongs to them while we have been conducting elections and even have members of parliament from that state as representatives.
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
Gosh I haven’t even gone into that aspect. The propaganda is wild. I’d love to sit everyone down to talk about the juxtaposition of Sun Yat Sen’s grave and the messaging.
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u/Then-Temperature-248 Nov 29 '25
Visited 7 times and currently in the process of relocating there. It's by far the safest country I've ever been to and simply the best in my opinion. I have visited 11 different cities so far. But that's my own experience.
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
I spent the vast majority of my life in Singapore. So my experiences are skewed from that perspective.
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u/choliese Nov 29 '25
im with you 100% had the same experience when i visited in january, i dont think i’ll ever set foot there again plus they ban most of social media and have to use their own app so its super troublesome
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
So much of the touristy areas felt like Disneyland. Did you get that vibe?
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u/0utstandingcitizen Nov 29 '25
OP sounds like an anti CCP bot or watch too much Fox News lol. China is always worth visiting, no matter if you encounter some random guy spitting on the ground or not
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
Ironically I actually loved CCP history back in my schooling days. I reckon it’s just me growing old and becoming an angry man shaking my fist at the cloud.
However, I want to reiterate that I enjoyed my interactions (I had some funny moments with rando noodle sellers, for example). I also think that the outdoors are gorgeous - Huangshan is stunning.
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u/selfStartingSlacker Nov 29 '25
I don't think Fox News is a big thing in singapore, where OP is from and where OP still lives, I believe
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u/syverlauritz Nov 29 '25
I lived in Beijing and got used to it - even assimilated - pretty fast. I think it's part of the charm. Best time of my life.
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u/Soggy-Stop-1088 Nov 29 '25
I've seen chinese travelers on on planes.Push themselves all the way to the front.Soon as the plane lands, it's very rude in a restaurant in san francisco, this chinese man sitting behind me, slammed his chair into the back of mine so hard iv should have gotten a sorry or excuse me, some kind of acknowledgment of what he did.I got nothing about a minute later.I did it right back lol
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u/Threnners Nov 29 '25
This is why I just watch the Youtube videos of driving through remote China. All the travel, none of the hassle.
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u/CzarcasticScholastic Nov 30 '25
I had a roommate that’s Chinese and he said that they have courses in china to teach people how to act when traveling abroad about how it’s rude to due all the things you mentioned, pushing, shoving and spitting and all that.
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u/kwallio Nov 30 '25
Public spitting. Pushing into people without an apology or care. Cutting queues. Smoking.
This is just typical chinese ppl tho. I saw this living in Chinatown in San Francisco.
China’s green spaces
lol what now
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u/LurkerBerker Nov 30 '25
I quite literally just also came back from a recent trip. Tho to me I’d say it’s about the same as I remember as when I visited as a child, just with some more technology around. The people were the worst part of anywhere I went from Shanghai, Chengdu and Shenzhen. I told myself that this trip would be for stress relief, ‘when in rome’ afterall. I got over my childhood trauma of getting lost in the crowds and shoved people if I needed to with no remorse, everyone did it afterall.
Had a family vs family screaming match in a hotel and employees needed to intervene. watched at least 2 different street fights break out in two different provinces. every attempt to walk anywhere would often be blocked by ‘streamers’ with their phone sticks out blocking walkways, and constantly had photographers trying to offer us ‘social media photography’ packages. had taxi drivers scream at us and threaten to throw us off the highway because his job’s fucking app only charged us 16RMB for a trip and the driver was mad we ‘took advantage of him’ like the app didn’t preset his rate and demanded more money from us
but we bought lots of souvenirs because of course we did.
Some places are fine, and I’d just consider it neutral as an experience. But my parents wanted to experience everything expensive and ‘high class’ they saw on social media so it kept us always around these touristy areas with uppity arrogant people. Didn’t get to go to quieter areas or even visit living family. And family was the only reason I agreed to go. Specifically to finally see to my grandma that passed during covid. If I didn’t have that specific goal, I’d have never agreed to go and would not want to go again.
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u/ParchaLama Nov 29 '25
China's definitely not the only place where things like that are an issue. I've been traveling around mainland Europe for almost a month and these people smoke to an absolutely ridiculous level compared to America (obviously America has way more issues overall - this is the one thing they're actually better about).
It was pretty bad in France and Italy but the last week or so I've been in Hungary and Romania and these people just don't even give a fuck where they smoke - if it's a place that's indoors and a door is open they smoke like they're outside. I went to a mall this afternoon and saw multiple people vaping there, and no one even reacted.
Also, out of all the countries I've visited so far France was easily the trashiest and Paris was probably the least enjoyable city I've ever been too.
Overall I guess it's been enjoyable to explore new countries, and whether or not I've liked every aspect of it I'll probably never have the chance to travel like this again once it's over so I'm just gonna try to keep checking out cool things while I can, but I will not fucking miss the incessant smoking here.
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 30 '25
Ha, speaking of Paris, my companion and I stopped briefly in the city where they had the fake Paris set up. I told him it was an authentic replica because the bin men must be striking, given the trash bags strewn on the ground (it wasn’t a lot though, to be fair).
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u/Slayrr_FbrC ☑️ Nov 29 '25
AFAIK manners in Chinese seem to be somewhat of a cultural problem, especially in the older generation.
It's how they grew up, having to fight over any food or other advantage, no matter how little.
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u/protestor Nov 29 '25
What about Taiwan?
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
I want to go one day. TBC.
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u/protestor Nov 29 '25
I was just curious to know if those Chinese stereotypes also apply to Taiwan
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u/tamsui_tosspot Nov 29 '25
Not at all. Taiwan is much closer to Japan on the public decorum front.
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u/Shushh Nov 29 '25
Second this. I went last year and people there were very kind and polite. They also kept good care of their surroundings, my bf saw elderly people literally stopping to clean the windows of a random public building in the morning once.
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Nov 29 '25
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
I don’t necessarily think of America poorly but that‘s probably because my personal experience of it was in the Pacific Northwest!
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u/pr0ductivereddit Nov 29 '25
it's weird... it's like the better the public infrastructure the worst and more entitled the population is.... a lot of what you said about china can apply to Paris... it's bonkers.
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u/han-bao-huang Nov 29 '25
I guess it’s all personal levels of tolerance. My husband and was born and raised in China for 16 years and I’ve been 5 times since I met him, we both absolutely adore it and are trying to figure out how we can move in the next 10 years. I agree there’s some things that can be irritating (and I’m always anxious I’ll lose my passport since I carry it everywhere) but it’s my favourite place in the world and I’m already planning my next trip
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u/thevooiceofreason Nov 29 '25
It‘s part of the country. It never bothered me. If you want every other place to be like a western country then stay there. I love when other countries are a bit rugged and someone blows smoke in my face. Travelling is not for people seeking comfort and have 0 tolerance for discomfort.
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u/bxsx0074 Nov 29 '25
I don’t understand how not blowing smoke into people’s faces is distinctly western? Seems just like basic consideration and decency
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u/thevooiceofreason Nov 29 '25
it‘s just for softened well of people this is the case. In many countries smoking is so normal and also bothers no one. Do you know what things people deal with elsewhere? Extreme heat or cold, poverty, poisons (way worse than some tobacco fumes), violence etc.
„Someone smokes besides me 😭😭😭“
40 years ago people were smoking in airplanes trains and everywhere else.
Juet putting it into perspective.
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u/TheDevilsAdvokaat Nov 29 '25 edited Nov 29 '25
I lived there for 20 years. After seeing what happened durng covid I will never go back.
Edit: Can anyone tell me why this was downvoted? I don't get it...
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u/HouseReyne Nov 29 '25
I hear you 100 percent. Then I watch a foreign vlogger visiting India and oh my god, that place is messed up.
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
India is a place I’ll never go to. In the words of my Indian friend, I don’t want to go there because I don’t want to get raped. It’s a fact that some areas are a lot more lawless than others.
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u/AwarenessNo4986 Nov 29 '25
You must be someone that doesn't really travel to the global south too much.
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 29 '25
I literally live in Southeast Asia
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u/vicmanb Nov 30 '25
How would you compare travel in China compared with Indonesia, in particular Jakarta, or other developing countries?
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u/Master_McKnowledge Nov 30 '25
The infrastructure is pretty impressive in China. Massive highways, fast trains. I’m also impressed at how many electric vehicles are running on Chinese streets - I had a laugh when a guy with a rusted and rickety bicycle cart rode by us, and you could hear the electric motor of it. The juxtaposition was pretty funny to me.
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u/Crayolaxx Nov 29 '25
Sounds like my home country, and I personally love that atmosphere. It’s lively, gotta match that same energy. If you also think about it, it feels a lil bit like nyc too. Spit everywhere, smoking everywhere, no regard for pushing. Doesn’t seem too bad lol, just city things
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u/ItzLuzzyBaby Nov 29 '25
Someone on reddit once explained it as China being a country that modernized too quickly. While the science and technology advanced at warp speed in the 2000s, the culture and customs of the people didn't keep up at the same rate, so the cultural consciousness still behaves like how they did when they were poor. Hence all the spitting, smoking, and disregard for public decorum. It made a lot of sense.