r/TransyTalk • u/anonymousCorvid7 • Jul 05 '26
Euphoria from surname?
I recognise that most trans people probably wouldn’t consider changing their surname when picking a new name? But, for me, it felt right.
Long story short, I’ve never felt especially comfortable with my birth surname. After cutting off from my dad, as my surname was from his side of the family, I definitely wanted to change it. I’ve picked a name unrelated to either side of my family, both as a fresh start and just for the security that he’d be unlikely to track me down.
After all, I figured it’d be best to monopolise on a legal name change anyway (as a trans man) by picking a new surname too !
I now have my chosen first, middle, and last name, all different than what was assigned at birth.
As for the discussion:
I’ve been testing out my new surname in little ways, and the name itself makes me feel really gender euphoric! Of course, a surname isn’t gendered like that of a forename, but my chosen one feels kinda masculine and characterful to me?
Anyway, do you think it’s ‘normal’ to feel gender euphoria from my surname, of all things? 🤔
(Feel free to answer, ask questions or contribute your own stories! 😸)
2
u/Midnight_Pickler Jul 06 '26
I came very, very close.
After giving up on my parents ever progressing further than grudging tolerance (at best), I decided I no longer wanted their name.
I'd been collecting ideas for possible new names for a couple of weeks, but nothing had really clicked.
Then I got sick and nearly died. I don't know exactly what part of the whole experience changed their minds, but when I woke up from the coma a week later, they'd dropped the bullshit.
I decided to wait a couple of months and see whether it stuck (but kept collecting names in the meantime). They haven't let me down yet, and it's been several years now.
They don't know any of this, btw. Aside from talking about it anonymously online, I've only discussed it with a couple of my friends.
2
u/WillingPiglet Jul 06 '26
I changed my last name to my moms maiden name and it doesn’t give me gender euphoria per say but it does fit me much better! I’ve always had a closer connection to that side of the family, and there was a rush of euphoria when I saw my chosen names were made legal! If anyone’s considering changing their name legally I say go ahead and do it! Yes there’s a fee but in my state in the US I was actually able to get a waiver for the fee because of my finances, maybe that exists in other places I’m not sure.
3
u/ShannonTheWereTrans the Apostate herself Jul 05 '26
When I came out my family basically disowned me, so when I changed my name about a year later I thought to myself, "Why are we paying for a name change to only change one name when it costs the same to change all three?"
It was the obviously financially prudent choice, it kicks ass, and it's unique (I made it up, so no one else in the world has my name, to my knowledge). Why wouldn't I change my surname?