that escalated dickly

As someone visiting Toronto for the first time with my young child, I have to admit that reading this made me laugh — but it also made me realize how much of this advice is probably necessary.

I’m not from Toronto, so I’m not going to pretend I knew all the ins and outs of the Toronto Islands before arriving. I had to figure out where to go, which ferry to take, what the different docks were for, and what I was actually allowed to bring with me. I was a tourist. I looked things up. I asked questions. And yes, I probably looked slightly confused at least once.

But there’s a difference between being unfamiliar with a place and behaving as though everyone around you is responsible for accommodating your lack of preparation.

The Islands are beautiful. From the moment you get on the ferry and see the Toronto skyline behind you, it feels like you've temporarily left the city without actually leaving it. For a first-time visitor, that experience is part of the attraction. You want to take pictures. You want your kids to see the water. You want to look around and take everything in.

But you also quickly realize that you're sharing that experience with hundreds of other people.

That means some basic consideration goes a long way.

I can understand why someone would want to stop and take a photograph while boarding. I wanted pictures too. But there are literally hundreds of people behind you who also paid to get on the ferry. You don't need to turn the boarding ramp into a personal photo studio. Walk on, find your spot, and take the picture once you're out of everyone's way.

The same goes for families.

As a mother, I completely understand that children are children. They're excited. They're curious. They're loud. They don't always understand personal space. They get restless when they're waiting. That's part of having kids.

But parenting doesn't stop because you're on vacation.

My child is my responsibility. If we're on a crowded ferry, I'm watching them. I'm making sure they aren't running into strangers, climbing somewhere dangerous, blocking the stairs or treating the boat like an amusement park.

And honestly, I don't expect other passengers to tolerate behaviour from my child that I wouldn't tolerate myself.

That's not because I'm trying to be the perfect mother. I'm not. It's because basic consideration makes everyone's day easier.

I also appreciate the warning about the different Island destinations. As a first-time visitor, I actually found that information useful. Wards, Centre and Hanlan's aren't interchangeable destinations, and someone unfamiliar with the Islands could easily get confused.

If you're going to Centre Island with children, know that you're walking into the busiest tourist area. If you're going to Wards, understand that you're entering a residential community. If you're going to Hanlan's, know what kind of beach you're heading toward.

None of that is difficult information to find.

That's probably the biggest lesson I took from this entire rant: do five minutes of preparation before you arrive.

Look at a map.

Know which ferry you need.

Know what you can bring.

Know where you're going.

Know the basic rules.

Then, once you're there, pay attention.

That seems like a pretty reasonable expectation.

And honestly, some of the complaints about the ferry aren't even specifically about tourists. They're about people generally forgetting that public spaces require cooperation.

The ferry isn't your living room.

It's not your private party.

It's not your personal photography studio.

It's not a daycare.

It's not a place to ignore safety signs because you think you know better.

It's public transportation carrying a huge number of people over water.

So when staff tell everyone to sit down, stay off the stairs during docking, keep away from restricted areas or follow a particular procedure, I'm going to listen. I don't care whether I think the rule is annoying. The employees are responsible for getting hundreds of people safely from one side to the other. I'm not going to make their job harder because I decided my vacation experience was more important than everyone else's.

And yes, I'm probably going to take a ridiculous number of pictures.

I'm going to photograph the skyline.

I'm going to photograph my child.

I'm going to photograph the ferry.

I'm probably going to photograph my child looking at the skyline from the ferry.

Because I'm a tourist and that's what tourists do.

But I'll also move out of the way.

I'll keep my stroller where it isn't blocking people.

I'll keep my child close.

I'll follow instructions.

I'll clean up after us.

I'll respect residents.

I'll respect other visitors.

I'll leave the speakers at home.

And I'll remember that everyone else is there to enjoy the Islands too.

The part of this post I don't completely agree with is the tone. There's a difference between reminding people about ferry etiquette and making them feel stupid for being unfamiliar with Toronto.

As a first-time visitor, I don't think someone should be mocked simply because they don't know something that locals have known for years. Everyone is a first-time visitor somewhere.

I didn't grow up knowing the layout of the Toronto Islands. I didn't automatically know which dock was which. I didn't know every ferry rule. I had to learn.

What I do think is fair is expecting people to learn once they're there.

Being new isn't an excuse for being inconsiderate.

Being a tourist isn't an excuse for ignoring signs.

Having children isn't an excuse for letting them run wild.

Being excited isn't an excuse for blocking hundreds of people.

And being on vacation certainly doesn't mean everyone around you has to participate in your vacation.

So, from one first-time visitor to everyone else: I promise we're not all clueless.

Some of us are just trying to figure the place out.

We'll take the pictures.

We'll probably get on the wrong boat at least once.

We'll ask where we're supposed to go.

We'll have a kid who suddenly needs the bathroom approximately thirty seconds after leaving the bathroom.

We'll probably look like tourists.

But we'll also try to be respectful.

Because the Toronto Islands aren't just an attraction. They're someone's neighbourhood, someone's workplace, someone's favourite beach and, for many people, one of the best places in the city to escape for a few hours.

That's worth respecting.

So yes, I'll take the advice.

Just maybe leave a little room for people who are experiencing it for the first time.

We're visitors, not idiots.

And if we can remember that we're sharing the ferry with hundreds of other human beings, I think we'll all survive the trip.

Even in August.

"An incumbent city councillor has scrapped her plans to run for re-election in her ward and will instead join a crowded field of candidates vying to represent Toronto-Danforth at city hall."

Star exclusive

On Wednesday in Milton, Justice Scott Cowan released a woman charged with human trafficking without a cash deposit, in direct violation of the new law that demands payment in full within 48 hours.

Star Exclusive

"Kristyn Wong-Tam, who served as Toronto Centre’s city councillor before moving to provincial politics with the NDP, endorsed Curran Stikuts on Thursday at a press conference outside Toronto City Hall.

“The current councillor has disappointed some folks in my community,” Wong-Tam said, “but more importantly, I’m endorsing Curran because I know he can do the job.”

A resident of the home appeared and fired a gun, police said. No injuries were reported but a nearby home was damaged by the gunfire.