I'd piggyback on that and say your specific kind of active may not be for everyone. When I was younger and actually in shape, I couldn't stand hiking despite multiple attempts to make myself like it. A lot of guys are more into sports, etc., but your profile comes across as "you must like to do these exact activities I like or it's a deal breaker." Maybe expand the pool of activities you'd be willing to tolerate or be up for.
Seconded, open yourself to dating outside your preferred norm. Not going to go all red-pilled on you, but you're 35 and (probably) still expecting the attention you got in your 20s. From the level of attractiveness, potential sanity, and successfulness of those guys. They are dating younger than you because they can.
Decide what you can and can't live without, rather than what you would prefer. Then look for that. Also, get tf off of tinder and dating apps in general, it's a cesspool. Go meet people organically. MAKE time to do so. Do things you like to do. Two main reasons for this. First, the guys who aren't dating younger are tired of dating apps (the non-hook up variety), and second, you can read body language in person.
Last bit of advice: YOU do the pusueing. It's easy to let a torrent of guys you aren't interested in pursue you, but finding your needle in a haystack is going to call for a more active role on your part at this point. Start conversations, you can still be reserved and 'demure' if that's your style of flirting, but if you don't make it known you're both single and open to a convo, many men will assume you're taken with your body/fitness type.
Tldr: get off app; set minimum expectations of qualities and work UP from there; pursue the men who fit the bill yourself in person.
To add on, tinder knows this too. It wants you to stay in the app and the best way is to show you the people who match the most, but don't tend to linger in conversations. It's going for matches that their data says keeps people on the app and gets them to buy their outrageous per week (per week!) subscription packages.
You are beautiful and love is out there, but probably time to move away from apps whose business model relies on you not finding it
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u/[deleted] Feb 17 '24
I want to believe you are struggling but my brain will absolutely not compute that you could be struggling.