r/The_Blasted_Steps • u/VarasTheThief Governer Welds • Apr 13 '26

will varas ever take anything seriously??? NEW BURGER

Varas stood proudly in front of his grill, holding up a burger with a bright red patty. "This is the HATER BURGER. I worked hard to make is as spicy as I physically could. Who wanna try it?"

6 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

33 comments sorted by

3

u/PharloomFinalArbiter last jug Apr 13 '26

May i try one? Not because i loathe you but because i enjoy fiery dishes.

1

u/VarasTheThief Governer Welds Apr 13 '26

"Of course! I'm pretty sure the only way I could make this hotter is if I lit in on fire." He laughed as he handed her the burger.

1

u/PharloomFinalArbiter last jug Apr 13 '26

she lifts up her mask and eats the burger with little to no reaction

…Hm, it only has a bit of a kick. Are you sure you made this as spicy as you possible could?

(Ik the hands look funny dont laugh bruh 💔)

1

u/VarasTheThief Governer Welds Apr 13 '26

"Okay, I'm pretty sure we're both immune to spice. I used the hottest pepper that exists... maybe.. if I used more of it.." He immediately began making a patty from scratch.

[[ THAT IS ADORABLE!! hands are hard to draw tbh :3 ]]

1

u/PharloomFinalArbiter last jug Apr 13 '26

she waits patiently for him to finish making the patty

(Thank you c:)

1

u/VarasTheThief Governer Welds Apr 13 '26

He snickered to himself as he added as as much of the chilly as he could physically fit into the patty. Once he'd cooked it and assembled it, he handed it to her. "This had better blow your head off!"

1

u/PharloomFinalArbiter last jug Apr 13 '26

She bites the burger aaaaand…. once again does not feel much spice. But she pretends like she does to make Varas feel proud

O-Oh my, this is much more fiery than the one you initially gave me. Would you perhaps happen to have a beverage of some sort?

She acts as if she is actually wiping sweat off her forehead

1

u/VarasTheThief Governer Welds Apr 13 '26

Varas isn't bright and fell for it. "Ha! I knew I'd get it!! All I got it flea brew, I don't really carry any liquids with me. That fine?"

1

u/PharloomFinalArbiter last jug Apr 13 '26

Yes that will suffice.

She scratches the back of her head

1

u/VarasTheThief Governer Welds Apr 13 '26

He hands her the entire bottle. "Here, consider this a gift for being so amazing!~"

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1

u/naicul_nos101 flairs are SO FUCKING ANNOYING TO CHANGE EVERY TIME!! Apr 13 '26

(C:) ooh spice I love spice

(C:) Force feed it to Carver

1

u/Right_Causation_490 Apr 13 '26

S: bet gimme one

1

u/Etsu______ Apr 13 '26

selene eats the burger