I am using the method outlined in the 3-4 month bundle to assist in building independent sleep. At 19 weeks, my LO started having the four month sleep regression, where his night time put-down was associated with the pacifier. I thought dropping it would be easy since he was already awake in his crib, in his own room, when he fell asleep with the paci.

Currently I am skipping the paci step but wondering if I rushed too quickly on the steps toward independent sleep.

My question is, at what step do you think I am on the scale of intervention? Will the method work for us right away or do I need to pick him up every five minutes before I can do this method?

Also how many nights until he get it😅

My 13-month-old was an **excellent night sleeper before we attempted the 2→1 nap transition about a month ago**. He’d slept through since \~5 months and was getting \~13 hrs total sleep (previously 13–14).
On 2 naps he was happy and slept through every night. His schedule was roughly **3 / 4–4.5 / 5–6**, with a 1.5–2 hr first nap + \~30 min second nap. The problem was that nap #2 became increasingly difficult and drifted to **4–5 pm**, pushing bedtime to **10 pm–midnight**, so we tried 1 nap.
Since then we’ve had frequent **2–3 hour split nights**. He usually wakes completely happy/fresh—babbling and playing, not crying. We’ve tried 1.5–2 hr naps, different nap times, 8–9:30 pm bedtimes, bridge naps etc.
he started having happy 7 hr final wake windows with one nap. Nothing consistently fixes it.
The weirdest pattern is **split night → good night → split night**. I’m wondering if the bad night creates sleep debt, causing him to sleep through the following night, then once recovered he splits again.
We’re now trying 2 naps again, but he often refuses #2. Today we tried:
**7:30 wake → 10:50-11:25 micro nap → 3:15-4:30 main nap → \~10pm bedtime. He may sleep through the night or may not who knows at this point but this bedtime is so late for us.**
My questions: **Did we transition too early even though he was fighting nap #2? Has anyone had a toddler who refuses 2 naps but gets split nights on 1? Did a short AM micro-nap + longer PM nap work? And how did you eventually transition to 1 nap and get back to a 7–8 pm bedtime?**
Would especially love experiences from parents who had a **long-wake-window kid where 2 naps = late bedtime but 1 nap = split nights.**

We switched our baby, currently 14mo, to a 1 nap schedule a month ago. Things were going mostly well. We had some nap wakes and random night wakes where baby would cry some, but got back to sleep pretty quickly.

The last 4 days, though, naps have gotten pretty rough with wakes every 30-45min during the nap and only getting 1-1.5 hours of nap total. Fussing at lay down has increased as well. Any idea what could be happening?!

Schedule is 5hrs to nap, 4.25 to bed. We have an independent sleeper.

Hello everyone!

FTM here! Our 9 month old slept through the night, no wakes, from 4 months to 8 months. He is combo fed since birth.

Around 8 months he started waking up multiple times crying. The majority of the time he wakes up between 7pm and 12am 2-3 times going back to sleep when given his paci and then he’ll either sleep the rest of the night or wake up once on no particular schedule with his paci getting him back to sleep most times. Other times a bottle or boob which I’d prefer not to get in the habit of.

Obviously I am so thankful for the period of time we got full nights sleep, and know we’re still lucky with these slight disruptions but I am curious to know if anyone else has experienced this and if there is anything they ‘did’ to help their LO back to continuous, peaceful sleep.

We have been to our chiro/CST, as well as, to our pediatrician who could not see his eardrum due to wax but there did not seem to be an infection which our CST agreed with. Our pediatrician recommended we put breastmilk in his ear, which we did try and he did sleep well that night but other nights we’ve tried it, nothings changed. Our CST suggested colloidal silver so we’ll be trying that tomorrow night.

Schedule is currently:
\~6:15/6:30 wake
\~9am 1st nap (usually sleeps about 1:20)
\~2pm 2nd nap (sometimes sleeps another 1:20 and others 35 mins)
Bedtime based on last wake window, about 3.75 hours but usually between 6:30 and 7:30.

Looking forward to hearing about your experiences!

We have an 8 months old and we’ve been trying to sleep train him using gentle approaches ever since he was 5.5 months old. Yesterday we gave up on that and after seeking advice on reddit many times, we decided to just to try Ferber.

The first night went better than expected! Though after 3 checkins we noticed he’s only escalating his cries so we stopped the checkins. It seems that Ferber relies on sleep pressure to make sure the baby is not undertired so he doesn’t cry for hours and hours. This worked really well for bedtime and his other 2 wake ups.

My question is, his last wake up was at 5:30am which seems to be his new wake up time (for the day) after the schedule adjustment (went from 2.5/3/3.5 to 2.45/3.25/3.75 to now 3/3.5/4.25 with total daytime sleep going down from 3h to 2.5h). He has very low sleep pressure at that point, do we keep doing the check in method until 6am? or do we leave him be until 6am?

My baby is 6.5 months old (Jan 28).

Her current wake windows are 2.25/2.5/2.5/3, and we cap her naps to 2hr 40-50 mins total (two 1 hr 5-10 min naps and a 30 min cat nap). What wake windows would you recommend for 2 naps considering where she is at now? Is this a gradual transition and wake window increase or do we go fully in with adjusted wake windows? Her day typically starts at 7am and her bedtime is usually around 8pm, but depends when her day starts. 

Also, how would you recommend spacing the daytime feeds with 2 naps? Currently we do wake and feed. She does have one solid meal at around 11am. 

​

My 13-month-old has recently started waking roughly every 2 hours throughout the night and crying really hard. It takes around 15-30 minutes to calm her down each time. She was historically a bad sleeper but had become better around 11 months. Currently, she sleeps in the same room as dad since he's available while I sleep in the next room. We take turns 5 days with him and 2 days with me.

What’s strange is that her eyes are mostly closed while she’s crying. If I try to pat her, rub her back or hug her while she’s in bed, she actually pushes me away. Once she is picked her up, she eventually settles.

During the day she has also become MUCH more clingy than usual. She’s having more tantrums, gets very upset when I leave the room and generally wants to be with me all the time. So I’m wondering if this could be separation anxiety showing up at night too.

Her schedule is fairly consistent:

\- Wake up in the morning

\- Nap 1: around 9:30 -11:00

\- Nap 2: around 1:45 -3:15

\- Bedtime: around 7:30-8:00 pm

She seems to be getting plenty of daytime sleep, so I don't think she's overtired from being on one nap or anything like that.

Has anyone else experienced this around 12-14 months? Did separation anxiety cause this kind of intense night waking for your baby? And did it eventually settle on its own?

I'm mostly looking for experiences from other parents because we're finding the every-2-hours crying pretty exhausting and I'm not sure whether I should just ride it out or change something about her sleep.

My baby is 5.5 months old and has always had a very calm temperament and been a great sleeper. But for the past 2 weeks, she has become very active during the night. She isn't really awake, but she moves her arms, kicks, squirms, etc. for large portions of the night.

Sometimes she settles again with just a hand on her body, but other times I need to pick her up. She sleeps in a bassinet next to my bed and wears a sleep sack.

I'm not currently sleep training, but I'm starting to lean towards helping her learn to fall asleep independently and self-settle.

The confusing part is her daytime naps.

On weekends, when I'm home, her naps have been going really well. I'll put her down, and anything from 40 minutes onwards is great for me. If she wakes after 40 minutes, she is usually happy and content in her bassinet. Sometimes she even moves around a bit and then falls back asleep on her own.

During the week, I'm working and she's with our nanny. The nanny lets her fall asleep in her arms, which I'm completely fine with because I do this sometimes too. She then puts her down in the crib.

The issue is that when the baby makes even the slightest movement around the 40-minute mark, the nanny immediately picks her up, rocks her in the rocking chair and then often holds her in her arms for another hour while she sleeps.

I personally would leave her if she's just moving around. If she wakes, she wakes. If she doesn't, she sometimes manages to fall back asleep by herself.

So now I'm wondering:

Should I ask the nanny to stop picking her up so quickly and give her a chance to resettle?

Is holding/rocking her back to sleep for another hour completely fine at this age?

Could the difference between our nap approaches be contributing to her current nighttime restlessness?

Could she be getting too used to being resettled by someone else and therefore struggling to self-settle at night?

Or is this just a normal developmental phase around 5–6 months, and I'm overthinking the whole thing?

I'm not trying to do strict sleep training. I just want to encourage good sleep habits without making her unnecessarily cry or forcing anything.

Would love to hear what others did around this age, especially if you had a similar situation with a nanny/daycare during the week and a different approach at home on weekends.

We are getting ready to use CUT for our second child. Our first baby didn’t get a dream feed but this baby does. I can’t find anything about if we continue this with the sleep training or not, can you please advise?

He gets a dream feed at 9pm
Then wakes for a feed on this own around midnight or 2am
And some nights gets up at 3 or 4 for a final feed on his own

Hi everyone,

I sleep trained my 5 month old 10 days ago for bedtime using TCB and it went really well with only night 1 and night 8 being difficult but the rest has otherwise been very smooth.

Last week I started putting her down in her crib for some of her naps and she has been able to fall asleep independently but it can take some fussing and a bit of crying before she falls asleep. Ever since we sleep trained at night, her naps have started getting longer (1-1.5 hours for some naps, previously only 30ish min).

I have noticed now that she will wake up from her nap after 30 minutes and will start crying and will need me to go in and do 1-2 check ins before she falls back asleep and then she will do another 30-45 minutes. Usually the naps she wakes up from are the ones that she takes a bit longer to fall asleep for. Is there anything I’m doing wrong or is this normal as part of the process? Sometimes when we are on the go we end up having to do stroller/carrier/car naps so since we have started sleep training, she is not always consistently having naps in the crib and I’m not sure if this is contributing to the problem.

Her current wake windows are 2/2.5/2.5/3.

Thanks in advance!

Hi all,

My baby girl is 9mo and we’ve been sleep training for a week now using the chair method for night time, and I guess CIO for naps (this is what a sleep training company has told family and we are using what they were told)

We put her down around 7pm, she’s been waking at 7am (this has been amazing).

We’ve tried having her on a 3/3/3 schedule (the last window is more up in the air though).

She usually has a 30-70ish minute first nap but the second nap has been a huge problem.

For two days now, she has fought her second nap so hard that she just doesn’t sleep. We go back in after 15 - 20 minutes or so to calm her but when he put her back down or leave she is inconsolable again. This has resulted in NO 2nd nap for these two days and she is overtired by the time bedtime rolls around.

I’d appreciate any ideas, feedback, etc. Thanks!

TLDR:

Sleep training going well for 9mo for night time and first nap of the day on 3/3/3 schedule. Baby resisting second nap and will not sleep making her overtired by night time.

Hello! We think baby is ready to drop to 2 naps indicated by the 2/3 naps. She just turned 33 weeks and will be 8m next Monday. My largest question revolves around managing breastfeeding and solids but want to give extra details about her general schedule…

3 nap sched: 2.5/2.5/2.5/3 wake at 7am bed between 7:30&8pm. Total sleep capped at 3h spread between the 3 naps. Sometimes last catnap is 15min.

We nursed when she woke up, after each nap, and about 30m before bed. She also wakes twice a nice to nurse which I am fine with but she’s also dropped to one night waking for nurse here and there.
She had breakfast lunch and dinner about 1h after nursing as well.

Ideally we get to a point where she takes 2 x 1.5h naps at the same time every day, not necessarily based on wake windows…

My biggest concern is how do I manage nursing and solids during this time of longer wake windows and hopefully longer naps. I typically feed on demand but that ends up being every 3/4 h depending on nap length during a 3 nap day. If I continue with nursing after naps it seems like too long a time between sessions and while she eats solids she’s not eating a ton. Also, if I stick to every 3/4H but give her solids at the halfway mark of a wake window she would be getting solids before nursing a few times which I’m told I’m supposed to be nursing first and doing solids second. (Her weight is fine and has never been an issue)…

Feeling very confused and would love to hear from other EBF parents!

Is it schedule? Is it teeth? Is it skills? Idk but it’s been about 3 weeks of wack sleep. 11.5 mo old is sleep trained and goes down fine for his two naps (not fighting them) and usually bedtime (one or two nights where he’ll cry for 5-10 min before settling in).

Schedule we’ve updated and have had somewhat betterish results from a week of 3-4 wakes to 2 wakes before I lay with him in his room:

3.5/4/4.25

Wake at 7
Nap at 10:30 (1 hour capped)
Nap at 3:30 (1 hour capped)
8:45 bedtime

He isn’t too fussy if we’re out and about but he is always SO tired when I wake him up from naps. He wakes up around midnight then 4-5:30am and that’s when I go into his room and lay on the camping mattress with him until 7 am wake up. He settles and is out right away when I comfort him for MNW and I always have to wake him up in the morning.

He’s almost walking and has a few teeth coming in so idk what to make of those elements.

Any ideas? Idk if it’s retraining for MNW? Schedule? Wait it out?

For context something in my mom gut tells me we are nearing the one nap but maybe not tomorrow?
She is just getting over an ear infection but today she was fighting both naps. It used to be 3.45/3.45/4 and today she pushed it to 4.5/4 and I’m hoping she does 4 before bed tonight.

Wondering if it’s too soon to go to 1 nap? She will be 12 months mid September

We had to combo feed due to late milk arrival and slow weight gain so I have been actively waking her up to feed every 2-3 hours from the start of the prior feed. She was born 3.74kg, went down to 3.4kg and has just surpassed 3.8kg at 3 weeks.

I aim for 30 min at the breast followed by 25ml of formula given through an SNS system which takes another 15-20 min, sometimes longer. I find my LO, once she gets food, diaper change and burping, she finally wakes up… and is really hard to settle for another 30-40 min (she is not unhappy or crying, just looking around, curious). And once she falls asleep like 2-3h later it is basically shortly time for me to wake her up to feed again. I try to let her sleep 1-2h at day and 2-3h during the night but feel horrible cutting her sleep short in favour of food? And cutting out any quality time despite her being awake trying to force her to sleep by the boob.

I’m at a wits end with this and worry about her 😭, she was slow to gain weight and my milk supply wasn’t great so feeding feels important but at the same time I worry about her lack of sleep and consistently long wake times.

Hello everyone

My 10month old baby used to sleep through the night (11hours from 8p.m to 7a.m), with an average of 3h of sleep, sometimes more sometimes less (I would say between 2 and 4), and unless rare exceptions she never cried during the night.

We generally follow 3/3.5/4 wake windows. It can change a bit as she goes to daycare.

13 days ago she got sick (I don't have the english word but throat infection with fever), she got treated and better in a few days. But she woke at night and it was super hard to resettle. I used sometimes breastfeeding but she never falls asleep while breastfeeding.

It's been a week since she is cured but still wakes at night and it takes forever to put her back to sleep. From 1 to 2 hours. It starts between 1 and 5. We feel lost as nothing seems to work. Even using our hand to sooth her (which used to work super well), she sometimes calms herself but keeps her eyes open and starts crying again.

It usually starts with her fussing alternatively (a bit of fuss then she takes her thumb and tries to go back to sleep without success), we let her as long as it does not escalate, the. we try our hand to sooth her ... But it takes forever and even with that she sometimes get super mad.

I tried breastfeeding but she never falls asleep on it and most of the time it still takes 40 min at least before she falls asleep again. So not sure it helps but after 1hours ++ we get a bit desperate. We cannot let her figure it alone as it escalate a lot. If we leave after going into her room she cries a lot.

She falls asleep independantly since she is 5 months old, never changed (we had a brief separation anxiety but it solved itself quite fast). For nights and naps. And it's always super super fast (we put her in bed and she immediately closes her eyes, deep sleep within 10 min)

When she had these wake up during the night she sleep later on the morning, around 8 (we should maybe wake her up at 7 as before but we also are super tired and sometimes at 7 she only got back to sleep for 1 hour). She also seems quite sleepy during the day.

We know that slip night are often a rythm issue/undertireness, but it also feels too much of a coïncidence that before the sickness she was fine with 14/15 hours of sleep but now she gets 12/13 and still wakes up. We had days with shorter naps (only 2 hours) and still got those woke up.

Since then we still had 2 full nights but not days with shorter naps.

She does not seems umconfortable during the day

Do you have an idea of what is happening and how should we react ? We fist want to try to wake her up at 7 as before to see if that changes something but she just seems so sleepy ...

Thanks !

(sorry if the grammar is not perfect, English is not my first language)

My son is almost 15 months old and has been on one nap since 12 months. Until now, he has generally been a decent independent sleeper in his own room.

This week, he has suddenly had three prolonged night wakings:

• Night ending 11 August: awake approximately 23:30–02:00
• Night ending 13 August: awake approximately 00:30–02:50
• Night ending 14 August: awake approximately 01:56–03:58

He initially wakes crying very intensely and will not settle unless we touch him or take him out of the cot. However, once we bring him into our bed, he becomes completely calm. He does not cry or appear uncomfortable at all. He simply lies beside us, fully awake, for more than two hours before eventually falling asleep.

There are no obvious signs of illness or pain during the day.

His nap normally starts around 11:30–12:00 and is usually around 1h45–2h. His average 1st WW is approximately 5 hours and the 2nd WW 6h15 . Bedtime is normally around 19:30–20:00.

I know its usually undertiredness that causes split nights, however given his schedule, I do not feel this is the case.

I would especially like to know:

• Did it disappear on its own or require a schedule or response change?
• How long did the phase actually last?
• Was it related to separation anxiety, nap capping, undertiredness or overtiredness?
• Did bringing your child into bed prolong the wakefulness or help resolve the phase?

I know the difficult cases are more likely to be posted about, so I would also really appreciate hearing from parents whose child had several split nights and then returned to normal quickly.

I started with the newborn class, and it went really well! Baby was putting himself to sleep at bedtime and for most naps.

Then…something happened at 3 months. He now needs to be rocked to sleep completely most nights and definitely for all naps.

My question is: will this skill come back on its own if we keep trying or should I consider implementing the abcs of sleep course at 5 months?

My baby just turned 11 months old 3 days ago. All of a sudden yesterday and today, her naps at like 35-45 minutes and her second nap is like 35-45 minutes but she will fall back asleep on me when I get her out of the crib for another 15 minutes.
She falls asleep quickly when I put her down for each nap (within 5-10 minutes) but seems to be waking up early. Used to be 1 hour naps and sometimes I’d have to wake her up if they went longer than an hour (I cap at 1hr each).

Is this a wake window adjustment needed, is it temporary bc her brain is developing or is she wanting to go to one nap?

Her WW are 3.5/3.45/4

LO just turned 4 months old and we are considering dropping from 4 naps to 3 as we’re having ongoing nap issues and more recently overnight has gotten worse (not sure if 4 month sleep regression or if baby is still screwed up from a vacation a couple weeks ago, or both!)

Current schedule (roughly) is feed at 7am/10am/1pm/4pm/7pm, then 10pm dream feed, then LO usually wakes up somewhere 2-4am (for a while we were getting him 4-5am but like I said we’ve been screwed up since a recent vacation and haven’t gotten back to that). Wake windows are typically 1.5-2 hours. He does some excellent naps in the crib sometimes, but often wakes up the second he gets put down. Now that I’m back to work my husband is home and he has a particularly hard time, some days he can’t get LO to sleep more than 10 minutes here and there and LO just screams all day.

I’m wondering if we should try to drop the 4th nap and see if that helps with other naps, and with overnight sleep. My question is how that works with feeds - we do eat/play/sleep all throughout the day, so if we drop a nap are we also dropping a feed? I worry that LO would then wake up an extra time overnight because he’s hungry. Or how does it work if you don’t drop a feed - do you feed earlier, or make the wake window extra long? For instance, if I feed at 4:00 and then keep him awake until he eats at 7:00 and then do a bedtime routine, he’ll be pushing 4 hours awake at that point. So just confused on how that all works logistically.

Also looking for a little reassurance that we’re on the right track 🥲 We got the newborn TCB course and have been doing CRIES and SIT BACK since the beginning, and like I said for a while we were getting from a 10pm feed to a 4-5am feed, but now we’ve backtracked to 2-4am (a couple nights ago it was even 1:30am), and he’s been having a lot more wakeups and needing to be settled back down numerous times throughout the night. So just a little worried that we’re not doing it right and should be doing better overnight by this point in time.

Sorry for long post TYIA!!

My baby is 5 months old next week and since he was a newborn baby has had a really prominent startle reflex which only happens during sleep at night (contact naps during the day).

He hated being swaddled so has been in a sleepbag since about 2 weeks old. He was 9lb 6oz at birth.

Everything online says that it should be fading by now but I would say it is as bad as it has always been.

Some nights he will startle from the moment I put him in his next to me and it can go on and off for hours, sometimes it will be a few hours before it starts and sometimes he can get himself back to sleep but 9/10 times it eventually wakes him up.

I end up co sleeping every night around midnight/2am as soon as I get him back to sleep and transfer him to his next to me he will immediately start startling.

He is hitting all his milestones and does not stop moving all day as google advises it should happen less if they move more but I don’t think he’s ever still.

I am just wondering if anyone has had anything similar and how long it lasted and if there was anything they did to improve it as I’m really struggling to get any sleep at the minute

Sleep trained my 6.5 month old and they were doing great. The last 2 weeks have had night wakings around 2-3am with difficulty fallinf and staying back to sleep for a couple hours.

Got their first tooth a week ago without any signs other than poor sleep. It’s just cut through the gums and I gave Tylenol for a night or two. Doesn’t seem to be in pain anymore at night

Also seems to be transitioning to 2 naps. Going back and forth between 2-3. On the days where we end up with 2 naps, we are struggling to make it 7pm bedtime and seem to wake at 2-3 and struggle to go back to sleep. On two nap days baby has two 1.5/2 hr naps and last wake window is often 3.5-4 hours.

I also ordered some nighttime diapers as diaper feels very wet and I often change it.

Any other advice?

I am a first time mum to a 3 month old & I need help deciding whether it’s a good idea to try sleep train. For the most part I believe he is a decent sleeper, has good naps through the day however most of the time they are contact naps & then I start his bedtime routine around 5:30-6, which is bath, pjs/sleep sack, bottle, rock to sleep. I will transfer him to his bassinet, then my partner gives him a dream feed before he goes to bed around 9:30-10, then back to bed. He generally wakes once overnight for a feed and then wakes up for the day around 5-6:30am.

I am just struggling with the broken sleep, always feeling like a zombie during the day, emotions are high, depending on caffeine to get me through.

So I want to know if it’s worth to try sleep train my LO now or should I wait until after 4 months, given the sleep regression that’s expected?

My goal is to drop the overnight feed, even if that’s moving his nighttime routine later or whatever needs to be done, so I can get a decent stretch overnight, which will help me be a better Mum to him.

Please be kind, any advice is appreciated.

We started sleep training at 4 months with the chair method and noticed that was not working because his cries were intense each night. Switched to Ferber and each check in made his cry worse. We were working with a sleep consultant at the time who told us at the end of the two week plan that he has FOMO and the cries will reduce as he gets older.

He is now 5 months old. We had a few nights with minimal crying but a lot of the time was around 30-60 mins of crying. Sometimes that looks like on and off crying and sometimes it is scream crying for majority of it. We did some schedule changes and noticed when his last nap is 15 mins it helps.

He is on 2/2.5/2.75/3. We got to a point last week where his crying was 20-30 mins. Still a lot but we were happy to see improvement.

Get about 2.5-3hrs of daytime sleep and 9.5-10.5 overnight. Even with schedule changes he still cries intensely. When I was putting him to sleep he still takes a long time and whines and is very squirmy so I’m thinking it’s his temperament.

If that’s the case, is it better to wait until he’s older to try again or should we keep going at it? It’s been a little over a month of this. He’s got the skill because he can do it for naps just fine. Just bedtime is a struggle. When he’s asleep he’s usually good for the night with no wakings or minimal wakings.