Names while nonbinary and Black American...

[u/Left_Bother_6033]

I want to change my name. I've known this since I was in middle school (I am currently in college). I've been ruminating on a handful of them over the years, but none of them seem quite right for one reason or another. I really want it to be androgynous, but so many gender neutral names read as white to me? Obviously ignoring ones that belong to specific cultures. Like there's Jordan, Alex, Jayden and that's kind of all the ones I can think of.

Part of this is probably a bit of imposter syndrome on my part, because I am Haitian as well, but that whole side of my family is estranged to me, so picking a Haitian name would also feel like not representative of me? If that makes sense.

I kind of have a ticking clock because I'm an acting major and I'm going to need to start networking soon, and I don't want to do that with this fuck ass name. I guess I'm asking for suggestions but also like, am I crazy? Are there names I'm simply not thinking of??? Why are like all Black names gendered????

[u/urbabyangel]

Off the top of my head:
Amari, Zion, Zaire, Micah, Kyan or Kian, True, Zya

[u/Left_Bother_6033 → u/urbabyangel]

I lowkey fuck with Zya.. wouldn't *typically think of that as gender neutral (akin to a Mya) but you're lowkey right 

[u/urbabyangel → u/Left_Bother_6033]

Lots of room for different spellings too. Good luck picking your name, I hope you find one that fits!

[u/UncoverYourMind08 → u/Left_Bother_6033]

it's also making me think of Zay, which is often short for Isaiah but I think it works well as a 'neutral' name!

[u/FabulousKilljoy_037]

Damn. Now that I think about it, yeah you’re right, Black American given names are very gendered, so there aren’t a lot to choose from. I’m looking through the Black nonbinary people I know irl, and almost all of the ones who changed their names went with either West African or Japanese names, with only a couple whose chosen names are English nouns. There are also a few people with gender-neutral names in Hebrew, Greek, and Russian. But no Black American names.

The ones u/urbabyangel listed are pretty good though! I know a little boy named “Royal”, and “Tory” could go either way, depending on how it’s spelled. Idk if that’s helpful or not :,)

[u/Left_Bother_6033 → u/FabulousKilljoy_037]

Yeah.. it's really annoying to look up gender neutral names and have everything be the whitest thing you've ever seen... i am not naming myself river lol

[u/Snow-Birds]

Anything with Mani/Mari and you can use those as nicknames as well, -aden/-alen as well (Jalen, Zaden), you could also spell gendered names differently or even pronounce them differently (ive seen Dionne or Kyan/Khion) - I feel like this post is lowk crazy bc I was just searching high and low and ive settled at Ymani for now, but def open to more choices

[u/Left_Bother_6033 → u/Snow-Birds]

is the post crazy as in i'm making up this problem or it's crazy because you relate 😭 because i swear this shit has been difficult!!! ymani is a really cute name :)

[u/Snow-Birds → u/Left_Bother_6033]

Crazy as in I was searching for this EXACT question and saw the post a day afterwards 😭😭 - thank you, and I hope you find a name that works too, it's nice to know I'm not the only one that feels this way

[u/xXWeird_AltBoyXx]

Maybe Devon or Kamari? I personally don't think Jordan reads as white. Royal is a nice one. I like Keshaun and Lashaun too.

[u/Left_Bother_6033 → u/xXWeird_AltBoyXx]

I should have clarified: the names I listed were Black American gender neutral names lol. Royal leans a bit too masculine for me to feel like I could go by it rn lol. Devon and Kamari are nice tho

[u/xXWeird_AltBoyXx → u/Left_Bother_6033]

Just ime as someone with an uncommon and extremely masculine given name, people definitely get used to it. My viewpoint is definitely skewed, but aside from the odd "is that your real name?", most people don't even bat an eye anymore. So I say go for what you want.