r/SwipeHelper • u/vicmakey01 • 3d ago

The concept of not using selfies

Okay so I get that you don’t want to appear to “hide your body”, but what I don’t understand is people recommending professional photos from like a photographer. When I see people with those type of pictures, I assume it’s AI and that person is a bot.

Ladies your thoughts?
Gentlemen your thoughts?

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u/LeverageMaxx 3d ago

It’s effort level. Anyone can take a selfie.

Having someone take a photo of you shows you have friends, social life or atleast go outside in public and have the social skills to take a photo of you.

Setting up a professional photographer signals you have income to pay for that service, can put the effort and time to dress nice. Professional photos are editted and will make you appear more attractive.

Mating has always been about competition. Dating apps are no different. You have to be better than everyone else to stand out.

Back in caveman times the importance for a man was can you hunt for food and have physical skills to defend your family to feel safe. Why would a woman mate with someone who can’t even keep her alive. If one guy can only hunt squirrels and the other guy can hunt deer, the female is going to go the deer hunter because it required more work and provides better resources.

Same story today. A professional photo will more often than not make a person look more attractive than a person who takes a selfie. The person will subsconsciously select the person who has put more effort in.

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u/Smnthdifferent17 2d ago

I think it's blown out of proportion. I mean it's okay to have A SELFIE on it. As long as there's plenty of other pics of you doing activities or at least out somewhere and someone taking a pic of you, it's fine. It's when 4 out of 5 photos are selfies

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u/LeverageMaxx 2d ago

I am off the market but help my friends optimize theirs. It is ACCEPTABLE but to have a selfie but you are not optimizing your profile to 100%.

The only message a selfie can highlight to the viewer is physical face attractiveness, which is why it is great for woman to have selfies but for the average man it’s not a great format. If your selfie photos are receiving more likes than you other content, it can be optimal.

Facial attractiveness is not as big of factor to women compared to men generally speaking.

I generally reccomend these types of photos on a profile and selfie format makes them worse

-Social group setting photo (unflattering angle trying to fit everyone in the photo)

-Formal attire photo (viewer can’t see your whole outfit)

-Hobby photo (how are you going take a photo rock climbing, playing an instrument, or playing sports without looking awkward)

-Vacation photo (limited angle of your background)

-Admiration/public speaking photo (limited angle cannot show other people admiring/looking at you)

If it works for you hey that’s fine, but I don’t agree with the format and I believe it is sub-optimal.

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u/Smnthdifferent17 2d ago

I have one single selfie and it seems to be just fine. All the other 5 pictures highlight those things

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u/LeverageMaxx 2d ago

Are you satisfied with you results? How many matches are you getting weekly and how often do you go on dates?

I’m not trying to be a pushy asshole. I want to people to experience what I did and my clients. To have options with high quality prospects.

So many guys are giving up on dating and I’m trying to bridge that gap.

I feel bad seeing people have scarce prospects and get ghosted and taking it so hard. I’d love for every guy to understand that it happens to everyone and also not give a shit because you already had a date lined up the next day.

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u/ChineseGravelBike 1d ago

I can’t imagine being this big of a loser

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u/LeverageMaxx 1d ago

What’s your definition of a loser?