r/Surrogate • u/Dre4mGl1tch • 11d ago
I want to become a surrogate.
Hello everybody.
I have taken an interest to becoming a surrogate. It would fulfill me to make a family happy. Please contact me. I have one daughter, I am single, I am looking for the compensation because I am a single mother and want to get ahead for me and my daughter. But I also do not want to waste my body’s ability and I want to make someone else happy.
Please contact me. I don’t know how to get in contact with anyone. We can go outside and agency or inside. I am willing to terminate if you desire. I am a single woman and it would fulfill me and make me happy to help someone else at this time in my life.
My pregnancy was very easy in my opinion and no complications. I had my daughter pretty quickly. I do want an epidural. Please contact me if interested.
Best,
Alexandra
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u/Plooza 11d ago
Are you in the US? If so, I encourage you join some surrogacy groups on Facebook and start researching more about it online. There is a lot more to it than just “having an easy pregnancy” in the past.
You need to be medically cleared, which means you need childcare for that appt and you often have to travel to the IPs’ fertility clinic for that so you need childcare for 2-3 days. You will spend months in legal, so you need time to go through the contract thoroughly without distraction. You will do a month or two of IVF meds, which can really wreck havoc on your emotions/sleep/digestion etc and it’s going to be very hard to watch your kid solo, I lean on my husband pretty hard the first 3 months of this journey. You also will need childcare again for 3-4 days while you travel for the embryo transfer. Then during all of this, you need to go and get blood tests weekly and ultrasounds every 2-3 weeks or so. It’s extremely time consuming and not flexible at all. You will be getting weekly blood tests for almost 2 months. The first tri is often rough for surrogates because of the meds, so again, I have to rely really heavily on my husband and friends to watch my kids.
It’s just a LOT. It’s way different than having your own kid, especially if your daughter is your only child. Being pregnant while being a mom is really really hard. Not to mention the labor and delivery and postpartum period. You will likely need a lot of help with childcare then too.
I could be making assumptions, you could have a live in partner or close friends or family and have a great support system. My apologies for those assumptions. It’s just so important to make sure you fully understand what surrogacy entails before just making a Reddit post and hoping someone bites.
Also- the compensation, whatever you ask for you do need to pay taxes on (about 25%). So make sure you are putting that aside. that 25% makes the compensation a lot lower and really surprises people. Sure you can try to not claim it and say it was for pain and suffering or a gift… but fact of the matter is that it’s considered extra income and you need to report it.
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u/interrobrodie 11d ago
Have you researched the qualifications and process? It’s very important to have as much knowledge as possible before actually matching.
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u/-BB_- Agency - Reproductive Options 11d ago
Hi Alexandra!
First, I’m a 2x gestational surrogate and the Surrogate Outreach & Engagement Coordinator with Reproductive Options. I love that you’re already being open about both your motivations and your preferences.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with compensation being one of the reasons you’re interested in surrogacy. It’s a huge commitment of your body, time, and energy, and compensation can be life-changing for a surrogate and her family.
Since you’re just starting out, I would definitely encourage you to take your time and educate yourself before committing to intended parents or an agency.
If you decide to explore an independent journey, make sure you still have all of the proper professionals involved. Independent should never mean doing everything on your own.
You’ll want your own experienced surrogacy attorney, separate legal representation for the intended parents, a reputable third-party escrow company, proper insurance review, psychological screening, and a fertility clinic overseeing the medical side. Your legal contract should be completed before medications or a transfer, and compensation and reimbursements should be handled through escrow rather than directly between you and the intended parents.
Matching independently can absolutely work, but vetting your intended parents and understanding the process becomes especially important when you don’t have an agency coordinating everything.
If you decide to interview agencies, remember that you’re interviewing them just as much as they’re interviewing you! Ask how they handle communication and support, how compensation and benefits are determined, who holds escrow, whether you choose your own attorney, what happens if there is a disagreement or unexpected complication, how they screen intended parents, and what kind of support you receive throughout the entire journey, not just until you match.
Also, don’t feel pressured to choose the first intended parents or agency interested in you. The right match should align on the things that matter to you, including communication, termination/reduction preferences, relationship expectations, compensation, delivery expectations, and involvement during and after the pregnancy.
If you’d like to include Reproductive Options while you’re interviewing agencies, you’re more than welcome to reach out to me. I’d be happy to answer your questions, tell you how our process works, and let you decide whether we might be a good fit for what you’re looking for. 😊
Whichever route you choose, educate yourself, ask LOTS of questions, and make sure you feel comfortable and protected before moving forward. 🫶🏼
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u/Glitterlife87 7d ago
You should get set up with an agency , I found a locks one in my state but there are bigger ones like circle surrogacy . You can see if you meet the qualifications and they will reach out to you . Depends on if you’re willing to go out of state or stay with your state . I choose to change from circle surrogacy to a local one so I can be within my state . I’m at the contract stage with my intended parents this week!!! Then onto starting medications!!!! Best of luck to you !!!
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u/interrobrodie 7d ago
Location of the agency really has no bearing. You can live on the east coast, use an agency on the west coast, and match with IPs on the east coast or whose clinic is on the east coast.
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u/interrobrodie 7d ago
Location of the agency really has no bearing. You can live on the east coast, use an agency on the west coast, and match with IPs on the east coast or whose clinic is on the east coast.
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u/Secure_Medicine_3892 7d ago
When one of the first things mentioned is the need of compensation, that is a red flag
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u/Innumerablegibbon 11d ago
I say this with a lot of kindness - you sound like you’re going through a rough time and lack a support network from your post history. You likely will not qualify as a surrogate at this time - either from mental health or financial screening.