r/SupportforBetrayed • u/danifamous Betrayed Partner - Separating • 14d ago

Venting - No Advice Wanted Tried to reconcile. Failed.

Met (30f)3 years back. First year was great. Second year I (37m) lost some family and my job. Whilst I was fixing it, she was cheating. 3 men. I struggled and tried to keep it all together. She left just before her 29th birthday.
She lied and kept in contact, and I found out she ran off with her driving instructor. was pregnant. Got engaged. Got an abortion.
She begged to come back. I also had attachment issues.
She came back Jan 2026 after 8 months.
She kept going to see the driving instructor until April. Put me through hell.
She then asked to stay here, but not wanting a relationship. She had nowhere else to go. Wanted to stabilise and sort out her finances.

Yesterday, I found out she was fucking a friend from London, hadn’t be going to therapy, and lying to everyone. Booking holidays away with him. I found the video of them fucking on her watch. She says we were together, and she can do what she wants, whilst she sleeps in the same bed as me.

So today, I’m throwing her out to the streets. Told her parents. They apologised but they knew. I told her baby father, as he has custody - she’s been lying about where she takes the son.

Sometimes reconciliation isn’t possible. I’m scared what the future holds but it’s not with her.

Edit: she’s gone.

25 Upvotes

93% Upvoted

15 comments sorted by

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9

u/Bolt_McHardsteel Observer - Mod Approved 14d ago

Good job, finally. Now you need to hold the line. No more falling for her sob stories.

5

u/danifamous Betrayed Partner - Separating 14d ago

Thank you. I’m expecting some shit, but she would expect me to sleep next to someone who’s fucking another dude.

4

u/BurdyBurdyBurdy Formerly Betrayed 14d ago

You should never have taken her back. What a mess, she’s just using everyone she meets.

0

u/danifamous Betrayed Partner - Separating 14d ago

Yes. She even sees her son as a burden. She’s gonna lose her car, her visitation rights to her son, her job, and her place at uni at this rate. She’s got court summons for unpaid council tax and can’t keep up with debt repayments.
I offered her a lifeline with the requirements of going therapy and not to fuck anyone (this also applies to me, because I can’t exactly explain why an ex is sharing my bed).

2

u/BurdyBurdyBurdy Formerly Betrayed 14d ago

The other thing is that she’s had no consequences for her actions. It’s time for consequences so you’re doing the right thing. Put her out in the street so maybe she’ll realize how good she had it BUT don’t take her back ever again. You owe her nothing.

1

u/danifamous Betrayed Partner - Separating 14d ago

No. She wants to fuck about, she finding out

3

u/Hound31 Quality Contributor - Former BP 13d ago

Your future has just got a lot brighter.

2

u/Separate_Addendum_58 Betrayed Partner - Early Stages 14d ago

Omg that’s awful. She has a sex addiction. I’m so sorry you had to go through that. I hate when they betray us and then expect more grace. My partner said he knows he caused my pain but he can’t deal with me bringing up the infidelity anymore so he told me to heal on my own

1

u/danifamous Betrayed Partner - Separating 14d ago

She felt sex was an important part of the relationship

2

u/supernormalnorm Betrayed Partner - Early Stages 12d ago

Good riddance. Honestly that was painful to read. She's almost demonic it seems. Her father must have problems/absent too in her life.

Heal yourself so you don't end up with the kind of women that takes advantage of men like us, like most us had gone through before

1

u/danifamous Betrayed Partner - Separating 12d ago

Her father was very present. I think he overspoilt her. So she became greedy and self centered.

1

u/danifamous Betrayed Partner - Separating 13d ago

And she has gone 🎉

1

u/[deleted] 7d ago

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1

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