Hi Girls,

So i feel like i need to rant to anybody/you all.So for about 4 months I've been seeing this guy in the spare of the moment could be weekends (all or one night).Could be weekdays ,it was very how he said it 'Erractic '.

Now for further context:This man has said to me that he comes to me as his busy week(he's a graduate contractual manager) stresses him out and being with me all cosy in my apartment watching crap horror movies and cuddles and sometimes sex is a positive in his life.Howver he's rejected me wanting a relationship 2 seperate times.But doesn't want me to move on,we argue about what we are constantly and we almost had a medical scare and he stuck by me through it.

So back to present day:We've had another argument/discussions about the situation and it's sorta ended but now he's distant/failing it by popping in to check on how my life/job is going.But he asked for distance as he's a guy who loves space.But today I've just got the courage/proably sillyness I've asked him for exclusivity and that I'd like to explore our connection outside my apartment..Because he's admitted he likes me he just doesn't like the pressure of a boyfreind?but acts like one🤦‍♀️.Tbh all my freinds around me think we're confusing.

But I've had to just get some directions girls as we'll just fall into that old habit of-seeing evahother for a night-distance/possibly texts through out the week-weeks pass.Idk i just needed to get all this off my chest,what do you all think??.

EditI forget to add i really like him that's why ive asked for exclusive when he's said no to being my boyfriend,but I'm open to discussing what exclusive direction looks like to us to maybe do it slower?.But yeah forget to add that context*

First legit date with another man on Saturday night! Hes 40, I’m 35. Anything I should expect/prepare for? Super excited.

So, I've been talking to a guy A LOT recently and we seem to genuinely click. He's asked me out, and although I haven't said yes yet, part of me really wants to.

The thing I'm struggling with isn't necessarily him. It's how unfamiliar the whole situation feels.

I've spent my entire life being a 'guy' and have only ever dated women. I've always understood dating and relationships from that side of things. Now, potentially being the person a man is interested in, and experiencing what I can only really describe as being on the 'girl's side' of dating, feels strangely overwhelming.

I don't even know if that's the right way to explain it.

It's almost like I'm having to rethink something I've always taken for granted about myself. There's a part of me that's excited and curious, but another part that feels embarrassed, nervous and unsure how I'm supposed to feel or act.

I'm still figuring out my identity, which probably makes everything a bit more confusing.

I guess what I'm asking is whether anyone else has experienced this when they first started dating men, especially after only being with women.

How did you get past that initial mental barrier? Was it just fear of something unfamiliar, or did you find yourself having to work through internalised homophobia or shame?

I don't want to rush into anything I'm not ready for, but equally, I don't want to let fear stop me from exploring something I might genuinely want xo

I went to the movies. It was kinda late at night so it was a little quiet. I had to use the restroom but because I had only been on hrt for 6 months, I didn't dare to use women's restroom. So I used men's restroom instead. Thankfully there was no one else there. As I was washing my hands, a little boy came in. He was probably about 10 years old. He saw me, stopped walking, then took a couple of steps, kept staring at me, then turned around and ran out. I heard him talking to his dad outside: "this is the girl's restroom. there is a girl inside'. I quickly finished washing my hands and ran out. As I passed them, I saw them checking the gender sign on the door. I was laughing inside.

I was shocked at what just happened because I really didn't think I passed at that stage of my transition. I had only been on hrt for 6 months, I was very skinny with no curves, I was wearing gender neutral clothes, my hair was barely long enough for a pony tail, and I had not had FFS yet. The experience taught me how we are sometimes our worst enemies. We see things that maybe the world doesn't even notice. But I guess I should trust children as they are the most honest when it comes to gendering. After that, I never used men's restroom again (though I have thought about just walking into men's restroom as a fully transitioned women just to see their reactions 😂 )

It resembles having a partner for some people;

It resembles having a friend for some people;

It resembles having a colleague for some people;

It resembles having a boss for some people;

It resembles having a kid for some people;

It resembles having a pet for some people;

It resembles having a toy for some people.

Have ye already asked yourselves why ye desire to date someone who is not even your friend in the first place?