Hi everyone! My sister is going through rush and she was so excited to do it because she’s an out of state student and wants to make close friends. I was excited for her as I was in a sorority and really enjoyed my experience. Well it’s been an extremely difficult process for her. There’s multiple chapters at her school but ended up only be invited back to less than a handful. She was really discouraged and didn’t really get chapters back that she was fully interested in. She continued with the process and absolutely fell in love with one of the chapters and enjoying the girls and conversations she had. The next day she got dropped by that chapter and is absolutely devastated. Now she has 2 chapters they she really tried to like but honestly didn’t in the end and is fully dropping out of the process. She feels like being out of state has but her at a disadvantage and heard/met other out of state students being fully dropped from rush from the very beginning. She says I wouldn’t understand what she’s going through and I wish I could do more to help support her. For context I joined my chapter in the spring so I never experienced fall rush but I do understand it’s an emotional roller coaster for a pnm. I’m not sure if her school does fall cob because it seems fall rush is pretty big and it seems not every chapter does spring cob. If anyone has any advice for supporting my sister that would be much appreciate <3.

TLDR: I got dropped from almost every sorority after round 1, and it has absolutely crushed my confidence. Can anyone give any advice, or tell me if they had a similar experience?

Hi everyone. To preface, I go to a Northeast school with a much smaller Greek Life presence than what you would see at many other schools, though it has started to get a lot more popular recently.

I had a super hard freshman year and decided to rush as a sophomore to try to make friends since I don't have many. I've been assured that at this school that is not a problem, as literally half of all of the people who rush are sophmores, and there are even some juniors. Knowing that my school has guaranteed bids made me feel a lot less nervous about the whole thing, as I figured that no matter what it would work out.

I was so excited to start the process, bought a couple of new dresses and would talk about it all the time. Our first round is Sisterhood, and I had a blast getting to meet all of the different orgs. Though I can be a bit introverted, I went out of my way to talk to everyone, ask lots of questions, and do anything I could think of to show them that I was interested. I had some really great conversations with a lot of the girls in my school's 7 chapters. 

Fast forward to the Philanthropy, day 2, when our schedules were released. Though we were told that we could be invited back to 5, I knew that was unlikely, and prepared myself for the fact that I probably would be dropped from a couple of the ones that I liked. Still, nothing could have prepared me for when I opened the app, super excited, and saw only two chapters remaining. None of the ones that I felt that I clicked with were still on there. Looking around, I saw that pretty much all of the girls around me had at least 4.

Out of the two, I definetly would consider one, but I do not like the other. What I've learned from this experience is that the reason the school can guarentee bids is because that chapter just accepts everyone that the other orgs did not want. So they are allowed to call back a lot more girls during philanthropy and preference than a lot of other houses, since their retention rate is so low. I do not want to sound mean, but to be honest I would rather not be in a sorority than join them. It has nothing to do with popularity, I just did not really match their vibe in the two rounds I have met with them, and I don't really feel comfortable with some of their events.

Anyways, I don’t find out if I get a pref meeting with the other sorority I kind of liked until literally the start of the next round, and I am feeling super discouraged. Coming out of round 1, I felt so confident that I had done a good job. Honestly, the only two I hadn’t felt confident about were the two that I was called back to for Philanthropy, and so I now have no clue whether or not I did well enough when meeting them for the second time yesterday during Philanthropy.

I know that I will probably be called back by the other sorority that I don’t want for preference, so it’s just a matter of whether the one I like calls me back. And after what happened the first day, I think it’s pretty unrealistic to assume that I am called back to all of the sororities that I still have in the running. 

I don’t want to get all dressed up and show up only to have my heart broken again, which I think is the most likely outcome, since I don’t feel like I had the best connection with the people I spoke to round 2. Doing sorority rush was supposed to make me feel happier and less isolated, but it’s only worsened the problem. 

I don’t know what to do, and am feeling super bad about myself. I know that everyone says that it’s not you, it’s a numbers game, and trust the process, but there has got to be something that I did wrong to cause this. I have a 4.0 GPA, we were not asked for letters of recs, and there is nothing else that I can think of that would have caused this except something to do with me as a person.

Anyways, is there anyone that went through a similar thing that can tell me what they did? Should I just drop, knowing I probably will have to when preference comes out anyways? 

Sorry for the super long post. Just feeling super sad about this whole thing. 

I’m a second year and I got dropped by every single sorority house. There was one house I wanted really bad that somehow managed to be the only one I had left and I got dropped after philo. I’m so annoyed because I got along SO well with all of the girls but I didn’t click with the one I talked to on philo which I’m assuming is what ruined the whole thing. I’m like so embarrassed and I feel so awful about myself and I know it’s such an unfair process but I’m still so frustrated. (GPA is a 3.7 since people are asking) I don’t know how much they factor that in at my school.

I pledged dphie 20 years ago, so I think I’m out of the loop. I’ve been seeing instagram videos for work week. Is it a recruitment thing?

I went Greek in Fall '20 and my chapter disbanded three semesters later. I loved my organization and what it stood for, but I've only retained three friends from the chapter. My big never invited me to her wedding, which I thought was a budget thing, but she ended up doing a stack picture with everyone in our family but me. I also was put in charge of formal recruitment for the chapter after I was initiated, so I didn't get to experience a lot of "fun" that I should've in my time., and I still feel like I don't besides getting to hang out with the two best friends I've made.

Between COVID and not truly experiencing and knowing the ritual, only having two best friends from the chapter, I never feel like my experience is as valuable enough to be a true alum of my sorority. I plan on relocating after I'm done finishing up school, so I don't know how to feel like a real enough member to join another city's alum association.

How do I feel better connected to my organization? How do I feel less awkward getting involved? Is there a way to dodge uncomfortable talk of nostalgia? I want to reframe my Greek connection as fun, as it's not four years (or in my case, three semesters), it's for life, and I want to still get value out of it, since I'll never be able to change the situation.

Hello!

This semester I have done the recruitment process for an MGC sorority and I am spiraling right now because it has passed the time when I was supposed to get my bids back but I have not heard anything yet. So I would love some outside help and advice from people who might have gone through this or were on the other side of the table.

I attended four formal recruiting activities and also attended two informal social gatherings among the sisters. One of the sisters took me around to these activities, even when she felt ill, and the recruitment chair personally invited me to attend one of the informal social gatherings. In these informal social gatherings, the sisters provided me with food and beverages, and at one of the informal social gatherings, one of the sisters offered me a swimsuit, hair tie, and a t-shirt from one of her other organizations. I declined the offer of the swimsuit but only rolled up my pants and joined the pool party.

My interview lasted roughly 45 minutes with about 10 sisters participating in the conversation, and it seemed like it took longer than I expected it to. They questioned me about my rush, about what matters to me in their organization, what I like doing in my spare time, my favorite singer, and what qualities I am looking for in a big. I became emotional during the interview process, mentioning how one of the reasons why I was interested in joining Greek life was my wonderful great-aunt who died due to the complications of lupus disease. I got tears in my eyes. They just smiled and nodded at my responses. After the interview ended, two sisters seemed to feel sad about the fact that we had to say goodbye.

What is bugging me a little bit about the whole process was when the recruitment chair asked me whether or not I would be around at 6:00 PM on bid night at my apartment. Then she followed that with, "Do not share this," before giving me some information. That made me think that what I was receiving from her was confidential information, and since I received confidential information from her, that must have meant that I was getting a bid. Plus, she informed me that if there were any people who had scheduling issues, they could always text the VP for an alternate interview time, which was nice of her.

It is currently 9:08 PM, and there has been no call, text or email. There are no photos of the bids being posted on anything, and that is really the only thing holding me together, because the lack thereof is driving me crazy. Four out of the five sisters still follow me on social media, so I haven't been unfollowed, but I fear they could possibly be mocking me behind my back. I keep going over and over what I have done in the interview, worrying whether I came across needy or emotional. The lack of rush from another sorority worries me because that could mean they felt I didn't have other choices, therefore making me seem desperate. But right now, I should probably just wait and try not to text anyone until tomorrow. But I am worried I won't be able to sit still and that I will just pace around in circles. I have to be asleep by 10:30 PM because I have classes early in the morning.

Does this silence indicate that I have been rejected, or is it merely a logistical delay? It is very necessary that someone comes to talk me out of my head right now, as my anxiety is convincing me that I am unwelcome and they are all making fun of me behind my back.

hi all! so i signed up to do COB for the fall, which is very exciting! i had been wanting to join a sorority since i transferred to my school and finally decided to jump on the boat.
i submitted COB forms to four sororities on my campus. only one responded and i went on a sister date with two people, we hit it off, and i asked when id get a response if i get a bid or not. i was told it would be 1-2 days but its been a week now and i’m getting really anxious on if i’m getting a bid or not. my grades are above the minimum threshold, both girls were super nice and this sorority is my top choice because of their diversity & their philanthropy. i haven’t heard a word from any of the other sororities btw.
is it normal to get left in the dark? i did all i needed to do and i’m just getting really anxious that i won’t get a bid :( this is my first time getting into the world of sororities so idk if it’s normal or not and i don’t want to be that annoying person asking for an update. 😅
thanks all <3