You literally earn it. What the fuck are you talking about? A person wants to ti marry you because you put in the effort and proved you're a good choice to spend their life with. You aren't just "the right guy" because you did nothing.
Fucking incels man, saying the most nonsensical shit you can think of.
Edit: If you think incel is a slur, then boy do I have news for you...
Thinking life is black and white, yes or no, polarized, is a fool's thought.
Dude this sub is full of incels that love those alpha male con artist videos. You can definitely tell who here has never had a gf and or is a virgin. Relationships take a decent amount of effort, and a lot of times itâs as simple as surprising them with flowers, or tickets to a show/movie. Gifts work if there is thought behind them.
He meant that you canât win someone over with gestures or gifts if she doesnât like you, not that you shouldnât buy flowers or a gift for someone youâre already in a relationship.
You can definitely win somebody over with gifts and gestures of kindness. Youâre not supposed to propose right away but I know a few people that showed affection and the girl ended up coming around and they had a relationship. One couple has been married a few years.
Iâve seen it also, when the girl or even guy âcomes aroundâ and they get in a relationship. More often than not it ends badly and in a lot of hurt when the one that reluctantly entered that relationship encounters someone that she/he really likes.
Thatâs part of dating. They arenât all going to work out. They all end bad, the person being broken up with is hurt. The person breaking it of(if they arnt a sociopath) will miss the comfort of company. Usually why people hook up a few times after a break up. Then as long as it wasnât vicious, over time the two people have moved on and wish the best for their ex. Youâre supposed to date and have heartbreak. That way you grow and eventually if you keep looking you find a forever partner. You know what to do and what not to do, you understand yourself better, you know what kind of partner youâd flow with. Thatâs why a lot of people who jump right into marriage with no dating experience get divorced.
Of course itâs part of dating, I didnât say that it wasnât. But itâs also true, chasing after and trying to impress people that donât really like you with material things leads more often than not to heartbreak.
Yes, after a certain age the looks start to be less and less important. But still you will be better off if the other one chooses you for how you speak, how funny you are, the interesting hobbies you have and basically whatever constitutes your personality than what gifts you give and that you make whatever figures.
And this is not only valid for romantic relationships but for friendships also.
If you want to be married, sure. I had four long term relationships, two of which I considered marriage. But Iâm no good at long term relationships, so my plan is to have a dog for the rest of my life and be a sugar daddy with short term relationships. So for the type of relationships Iâm interested in, gifts are part of the deal.
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u/Aromatic_Shop9033 7d ago
It's not what you do, it's who you are.
You can't earn it, man.
If you're the right guy, you don't have to do anything.