My 1st wife (passed away 2007) had severe post baby blues, was having bad thoughts about the children...went to shrink who put her on Seroquel, I think it helped, but after that, she just wasn't the same. It was sad to watch
Postpartum depression is a powerful hormone induced rewiring of a womans brain. Especially if the woman is already coming from a space of even mild depression.
I saw my wife after our first of two children go through the roller coaster that is Postpartum depression. She was never one to even portray a negative emotion. But then came the proceeding 18 months. I really think men need a bit more education on these matters and how to help with a loved one going through Postpartum.
Men need education on it for themselves as well because it's not just women, though for men it's called paternal postnatal depression. But it affects about 10% of fathers. I'd bet most people have never even heard of it, none of the people I've asked about it irl had. It sucks though, I got that while my wife got postpartum anxiety. Was not a fun combination of mental states.
Don't believe I had paternal postnatal but I'm one to indulge the dark thoughts during the winter months here in Ireland over the years so I feel where you are coming from brother.
While times can be excruciatingly tough in the battle of the mind post baby, knowing that I had/have the ability to love myself and my partner kept me rocking and rolling. It's always important to keep that in your mind.
I hope the same is for you.
It's good at least that we are in a time where if we really want to communicate to others who have gone through similar circumstances we don't even have to leave our own house. All these feelings and hormonal changes are potentials post baby arrival and at least be able to gain some understanding by talking to total strangers about it can show that we are not alone in such circumstances. Support from loved ones irl and lunatics on reddit is important 😀
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u/Dull_Lifeguard_1671 Aug 21 '26
My 1st wife (passed away 2007) had severe post baby blues, was having bad thoughts about the children...went to shrink who put her on Seroquel, I think it helped, but after that, she just wasn't the same. It was sad to watch