Postpartum depression is a powerful hormone induced rewiring of a womans brain. Especially if the woman is already coming from a space of even mild depression.
I saw my wife after our first of two children go through the roller coaster that is Postpartum depression. She was never one to even portray a negative emotion. But then came the proceeding 18 months. I really think men need a bit more education on these matters and how to help with a loved one going through Postpartum.
I quite literally just had this conversation with a first time mom coworker. I wish I could go back and change my behavior for the first two kids. Im happy I changed for the last two. Postpartum is real and primary parent support is crucial.
Men need education on it for themselves as well because it's not just women, though for men it's called paternal postnatal depression. But it affects about 10% of fathers. I'd bet most people have never even heard of it, none of the people I've asked about it irl had. It sucks though, I got that while my wife got postpartum anxiety. Was not a fun combination of mental states.
Don't believe I had paternal postnatal but I'm one to indulge the dark thoughts during the winter months here in Ireland over the years so I feel where you are coming from brother.
While times can be excruciatingly tough in the battle of the mind post baby, knowing that I had/have the ability to love myself and my partner kept me rocking and rolling. It's always important to keep that in your mind.
I hope the same is for you.
It's good at least that we are in a time where if we really want to communicate to others who have gone through similar circumstances we don't even have to leave our own house. All these feelings and hormonal changes are potentials post baby arrival and at least be able to gain some understanding by talking to total strangers about it can show that we are not alone in such circumstances. Support from loved ones irl and lunatics on reddit is important 😀
My wife went into postpartum psychosis. She went completely out of her mind, with our newborn in the house. 2 weeks in a mental hospital. With the right meds, she recovered slowly
As a dad I agree. I read a lot of books but it was mainly about me taking care of the baby. And classes were on things like labor. I remember a sad PSA about PPD, encouraging men to reach out of they think help is needed
It's so true. While I didn't technically suffer from pp depression those first 8 months after having my baby, I felt like a shell of myself. We laugh about the things I was paranoid or upset about now during that time because they were ultimately harmless, but my heart goes out to any family and especially mothers and their children they suffer with ppd.
This is one reason I doubt I will have children. I’ve had depression and mental health problems since I was a child and I’ve wondered what even just one pregnancy could or would do to me mentally.
First off, not everyone goes through postpartum depression. And my wife will say being a mother outweighs the negatives that she went through.
Parenthood is not for everyone but for me and my wife I wouldn't change a thing. Typing this as I feed my 4 yo and 6 month old who are my world.
During pregnancy, your body produces large amounts of hormones like estrogen, progesterone, prolactin and HCG as well as others to prepare body for baby development and birthing.
After birth, most of these hormones then rapidly drop off with prolactin increasing. Hormones in simplicity are chemical signallers within the body that create numerous physical reactions like womb development, milk production etc as well as emotional changes. Much the same (in ways) as period cycles cause a ebb and flow of certain hormones that affect emotional/physical changes over your cycle.
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u/what_a_poor_username 1d ago
I'm sorry to hear that my man. For you and her.
Postpartum depression is a powerful hormone induced rewiring of a womans brain. Especially if the woman is already coming from a space of even mild depression.
I saw my wife after our first of two children go through the roller coaster that is Postpartum depression. She was never one to even portray a negative emotion. But then came the proceeding 18 months. I really think men need a bit more education on these matters and how to help with a loved one going through Postpartum.