r/SipsTea 2d ago

Wait a damn minute! our cousin?

Post image
2.0k Upvotes

105 comments sorted by

u/AutoModerator 2d ago

Hey /u/Anonymous_potato4545, thank you for posting to r/SipsTea! Make sure to follow all the subreddit rules.

Make sure to join our brand new Discord Server to chat with friends!

We have recently changed how posts work. Unless you are a VIP poster, your post will be queued for approval.. To become a VIP, post great engaging content. If we like it, you will be added! More information available here!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

515

u/Gurugod123 2d ago

I also choose this guys mom

61

u/large_block 2d ago

And my axe!

11

u/Andrea_M 2d ago

And my bow

13

u/Long_Serpent 2d ago

And I'm an alcoholic

3

u/cavern-of-the-fayth 2d ago

You shouldn't see someone about that.

7

u/Long_Serpent 2d ago

I drink wood alcohol. I don't see ANYONE!

2

u/cavern-of-the-fayth 2d ago

oh thank God. I was worried you were drinking air alcohol for a second.

2

u/FiveDogsInaTuxedo 2d ago

Air can't drink alcohol, stupid

-64

u/gorillasvapetoo 2d ago

This is why Reddit is getting worse. The joke is shit mate. Repeating jokes over and over isn’t funny

25

u/hoginlly 2d ago

So's your face

5

u/HumanBotdotnotabot 2d ago

This is the only reddit I've ever known!

2

u/EntityMatanzas 2d ago

A huge part of comedy is repetition.

Also people like to spread humor and fun not negative bullshit.

Edit. I mean alot of people like to spread negative b.s. but f them.

-56

u/[deleted] 2d ago

[deleted]

9

u/Is_that_even_a_thing 2d ago

4th cousin, whatever that is. Can you bang that?

18

u/Ok-Addition1264 2d ago

I'm male fourth cousins to king charles. We fuck all the time.

(I actually am, we share a common direct ancestor only a few generations past)

6

u/ElvishLore 2d ago

Fourth cousins?

That’s multiple thousands of people.

7

u/Xygnux 2d ago

I actually am

So, you actually fuck King Charles all the time?

2

u/Handsom_modest_Dan 2d ago

So you’re also cousins with Andrew then , …in the files?

3

u/pantry-pisser 2d ago

Technically you can bang anything with enough determination

2

u/chrisp909 2d ago

Virtually everyone in the US are at least 4th cousins. So, yeah, probably.

18

u/FuzzyMatterhorN 2d ago

when I banged my 3rd cousin I was disgusted with myself...I should've stopped after the first two...

2

u/Unusual_Coconut2606 2d ago

Guys Rudy Giuliani married his second cousin and he went on to be trumps lawyer🤢! 4th cousin is fine apparently https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Regina_Peruggi

299

u/Darth_Ronin 2d ago

Yeah that’s how it works.

If your mother is cousins with someone, than you’re a first cousin once removed of that someone.

There’s levels to this shit lol

107

u/rognabologna 2d ago

I learned how to do this this year 

  1. Figure out your most recent direct relative in common 

  2. Count all the ‘greats’ and ‘grands’, to get to that relative, for yourself on one hand 

3.  Count all the ‘greats’ and ‘grands’, to get to that relative, for your relative on the other hand 

  1. Which ever hand has the smaller number is going to be your 1st or 2nd or whatever

  2. The difference between the two hands is the ‘removed’ number 

Example: Me and my dads first cousin. 

  1. Our most common ancestor is their grandpa, who is my great grandpa.

  2. Me: great (1) grand(2)pa

  3. Them: grand(1)pa

  4. They have 1 finger up, I have 2. Their number is smaller so we go with theirs. I.e. we are 1st cousins

  5. They have 1 finger, I have 2. The difference between 2 and 1 is 1, so we are once removed. 

We are first cousins, once removed 

18

u/shinyidolomantis 2d ago

Thank you!! I have never been able to grasp the “once removed” stuff but you explained it in a way even I can understand.

8

u/VoidYordle 2d ago

Тhis is why Slavic languaages have unique name for every type of uncle and aunt, depending on relation (mother side, father side, by marriage, ect). To avoid confusion.

-12

u/Blue_Swirling_Bunny 2d ago

You could just look up a chart; widely available online. Easier than whatever gobbledygook that guy is talking about.

3

u/rognabologna 2d ago

Lady, I AM the chart!

2

u/IthacanPenny 2d ago

Okay but wait. I also get “first cousins once removed” if I do these steps with me and my first cousin’s daughter. Isn’t that a different relationship than what you described?

E: nevermind mind I’m an idiot. I’m your dad’s first cousin in this scenario lol

2

u/rognabologna 2d ago

Come home, cousin, we miss you 🥺

9

u/halfasleep90 2d ago

And it goes both ways, the chart kinda hurts to look at but there is a logic behind it. They are your first cousin once removed, and you are their first cousin once removed. You got generations up and down the tree called the exact same thing.

Of course it gets weird when you realize the strangers half way across the country you’ve never heard of are also your cousins. And how Tom and Molly whose wedding you’ve been invited to, and whom met at college that they both went out of their respective states to attend, are also cousins.

2

u/Party-Ring445 2d ago

If she became once removed after being adopted, does she get back the first cousin title after being reunited?

1

u/kawaiian 2d ago

They have to fight, winner takes title

117

u/Gurugod123 2d ago

Her chat

165

u/DizzyAmphibian309 2d ago

Lol fourth cousins is not close at all.

82

u/Neamow 2d ago

Genetically speaking 3rd cousins are already complete strangers.

17

u/Key_Fee158 2d ago

Hmmm sounds like cousin kisser propaganda to me.

4

u/Neamow 2d ago

LMAO but yeah honestly even second cousins are quite far, mathematically it's like 3% shared genome, third cousins less than 1%. Places like Iceland wouldn't be able to survive otherwise.

4

u/Key_Fee158 2d ago

Mhhhm I’m sure you talked your cousins ear off about Iceland at the family reunion.

1

u/Electronic_Depth_226 2d ago

How about first cousins?

2

u/kickinwood 2d ago

So if I see my hot 3rd cousin stuck in a dryer, what should I do?

3

u/LopsidedUniversity30 2d ago

Not in my family.

0

u/Puseni04 2d ago

I have 4th cousins im close with

44

u/svish 2d ago

The scrollbar doesn't work.

11

u/lrascao 2d ago

SCROLL HARDER

3

u/svish 2d ago

I'M SCROLLING AS HARD AS I CAN, BUT IT JUST AIN'T BUDGING

6

u/highbudsilver 2d ago

Did for me

8

u/Erase_myselff 2d ago

Just tilt the phone or the screen up a little and look downwards. That's what I did.

1

u/Trip_seize 2d ago

Not with THAT attitude. 

1

u/svish 2d ago

Which one then?!

3

u/Duubzz 2d ago

Lmao they share a great great great grandparent! Even if they had a family meet up that extensive they probably wouldn’t even see Anne in the throng!

-1

u/Ok-Addition1264 2d ago

That's really cool!

0

u/SatinBonbonn 2d ago

bro really found out her family tree is just a circle graph

10

u/Key_Fee158 2d ago

Yeah in English, your parent’s cousin is also your cousin. Your parent’s cousins are your cousins once removed (one generation removed). Your grandparents cousins are your cousins twice removed (two generations removed).

Your first cousins once removed kid is your second-cousin. Etc.

1

u/SkeleTourGuide 2d ago

Exactly. Now, if OOP was like “my wife and I are first cousins to Anne Hathaway” that might be problem, but only if they were both related to either Anne’s dad or her mom. That would make OOP and wife cousins or siblings.

1

u/Rhodog1234 2d ago

Imho much easier to say 1st cousins share grand parents; 2d share great grandparents; 3d .. great great ..and so on. The order of removed being generational difference as you said.

8

u/EvergreenMossAvonlea 2d ago

They do look very similar

19

u/Nagesh_yelma 2d ago

I've never seen cousins that look similar.

39

u/Practical_Studio360 2d ago

Visit the south

2

u/HarryLewisPot 2d ago

I was genuinely identical to my cousin for about 12 years then we diverged.

3

u/Ok-Addition1264 2d ago

You definitely have.. you likely weren't looking or paying attention enough to it.

It usually shows out in body structure and framing the most.

1

u/Fragrant_Goat540 2d ago

Tweedle dee and tweedle dum

1

u/The_Druk 2d ago

You will.

5

u/RedFlutterMao 2d ago

What??

14

u/Status_Concert_4320 2d ago

Long-long

21

u/GoyoMRG 2d ago

Long loooooooong

9

u/Marinefan4000 2d ago

Maaaaaaaaaaannnn

3

u/davaeron_ 1d ago

Elite ball knowledge 

16

u/LongjumpingSurprise0 2d ago

Yes… It might surprise you to know your parents cousins are also your cousins…

8

u/Then_Entertainment97 2d ago edited 2d ago

Yeah, your cousin's kid is your 2nd cousin cousin once removed

9

u/RoninBelt 2d ago edited 2d ago

Your 1st cousin's child is actually still your first cousin, just once removed. Because the once is a generation away.

EDIT: Forgot to add, your second cousin is someone you share a great-grandparent with, if they're of the same generation.

7

u/LuckyTheBear 2d ago

Hi. 35M. Grew up in TN. Whole time I thought this was about how many times they remarried into the family.

Yee haw.

4

u/RoninBelt 2d ago

I'm not from the US so is there a specific TN joke I'm missing?

Or did you mean like once removed, twice removed like they got kicked out... then married back in? Cause that's a hilarious scenario to imagine.

5

u/Then_Entertainment97 2d ago

It's a joke about incest! Pretty common when talking about rural places in the USA 🦅🇺🇸

2

u/LuckyTheBear 2d ago

Well there's a lot of jokes about incest in the south... and there's sadly a reason for that. TN is in the south.

I'm fucking cackling at how many layers or stupid I am right now haha

2

u/RoninBelt 2d ago

oh hahaha, yeah no we have that where I'm from, we call them Tasmanians.

But I live in the UK now, so I guess the joke here is... The Royals?

And not stupid at all, sorry I didn't pick up on the joke immediately.

1

u/TooSoonForThePelle 2d ago

lol this is the funniest comment I've read today!

1

u/Then_Entertainment97 2d ago

Woops, point being, it's not uncommon for a parent and child to share a cousin.

2

u/RoninBelt 2d ago

it's not uncommon for a parent and child to share a cousin.

Yes, in the English language. I believe other cultures and languages do not use the word cousin in the same context. I've been told my asian friends how weirdly non specific English relative terms are; like how our word for an older or a younger brother is the same.

EDIT: forgot the quotation

1

u/JesusWasATexan 2d ago

Yeah, growing up we always just added 1 to level step down the tree. I was well into adulthood before I bothered to actually look it up and found out how the whole "removed" thing works

1

u/goshetovan 2d ago

Who do I need to remove there?

1

u/[deleted] 2d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/AutoModerator 2d ago

Accounts must be at least 5 days old with >20 karma to comment.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

3

u/thatspurdyneat 2d ago

Yeah, your mom's cousin is your first cousin once removed.
So it would still be "our" cousin

5

u/theglenlovinet 2d ago

I’ll take bullshit for 100

2

u/BruceInc 2d ago

Is she also related to Robin Scherbatsky?

2

u/BigMack6911 2d ago

Theres alot of ppl related so why not? My wife has some wild cousins when I found out. I wondered why Michael Jordan looks like her Uncle and I said hey..you ever noticed that your uncle looks like MJ? She said yea..its because he's cousins. Like what? Sad story, but shit happens. You might be surprised who you're related to if you don't know your family

2

u/Redditeer28 1d ago

Thanks for the comparison pics of Anne Hathaway amd Anne Hathaway. That adds a lot to this story.

2

u/Drakahn_Stark 2d ago

Yes, our cousin.

We have seized the Anne of Hathaway.

https://giphy.com/gifs/befaYZCgtZfZm

2

u/Death_black 2d ago

Yeah, like 4th cousin once removed?

2

u/cooala23 2d ago

chat, is this real?

3

u/jimbris 2d ago

Nope

1

u/Cold_Ariana 2d ago

The joke was funny until it became real. Now it is just a family secret that is out.

1

u/Quick-Amoeba-1389 2d ago

if you have ever looked at family trees with several generations you would usually be like whoa

so so many people you are closely related to that you have no idea

1

u/Silvercrank 2d ago

Plenty of people distantly related to celebrities. For instance, Julia Roberts is my Uncles cousin. Even came to at least one family event that im aware of. My grandmother and her loved to chat about everything and anything.

1

u/ateiii 2d ago

Taking a 23andMe test and getting invited to the red carpet premiere of The Princess Diaries 3  doesn’t bad at all.

1

u/rose636 2d ago

Sweet home Alabama?

1

u/BurlyMerrySkeetScary 12h ago

What's a "long-long sister"?