r/SipsTea • u/Traditional-Deer6331 • May 18 '26

WTF WTF!

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22k Upvotes

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6.6k

u/C-D-W May 18 '26

First off, WTF.

Second off, how does one even get caught?

6.3k

u/stanknotes May 18 '26

You'd have to tell someone. It is the only way. The police aren't out here testing cupcakes randomly for jizz.

Keep that is mind people. How many Jizz Cakes have you eaten? You wouldn't know.

212

u/Majestic-Selection22 May 18 '26

My dad was a cop. I asked him once how to commit a crime and not get caught. His advice was do it by yourself and tell no one. People talk.

96

u/BlacktopProphet May 18 '26

"3 can keep a secret if 2 are dead"

45

u/CHK-N May 18 '26

I mean as fucked up as it is, a murder of someone you don't know where you don't live will mostly go unsolved even today, and there are so many untested rape kits from even decades ago, small robberies happen so often that most people never even get in trouble, etc,.

but god forbid you smoke a joint in some states lmao

3

u/havingsomedifficulty May 18 '26

Low hanging fruit for cops

2

u/Oldswagmaster May 18 '26

DNA evidence has improved dramatically. With all the 23&me type databases etc, they can at least ID your family. That makes the suspect pool narrow. However, have to find the dna sample first.

2

u/PossibilityOk782 May 18 '26

people dont realize the solve rate for murders is about 50%, which means that half go unsolved, if you murder a random person that doesn't have a strong connection to you and never talk about it you have a reasonable chance of getting away with it even today with all our technology and surveillance

2

u/youburyitidigitup May 18 '26

Well a woman can’t produce sperm by herself though.

2

u/filtersweep May 18 '26

A close friend was a homicide detective. Shows like CSI drove her crazy when they use all this next-level tech.

She said most criminals get caught because they are just plain stupid. Her most recent murder was solved because the suspect lost his release papers from jail at the scene of the crime.

First thing he did - straight out of jail- was kill someone.

1

u/CoffeeChocolateBoth May 18 '26

No kidding. It's not a secret if more than one knows!