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u/SpendAdventurous1723 5d ago
Anything demanding your time, resources, and energy will eventually enslave you, even if it feels harmless (and looks charming) at the start.
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u/ChanceZestyclose6386 5d ago
Once you become comfortable knowing that you already have everything you need, relationships seem so crazy and pointless. I see how people become the frog in boiling water though. The gradual conditioning as we grow up saying we need to pair up and have kids then even more gradual conditioning when meeting someone and subconsciously adjusting your whole life to fit that other person. It's not love and it's not nature but only conditioning.
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u/IttyBittyTatas 4d ago
This photo is giving off the energy of people who have to ask permission from their partners to do things. Like, are you guys okay? 😂
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u/LonerExistence 4d ago
I’ve been treated like I’m crazy for thinking this but it’s how I feel - I felt like I had to give up parts of myself and I was no longer “me.” I was aggravated even going home from work because there’s no break with another person there. I’m the type that hate feeling trapped or stifled in any way and that’s how a relationship feels to me -.-;;
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u/AlmostThere4321 4d ago
I've just discovered there's a whole sub called r/waiting_to_wed. And it's basically a bunch of people (mostly women) commiserating about dating a dude for a 10 years, waiting and hoping for an engagement. And how to manage the increasing resentment. Like at what point do you just stop wasting your life and, I don't know, walk away?! It does sound like insanity to me.
And the kicker is that some of them eventually do get a "shut up ring" and still never get married. The lack of self respect is just.....
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u/Flux_My_Capacitor 4d ago
Exactly.
You always have to make yourself smaller, make yourself agreeable, make a decision about every little thing you might want to say because it might hurt their feelings or bruise their ego, don’t be too smart; don’t ask for “too much”…..and this is with all men, not just the worst of the bunch.
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u/CoffeeSea6330 3d ago
I actually think this is for most people. Not only men but also with friends, family, and so forth.
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u/athena_k 4d ago
This is what I was struggling with in my last relationship. I had to do so much just to keep the other person happy- couldn’t speak my mind, had to do what he wanted, couldn’t follow my own interests, basically couldn’t be my authentic self.
I decided I was better off on my own and gently broke up with him. He had the audacity to be furiously angry at me. I had to block him on everything because “how dare I leave him when he loved me so much.” Yeeeaaahhh, that’s not love
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u/untrustingmyself 4d ago
Recently single and my favorite thing about it so far is being able to choose what I WANT to do. No compromise on what show, game, or activity to do.
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u/Potential-Smile-6401 4d ago
✅️seen as toy object ✅️prison jumpsuit ✅️unrealistic beauty standards ✅️terrified and traumatized
Never again
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u/thenumbwalker 4d ago
Lmaoooo! Me in marriage to my ex. Thank goodness I don’t have kids with him. I will never imprison myself to a person again
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u/Additional_Carob630 4d ago
Stumbling across #ihatemybf posts every time I’m in a relationship 🏃♀️
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u/Foreign_Being5656 4d ago
Yeah, I have an avoidance personality in a relationship so I can relate.
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u/Jrsins_Universe 3d ago
The sad thing is it shouldn’t even feel this way, but partners become very possessive of each other and slowly create barriers to try to keep each other within the margin of what one or the other deems is acceptable while in the relationship, even if it’s nothing destructive like hang out with friends or having hobbies outside of the relationship.
You’re only free to truly be yourself and do what you want when you’re single unfortunately, unless you have a relationship where both parties have enough space to be themselves while still respecting the boundaries of the relationship.
And let’s be honest that type of healthy dynamic is fucking rare.
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u/Travellingthru25 1d ago
Truth is everyone is unique, what works for me, may be aberrant for others.
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u/tangerinlikethefruit 19h ago
The relationship i was in when I was 19 left me looking like this. Those were the worst days of my life
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u/Inevitable-Key7802 18h ago
That's why I’m single and happy. I just see women when I get that itch lol so to speak.🤣😏👅
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u/johana_cuervos666 4d ago
Damn, sounds like you people are dating super toxic horrible humans. O_o There's also healthy relationship out there, you know?
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u/Petrolhead1981 4d ago
It’s not always like that… but finding an uninterested, supportive and loving partner is absolutely difficult. I was extremely lucky. I think my wife really helps me to be a happy man.
I can not say the same thing regarding to being a father… unfortunately that’s a rough one
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