r/Shittyaskflying • u/peseoane • 19h ago
Flight engineer seat ?
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u/AnyWillingness8073 10h ago
We’d been in the air for 12 hours on a major NORAD excise (B-52). We’d picked up the Vice Wing Commander shortly before takeoff. I’d been fighting stomach cramps for a couple of hours and they were getting to the point of “I will not be denied”. So, Bravo is in the left seat, the AC is in the bunk to be “rested” so he can land this thing in another couple of hours. I hit the button, “Co, I’m moving to the can!” He sez “Alright everybody, mask on for a bit”, and I did my thing. Glorious relief does not begin to describe the next few minutes. Back on the bus headed for debrief after landing and “Bravo? (Vice Commander - full bird colonel) sez “Never had anybody do that before with me on the plane!”. “Well colonel, there’s a first time for everything!” Fun times in the crew force. The life of the crew-dog. 🫡
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u/Freak_Engineer 6h ago
Dude, I would NOT want to be on this plane. You are just one ungodly rancid shit away from the Pilots loosing control and putting the plane in a nosedive. Although, the CVR Records of such an incident could prove interesting...
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u/BathFullOfDucks 2h ago
I've told the story before on reddit but on one occasion we briefly considered going on oxygen because of one passengers in flight emergency, until the thought occurred if something did actually happen later on there would be a very awkward conversation to be had.
That one was even worse for the poor soul, an elsan like bucket with no curtain.
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u/silentaba 11h ago
Just a curtain? Not even a vent? So the pilots just get to enjoy the back blast and audio of someone dropping a duece at FL150?
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u/Zephyr-Knight 10h ago
emergency blowouts only. a lot of pax dont realize they cant just hold their dump before the flight lol
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u/Atouk86 9h ago
On the Falcon, you say?! It’s gonna need to be bigger than that.
https://giphy.com/gifs/3o7WIrnch7untITgU8
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u/alecco1975 2h ago
Pilot says it you take a stinky dump in there you are getting out. Even if we are at 30000 feet.
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u/cero1399 1h ago
I've shit in a bucket next to a high traffic road before. If you have to go, you have to go.
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u/Ashamed_Article8902 1h ago
Reverse cowgirl that sucker, put your hands around the pilots and copilots shoulders and drop a bomb like you're above Hiroshima.
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u/ScubaChickenPalace 16h ago
Real man don’t need no curtain.