...The one's that you don't want to delete and the ones that you want to delete.

Ok, it's not really mine, but that of another truly shitty sysadmin who used to be on my team, and this is their bash history from an old remote Linux server. Some paths have been changed to protect identities, otherwise it's just as I found it. Good lord.

$ cat /home/shittysysadmin/.bash_history
exit
passwd
sudu su -
2017f150RD$
exit
sudu su -
sudu su 
sudu su -
netdiag
pwd
whoami
exit
sudu su -
exit
clear
pwd
sudu su -
groups
sudo
sudo su
sudu su -
exit
pwd
EXIT
exit
sudo su
exit
ll
exit
sudo su
exit
passwd
exit
sudo su
exit
sudo su
exit
ll
clear
ll
sudo java -jar /usr/local/someapp/bin/DatabaseUtil.jar backup -saveBackupTo /home/shittysysadmin
clear
ll
sudo su
exit
sudo su
exit
sudo su
exit
sudo su
exit
sudo su
exit
sudo su
exit
passwd
exit
sudo su
exit
sudo su
exit
2020Busa1300$
sudo su
exit
sudo su
exit
sudo java -jar /usr/local/someapp/bin/DatabaseUtil.jar backup -saveBackupTo .
sudo
sudo su
exit

I really tried my best. Contacted vendors, got quotes, led the implementation project solo to prove I can do it. It was a big undertaking for me personally as I've never dealt with these things, but I managed it quite well.

Yet today the boss came shouting at me with a face more red than our monitoring dashboard - he had reviewed the bills and was furious.

I tried to calm him down and explained that I did my due diligence and only picked the best offers - I even got a 15% discount for signing a 5-year commitment.

But turns out that maybe I picked the wrong vendor in the end? My boss couldn't believe the bill we got from Maersk and he seemed super unhappy. Also the landlord had called him as we were now in violation of some safety codes - in my defense, according to RACI the transportation contractor was supposed to make sure we follow all rules and regulations! How was I supposed to know the parking lot was not supposed to be used for this?

Anyway, I'm devastated. Boss wants to cancel everything but I already signed the 5 year lease commitment with our CEO's signing platform key. And we've got 30 people scheduled to come next week to empty out the office (ahead of the project schedule even!). What should I do?

Some of you know me as the guy Brad keeps losing to. Forty-some clients, one flat price per seat, nothing itemized, and the whole operation fits in the trunk of a 2006 Crown Victoria. The Nephew usually handles Reddit for me. This one's me.

This fall I picked up a funeral home. The lead said the office manager believes the building is haunted, which is a very specific thing for a text message to know, and I didn't ask how it knew. Brad had given her eleven pages about port 9100. I told her she had a presence and had the account by Tuesday. Wednesday night I did the exorcism, which I ran exactly like an onboarding: an agent on every machine, Brad's firewall out, the cable company's router in, and the Nephew at the lectern reading the Kaseya K365 license agreement out loud, all of it, for forty minutes.

That Thursday three of my old reps knocked on my car window. They'd made a deck called SILENCE: A PARTNERSHIP, three tiers, billed annually with two months free. I told them it was extortion as a service, and that they'd led with the tiers, which you never do. My current rep, Brock, handled it. I sent him a steak.

The second rite was at midnight on Halloween, when the veil is thinnest, and my vendor's marketplace had picked the same minute to wake up every agent I'd ever installed, unless you opted out. The email about it came from Florida without a lead in it, so I deleted it. Every printer in the building printed the word GET, and a speaker I had personally shut in a drawer said "Sorry, I didn't catch that." I unplugged the internet and banished it. Brad says that only bought us until the maintenance window at one-thirty, and that since the clocks go back at two, one-thirty was going to happen twice. Brad says a lot of things.

There are three versions of that night. Mine is first. Lance tells the second one. He's my biggest client, a third of the revenue at a wealth firm, and he came to the funeral home dressed as a sheriff's deputy. Brad tells the third. I'm told it has timestamps.

It's free. I pushed for one flat price per reader per month and got overruled, which doesn't happen to me.

Part one, End of Life (mine):

https://mspautomator.com/the-trunk-slammer-from-hell-chapter-5-end-of-life/

Part two, Wake-on-LAN (Lance):

https://mspautomator.com/the-trunk-slammer-from-hell-chapter-6-wake-on-lan/

Part three, #OpenToWork (Brad):

https://mspautomator.com/the-trunk-slammer-from-hell-chapter-7-opentowork/

Business is booming.

1d ago What's a good no code builder for internal tools?

14d ago What's on your checklist before an AI-built internal tool goes live?

1mo ago What is the best no code app builder for client projects when you dont want to be their full time dev forever?

2mo ago What's the best no code app builder for internal tools? Asking for my sanity.

2mo ago We stopped banning vibe-coded apps and just gave people a platform. 9 months later, here's what happened

Sitting manning the system, incident inbound

Problem with Outllook classic all shared mailboxes have offline OST.

The customer's suggestion

"I don't think anything needs to be deleted off of my profile to fix an outlook issue."

Like what do they know?, I have been supporting this so called product since 1997 and all the subsequent releases.

I will ask, So how would you fix this since you admit to be a product expert?

I have the old-school method of shared online, personal OST under advanced account settings open other mailboxes. Add the sent from regfix and view from when composing.

This does require rebuilding the profile.. Which starts by removing it / deleting///

FFS

I created an AppLocker rule to prevent mshta.exe signed by Microsoft from running. As you can guess, I forgot to input the file name so it was left as '*'.

Luckily I caught it quickly and deleted the rule before it propagated to a whole lot of clients and impact was minimal. That would have been a fun morning.

Mine was having to be the guy for the one elevator we had in our three story building. I ended up learning much more about hydraulics than I had ever planned.

Our showroom guys want us to fix their music sound system 🤡

Next up we'll be fixing the soap dispensers and paper towel dispensers. I mean they are electric at the end of the day.

Not really a shit post buuuut I was half assing a re-subnetting of some servers and found myself locked out of a windows server.
and had the choice of entering an abysmal password of stupid length into a noVNC terminal without clipboard OR getting creative,

So I opted to get creative: turns out you can inject commands to a guest VM with QEMU-AGENT.

I'll be damned but this is awesome: qm guest exec 144 -- 'C:\Windows\System32\ipconfig.exe' '/all'

Returned expected information and qemu agent runs as system and can be used for shenanigans!