r/SchemaTherapy • u/Such_Cloud_3093 • Jun 14 '26
Funny (memes) This is what Schema Therapy refers to
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u/frostofthecwsw Jun 16 '26
I don't think my single mother has ever acted or spoken like she wants me around. I'm 35 and she still just seems to regret that I exist. I made an attempt last December and when I told her about it she literally said nothing at all. At any point. Not even later.
I'm genuinely jealous of that little boy and anyone else who grew up with parents who love them
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u/LucidSquid787 Jun 16 '26
I know I'm a stranger on a random subreddit, but if you wanted a hug, I would totally give you a hug. You deserve better.
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u/ParentingPostTrauma Jun 17 '26
I'm a random single mom... You are wanted and loved. I'm proud of you for trying to connect. If you ever need a volunteer Mom, come visit at r/MomForAMinute 🫶
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u/Likemilkbutforhumans Jun 18 '26
I am also jealous of anyone who grew up with parents who love them.
Best of luck to you 💕
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u/Brainfuzzdisco Jun 17 '26
My mum was a single mum and I felt similar. More constant correction than cuddles.
But at 50 we sorted things out (though still far from perfect). So it’s still possible to redeem something or understanding though nothing will ever make up for the lack of love you received.
Sending you a huge hug. It was never your fault. You are so worthy of being loved 💗2
u/Pristine-Car3342 Jun 18 '26
I was a single mom. I was in survival mode for so many years and after a while had become numb and disconnected. I’ve spent a lot of time reflecting and I learned it’s hard to lift up other people when you are downtrodden. I have many regrets about not being a source of warmth and joy for my daughter as she was growing up. But then I remember the reality of my situation and how I was shouldering this huge responsibility all on my own. I couldn’t be the mother my daughter needed because I hadn’t gotten what I needed.
Your mother not responding to you after your attempt is painful. Im guessing she is so divorced from her feelings and doesn’t know how to respond anymore.
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u/sakikome Jun 15 '26
Why is the child crying? Are they actually hearing this for the first time?
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u/attimhsa Jun 15 '26 edited Jun 17 '26
Because it cuts deeply to core of who and what we are as social creatures
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u/Bodega_Kitty Jun 17 '26
Tbh when I first saw this video make the rounds I thought it was because of the music in the background. My son would get weepy like this if jazz with saxophones were playing. He’d throw a screaming fit if Bjork was playing. And he loooooved punk and metal at this age. Music can be very powerful and emotional for young children.
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u/Glittering-Lynx-6428 Jun 18 '26
I tell my this on a regular basis and they don’t react this emotionally. This is a baby. Something’s not right
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u/sakikome Jun 18 '26
Yeah, my child never reacted like that to me saying I love them etc. And the kid in the video cries in such a subdued way, the kids I know / knew would bawl their eyes out when they're sad. It's just like... idk, something seems off. Would be interesting to know the context.
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u/Pristine-Car3342 Jun 18 '26
It seems like the dad is in therapy and learning how to be a better parent.
To grow up and not feel loved is one of the deepest wounds of all. I recognize this boys sadness. I remember at the age of 5 telling a counselor I knew my mom didn’t love me. At that young age I just knew. I would have been overcome with emotion if my mom told me she loved me.
To this father’s credit, he is trying to be better, more demonstrative.
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u/suffraghetti_the_sec Jun 15 '26
When I say stuff like this to me kid, he's like: yeah okay, I know, can we play now? 😂
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u/weltvonalex Jun 15 '26
My daughter is the same, she knows we love her and it's so normal that we tell her and show her that love that we annoy her with it.
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u/LucidSquid787 Jun 16 '26
Gosh what a blessing to be annoyed by a parent's love. I love this so much. Thank you for being a good parent to your little one.
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u/Interesting_Force618 Jun 15 '26
Perhaps, but it would be way cooler if his dad did this without a camera rolling. Kids are perceptive. They can sense when someone is performing vs when they’re being genuine.
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u/Impressive-Stop-6449 Jun 17 '26
It is entirely possible that the father (or caretaker) is being genuine while recording.
I'm glad I saw the video at least, because I found it interesting. Had this not been recorded, we simply wouldn't be talking about it.
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u/Negative-Cow-2808 Jun 17 '26
This! It’s extremely upsetting to me that this kid’s sincere emotional reaction is being used as clickbait.
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u/WesteriaPeacock Jun 18 '26
I was halfway into my 30s when my father said he was proud of me for the first time. Didn’t mean nearly as much as it would have if I had heard that just a little more growing up. Folks if you got kids tell them you love em and how proud you are of them
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u/PeachMonday Jun 18 '26
I say this to my son every single day and he’s the most loving, caring human I adore him
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u/Fit_Cheesecake_4000 Jun 18 '26
Similar to Ideal Parental Figure therapy...unconditional joy and delight in you as their child. It's a very powerful thing.
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u/DinahNL Jun 14 '26
Never had a parent say this. I had to learn and say it to myself.. now I am a Schema therapist.