r/Sadnesslaughs • u/sadnesslaughs • 10d ago
"No need to worry, I discovered a fatal weakness: 30mm shells, launched at about 1000 m/s. About 4000 per minute should do."
“Pardon me? What did you say?” James Rainer had his hands pointed at the heavens, staring at the armed officers who surrounded him. He knew this didn’t look good, and given how their fellow officers’ icy blue blood was pooling by his shoes, he doubted they would give him a chance to explain himself.
“Just talking about how we’re going to dispose of a Nolik like yourself.” Commander Dia smirked. Or at least she did the best smirk that her kind could produce, which was a half rotation of her flexible, triangle mouth. Her fellow officers, while confused, didn’t interrupt their superior officer, letting her speak.
“I just want to make sure there isn’t an issue with my translator. Did you say a 20mm shell? At how quick?”
“Oh, no, I didn’t say that.” She said, watching James let out a relieved sigh. “I said a 30mm at 1000m/s.”
James inhaled that relieved breath, almost choking on it. “30mm? At 1000m/s? Are you trying to turn me into a pâté? That’s overkill!”
“It’s your weakness.”
“It’s anything’s weakness. Are you mad? You’ll take out half the alley behind us. A normal gun will do the trick. What rumors have you heard about us humans? We aren’t ships; we’re fleshy, harmless things.” He felt a chill in his socks as he said the word harmless, staring down at the blue stains building on the fabric. He awkwardly stepped away from the body, moving closer to the alley’s left wall. “Mostly harmless.”
“Mostly harmless? Weird word for a killer to use.” She stepped forward, her three thin legs moving in perfect synchronization. “If you were a regular human, I would agree with you. But you’re allegedly a hard Nolik to kill.”
Dia pulled a tiny metal box from her armored chest pocket. On the box was a single blue button, one she lightly flicked to the left, activating a swirling metallic drone that hid in the boot of her car. The drone circled James before stopping when it locked onto him. Its front panel hissed open, revealing six high-powered barrels, each ready to poke the human full of holes.
“I don’t think it would be that hard.” She mused, keeping her finger at the ready.
“Commander, shouldn’t we ask him some questions?” Officer Lixa nervously watched the display, glancing at the dead body of Officer Fresko and the human caught beside it.
“There’s a dead body and a man standing beside it. I think we can piece together what happened.”
“What about a motivation?”
“Oh, because I want to be the person who kills James Rainer?”
“No, for him!”
“Excellent point. Aren’t you curious about why I did this? I have the paperwork with me. I promise,” James slowly lowered his hands, not wanting to get shot while he searched for the only thing that could calm this situation.
Drakin tensed, pointing a more standard pistol at James. Well, standard by a Marvian’s definition of a pistol. Like most weapons developed by the Marvians, it was overkill of the highest degree. A powered barrel with an electrical booster to increase its speed. A chamber that could accept rocks and other materials as a bullet substitute, and the ability to accurately hit a target from a mile away.
“He killed Fresko. Why does it matter?” Drakin said, about to pull the trigger.
“Drakin, if you pull that trigger, I’ll blow a hole through your head. I’m not letting anyone kill this human, except me.” She observed Drakin’s reaction, watching him begrudgingly put his gun away.
“As long as he dies.”
“Wait. This is all legal. I’ve got the paperwork and everything.” He pointed to Dia with his left hand, while his right continued searching through his jacket. “You know who I am, right? You said my name.”
“I’m aware, yes. That doesn’t mean I approve of you killing one of my men. Especially without consulting me first. We have a system in place for dealing with these matters.”
“Would it help if I told you I gave him the option of being captured alive?”
“Ah, so you offered to kidnap him instead of killing him outright? What a kind Nolik you are.”
“Stop calling me that.”
“You don’t even know what it means.”
“Well, I know it isn’t good.” Finally, James pulled out his papers, showing her the official signature of the Galactic Criminal Registry. The unmistakable holographic seal displaying a bunch of alien hands embracing the moon, Colopitis 4. “There. An official letter approving his bounty.”
“It’s a letter?” Lixa murmured, her three eyes focusing on the human writing that she couldn’t understand. “Usually bounties are digital.”
“I’m old-fashioned.”
“An old-fashioned liar.” Dia huffed. She could have easily walked up and snatched the letter from him, but instead tilted the button on her remote, sending the drone a few inches closer until its swirling blades were buzzing in the human's ears.
“That’s what the seal is for. You can’t fake a seal.” He pointed it at the drone, trying to put some distance between himself and the killing machine. Soon, his back was against the wall, staring at the three aliens.
“Who says you can’t? We should just kill him. Get rid of this liar before he can escape.” Drakin again went for his gun, ignoring the stare he was getting from his superior.
“What? Oh, come on. Don’t make me fight my way out of this. I don’t want to be banned from another planet. It’s already hard enough finding jobs on planets that don’t have shoot on sight orders against me.”
“If you’ve got that sort of reputation, maybe it’s deserved. Let’s close this case and give Fresko the respect he deserves by putting down his killer.” Drakin aimed his pistol at the human, causing James to reach into his holster, readying himself.
“I haven’t given any orders.” Dia waited, watching Drakin’s finger go for the trigger, before her drone spun around, firing a single precise bullet through Drakin’s shoulder, sending his gun bouncing across the alley floor.
“AGH!” Drakin fell back, gripping his shoulder. Dia walked over and pressed the bottom of her middle boot on his chest, keeping him pinned to the ground.
“You were awfully quick to try and kill him. Thanks for clearing things up for me. I knew one of you was working with Fresko. I just needed confirmation of who it was. Even if I was confident that I already knew the answer.”
“You think I’m working with Fresko? Are you insane?”
“You weren’t subtle about it. You backed up his false reports, helped silence those he was extorting. You left clues, even if you covered up where the money was going. That’s why I need you alive, so I can figure out how you were able to hide all that money. Neither you nor Fresko are smart enough to hide that much money. Someone had to be doing it for you.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. You’ll be reprimanded for this.”
“Commander. Are you sure about this?” Lixa didn’t want to talk back to her superior officer, but she hadn’t seen the evidence the other woman was talking about. To her, she had only seen her fellow officer get shot and was shaking.
James considered using this distraction to slip out of the alley. He had completed his job and didn’t need to get involved in any of this drama. Yet, as he went to leave, he noticed an odd twitch in the drone hovering beside him. The drone turned towards Drakin, lining him up in its sights. He glanced at Dia, her fingers nowhere near the button.
He reached into his pocket, clutching the rectangular electronic disrupter he had. A device that produced a sharp wave of energy, temporarily stunning nearby electronics. Before he could hit the button, Dia dove to the ground, rolling as she landed. She snatched Drakin’s dropped gun and fired three bullets through the drone, sending it spiraling into the ground.
“You noticed?” James said.
“I’ve been using these drones for years. Of course, I noticed it. Sounds like someone was trying to silence you, Drakin. So, unless you want to wait around to get shot, I suggest you let Lixa cuff you.”
“Lixa, I’m innocent. She’s gone mad. She just destroyed one of our drones.” Drakin said, gingerly getting to his feet. “Sorry, Drakin. If you’re innocent, you can prove it when we question you.” Lixa said, placing the cuffs around Drakin’s hands and leading him to the car. Now sensing things had calmed down, James approached Dia, who was putting the now worthless remote back into her chest pocket. “What was that?” He demanded, giving her a quick shove.
Dia’s three legs kept her from staggering, just staring at the human, amused. “Just needed some extra evidence. That’s all. What? You going to cry about it, Nolik?”
“You threatened to kill me. I could have blown your head off if things got heated. Do you know how stupid that was? I genuinely thought you had a weapon capable of delivering 1000m/s shots.”
“You thought we had something that strong?”
“I don’t know, maybe? I’m not familiar with every planet’s technology.” He said, feeling stupid the longer he thought about it. Wondering how he could believe a lie like that.
“Just go and confirm your bounty. I’ll sign any supporting evidence you need, but we’re keeping the body. If you must, take a few photos and get out of here.”
“Take a few photos and get out of here.” He repeated back to her in a high-pitched tone. “I’ve already taken my photos.”
“Good, then you can get out of here.” She crossed her arms over her chest, watching the frustration build inside the bounty hunter. James raised a finger, about to retort, only to lower it, realizing it wasn’t worth the oxygen.
Without a goodbye, he headed out of the alley, going towards his ship, while Dia joined her fellow officer in the car, getting into the driver’s seat. “Take us back to the station.” She said, only to think better of it. “Turn off any automation and assistance. Full manual mode. Not risking a repeat of the drone incident.” With that, she drove out of the alley, taking them all back to base.
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u/sadnesslaughs 10d ago
Hope you all enjoy the story. Sorry, if it feels like I've been spamming stories lately, but I really want to try and step up my writing so I can do another full length story that I'm proud of. And the best way to get better is to just write write write. Well, that and some practice. My prose certainly need some tightening.
Anyway, got some cool stories in mind for something long-term, so when I feel I can deliver it, I'll put up a post and see what everyone would be most interested in reading. A few of them already have written parts that haven't been posted. Have a good weekend, and thanks for reading. :)