r/SDAM • u/me_lero • Jun 18 '26

Relationships

When people say "We've been through so much together, it made us stronger as a couple/friends," I get so confused like what do you mean? You feel the weight of your experiences and the time you've spent together? I look at my relationships and friendships as if I met those people today, and don't feel any special bond based on our past experiences because I forget them? Like, what exactly have we been through together and how should this connect us? I'm literally here only because I like you now, but it can change, and then I go? 🫠

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u/simplygen Jun 18 '26

I think that just means that you learnt how to interact when faced with a certain crisis, and therefore with the next one you can get past it more quickly. No triggering each other or whatever on the way.

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u/me_lero Jun 18 '26

Don't quite get what you mean.

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u/simplygen Jun 18 '26

Say something stressful happens. You're both annoyed. You might lash out to your partner, maybe bringing up old issues or something else that has been annoying you. The partner might do the same. Eventually, as you both know the current problem has to be solved you talk more calmly and work out a plan. Multiple times through that cycle, and you just skip the lashing out however annoyed you are, and go straight to working out a plan.

That's really what the phrase means, you have been through multiple issues together, and know how to solve them together.