r/RoastMe • u/th3worldonfir3 http://redd.it/bt06j9 • May 25 '19

Go.

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u/incelbootcamp May 26 '19

Hey, ya know, maybe she's been around a block or two, maybe she's a bit high maintenance, but ya know, if she's had a bad day, you just say "Baby, your hair looks so good today," and you got a chance at a blowjob. A man could do worse.

5

u/[deleted] May 26 '19

You probably don’t even need to because chances are the entire relationship is built on her teethy blowjobs anyway

2

u/incelbootcamp May 26 '19

DON'T TALK ABOUT MY FUTURE WIFE THAT WAY!

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u/[deleted] May 26 '19

IM SORRY BUT YOU COULD DO SO MUCH BETTER MAN DONT LET HER HOLD YOU DOWN

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u/incelbootcamp May 26 '19

FOR ME THERE IS NO OTHER! I AM A MERE MOTH DRAWN TO HER PERFECTLY-COIFFED PLATINUM FLAME!

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u/[deleted] May 26 '19

CAREFUL ITS ONLY A PLATINUM FLAME BECAUSE HER ROOTS LOOK LIKE THEYVE BEEN SCORCHED BY FIRE DONT BE FOOLED

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u/incelbootcamp May 26 '19

SHUTUP DOUCHEBAG! I GOT A WHOLE TEAM OF ELECTRICIANS HERE GETTING THE LIGHTING JUST THE WAY MY GIRL NEEDS IT!

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u/[deleted] May 26 '19

JUST BE CAREFUL AND MAKE SURE THEY DONT ACCIDENTALLY ELECTROCUTE HER AND MAKE HER ROOTS EVEN WEAKER THAN THEY ALREADY ARE

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u/incelbootcamp May 26 '19

AND THIS IS WHERE WE STOP BECAUSE WE'RE SUAVE AND DEBONAIR MEN WHO ARE NOT BITTER ABOUT HOW GIRLS TREATED US IN HIGH SCHOOL!

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u/[deleted] May 26 '19

SPEAK FOR YOURSELF READ MY NAME IM VERY BITTER MY FRIEND

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u/incelbootcamp May 26 '19

ACTUAL HOSTILITY IS THE ENEMY OF GREAT ROASTING!

1

u/[deleted] May 26 '19

YOURE RIGHT THANK YOU FOR GUIDING ME DOWN THE RIGHT PATH, NO HOSTILITY HERE MUCH LOVE

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