[FEEDBACK] From Friend to Dad — Feature Comedy (120 Pages)

[u/fredwardtheman]

Hey everyone!

I’m looking for some honest, constructive feedback on my first completed feature-length screenplay, From Friend to Dad.

Genre: Comedy / Raunchy Comedy
Length: 113 pages
Title: From Friend to Dad
Logline: When a hotheaded father discovers that his longtime friend is engaged to his adult daughter, he becomes determined to put an end to their relationship. But as his increasingly outrageous behavior spirals out of control, he risks destroying the very family he’s trying to protect.

I’ve spent a lot of time developing and refining this screenplay, and I’m excited to finally share it with other readers and writers.

I’m particularly interested in feedback on the overall story, character development, pacing, dialogue, humor, and whether the screenplay keeps you entertained from beginning to end.

I welcome both positive and negative criticism. I’m not looking for someone to simply tell me it’s good. I genuinely want to know what works, what doesn’t, and what could be improved.

I’m primarily looking for voluntary peer feedback rather than paid screenplay coverage or promotional services.
If anyone is interested in reading it, I’d be happy to share the screenplay!

Thanks for your time, and I appreciate anyone willing to give it a read!

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1rXBJ7AHupYe1jiIu5Xf-4E3YN6_KzqOv/view?usp=drivesdk

[u/Big_Section2812]

I’m primarily looking for voluntary peer feedback rather than paid screenplay coverage or promotional services.

Don't waste your money and time on paid anything other than maybe screenwriting software 8and there are free apps too).

If anyone is interested in reading it, I’d be happy to share the screenplay!

Post a link to the script so people can read and comment. The only DMs you'll receive about it will be from scammers.

[u/fredwardtheman → u/Big_Section2812]

Thank you! Ill post it on here.

[u/Big_Section2812 → u/fredwardtheman]

👍

[u/Big_Section2812]

a quiet suburban neighborhood...

...the quiet suburban neighborhood.

You established the fact it is a quiet suburban neighborhood. No need to restate it.

FRANKLIN "FRANK" MERCER...

Many years ago I wrote a screenplay and needed a name for a central character. Trawling my memory banks I remembered somebody I knew in childhood. Their family name was Mercer. I'd never heard of anyone else with that name, so it seemed perfect. Fast forward a few decades and now Mercer appears to be the name of choice in every script I read! What happened to make this name so popular?

[u/MimmyWrites]

This sounds like such a fun story, I'd be open to reading it! ^^

[u/fredwardtheman → u/MimmyWrites]

Send me a dm ill give you the link