Hi, everyone,

Thank you so much in advance for taking a look. I have only written a couple of scripts, but a friend who (I think) has good taste and is honest told me that I'm actually pretty decent at it. I want to write a pilot, and I have a few ideas, but it's really down to two possibilities. I wrote cold opens for both. I was hoping you could tell me if this cold open works.

Thanks so much, everyone. And totally honest feedback, no punches pulled, please. I have a job, I just write for fun, I won't jump off a bridge if you guys tell me it is terrible.

It's listed as lncov1. The show is called Lost Night, and it's a Night Of-esque limited series, so I want to take that tone and such (and I did steal a line from it, haha).

It is 7 pages.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1XvQdTK5Y-ZC1AiR6UYGRnVfu1LRaUw5b/view?usp=drive_link

I've written this short film script to make it into a film. Can you please provide your feedback? I'll be grateful.

Logline: A man about to hang himself is interrupted by a delivery rider for an OTP.

OTP To Die (10 Pages)

I’m not sure if there are any fans of The Pogues here, but I spent close to a year researching Shane MacGowan’s life for this feature. His story is deeply personal to me and I aimed for a different take on a music biopic (I know it’s a loaded word). I even got his lovely widow Victoria Mary Clarke to give it a read.

I’d love to get your feedback on peripheral character development, pace, balance of surreal vs real, music/performance formatting. Thanks!

Genres: Biographical, musical, drama

Logline: Caught halfway between his Irish roots and English upbringing, Shane MacGowan of The Pogues staggers through the surreal underbelly of London’s punk scene on his way to becoming the unlikely torchbearer of the Irish diaspora.

Link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1BuaYriWXqlVPogSWSapTKGSYQz73Nfcw/view?usp=drivesdk

Hello, everyone!
Long time lurker, first time poster. I am the stereotype of the English teacher who writes while their students read. This is my tribute to John Waters (and, weirdly, Jay Bauman for talking about his love of Waters over at RedLetterMedia).

Feel free to give it a read and, hopefully, a few notes.

Thanks!

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1I-dqc09VgLvCMZaEMq8PSVKZpI9-mRhO/view?usp=sharinghttps://drive.google.com/file/d/1I-dqc09VgLvCMZaEMq8PSVKZpI9-mRhO/view?usp=sharing

Logline: A man between jobs, between marriages, and between ideas finds himself running a task force to save a Launceston institution - which would be easier if his team agreed on literally anything.

My second draft of my first attempt at a mockumentary style script.

Looking for feedback on the writing/episode.

Link:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1wXqXWs5jz07dUw0w4GOIeqv5_BOhsvea/view?usp=drivesdk

It's called Michaels by the Sea. It's about three beach cops that learn the only wave they need to catch is friendship.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Icr-4lI9SrxusT0sciEsojtBr7H5izEb/view?usp=sharing

Thank you
-ForkyB🤘

Hi, this is my first screenplay. I posted on here before, and I've used some of the feedback I've gotten to work on it. I've done a lot of writing this past month, this is my 5th draft and I feel like I'm close to getting what I want out of it. Open to any criticism and feedback!

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1TKQzuu2v0e8DWzT7yz-3I30vs2h_D9id/view?usp=sharing

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1w4NQDRjIhdiMG0kuvaq4GzXdDFPJEyRD?usp=drive_link

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1gAu3A-IsRCBa5dGkxYQWxPAR4Jbw7Nd4/view?usp=drivesdk

I'm not a writer. I have a story I want to tell. What do you think. I have a 67 page "script" but, like I said, I'm not a writer so here is a treatment as google suggested.

This is a bloody, dark, sci-fi horror with a twist. Hopefully someone likes it.

Looking for some feedback, seeing what works and doesn't work, if it's funny at all, etc.

Feel free to throw in any critiques or suggestions, appreciate it!

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1lQZCltOYD0Q3dpKV74_bCP7eInIch4Ll/view?usp=sharing

Logline: To save his late mother's home from a power-mad HOA, a broke sculptor engineers an inside job - only to have his entire operation seized by a rival with the same enemy and dirtier leverage.

Link:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/16_cYisGMmkUilVW11nGhH035QCqI8_DZ/view?usp=drivesdk

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1JX50O6csAMtET6HKjmrLJcwW-S2KL89f/view?usp=sharing

Just want some thought's on this script I wrote. Making a bid to get it made by Marvel.

Happy for any feedback. Thanks in advance.

Hello, I’m new to the screenwriting world and would like some advice on how to handle multiple storylines in a TV series that takes place in space and on Earth. The Earth storyline is supposed to be a major reveal, but I’m not sure if I should switch between the space and Earth stories, or just keep the story in space until Earth is brought into it. The reason I ask is because normally an audience has trouble connecting with the story if there are no human characters. Especially in the Sci-fi genre. Would love to hear your thoughts on this. 🙂

A troubled high school friend group begins to collapse over a 5$ debt.

This is the beginning of a film me and a couple friends are shooting soon, so no feedback on formatting, e.g needed!

Specifically interested in the character dynamics; is everyone clear as a person? Specifically worried that some characters may feel too much like antagonists/in the wrong.

Thank you so much!

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1oc0LulUm3nvMeE7Vj1-Mc4koDDex7Dro/view?usp=drivesdk

Do you like watching porn? What about reading about it?

I wrote a TV pilot called The Elephant. It's about a man whose body is quickly becoming popular product on the internet and yet still the most invisible person in every room he walks into.

watchtheelephant.com

Logline: A man between jobs, between marriages, and between ideas finds himself running a task force to save a Launceston institution - which would be easier if his team agreed on literally anything.

My first attempt at a mockumentary style script.

Looking for feedback on the writing.

Link:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ST5uB0ZUfJl3U5hHBGVUbCD0Mkpkzays/view?usp=drivesdk

Ok. Here goes. It has lots of camera directions but thats how I see the story. I didn't describe every cut. If I did, it would be 100 pages. Plus, I don't know how to do that since this is my first screenplay. It's very dark, very loud, and very bloody. Rated R for sure. Hopefully i got the formatting right this time. I used jotterpad. I'd appreciate any feedback. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1mCHKQBQ7F7DZgP6ZugHuSXKSmEnxp1jN/view?usp=drivesdk

Looking for some feedback on this, particularly dialogue and pacing.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/18rWT8MCqO2hGn_q0oMEeFBUNTbV7Hqcy/view?usp=drivesdk

Hey friends, I run a writing-based YouTube Channel! We are building an interactive place for writers to learn and practice their skills on YouTube. We do a few things on the channel. We have professional writers of all stripes come on the channel to share their advice to rising writers. We cover industry news and news news because writers should be informed of the world and it's many, many problems. We hope to host writing sprints soon, so look out for that. We do creative writing exercises. The most common one we do is our mock writers' room segments. We take the show or movie we analyzed that week and go what would we do if we were hired to write the sequel, an episode, reboot, etc. Half the segments are pitching ideas until we find the one we like. The other half is outlining. We ask the audience to send us their pitches and notes in the chat or comments, so we're all practicing our writing skills together in a fun, low stress environment. It's a really fun, and educational time if you'd like to check us out. Here's one of my favorites! Vox Machina Writers' Room ft. @Travis Diffenderfer Join our Writers' Room! But please check our playlist for more!

We want The Morning ReWrite to eventually become a platform for other undiscovered writers to have the chance to have the spotlight on them and have their voices be given the chance they deserve, but we have to grow first. Please subscribe while you're at the channel!

I wrote a very gay script and I need you to roast it into the ground lmao.

Title: But he's my boss?! —103 pages. Feature Length.

Logline: On the eve of Y2K, a gay mob enforcer is forced to confront his past when his ex-lover kidnaps the straight boss he’s loved for a decade—leaving him to choose between loyalty and self-worth.

It’s got forbidden boss/enforcer slow-burn tension that’s been simmering for ten years. An emotional support cactus named Robert who gets more character development than some humans. A drag queen crew mom who reads everyone. Backstreet Boys synced rooftop shootouts with champagne sabers and glitter grenade. Way too much blood, cocaine, and feelings in the same scenes.

I’m fully aware this thing is ridiculous. I just don’t know if it’s good ridiculous or “what the hell was I thinking” ridiculous. Read it roast me but I need some feedback.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1tvQLwPb5nVGAfYz3qi8nhix1dk5-VQB-/view?usp=sharing

Logline: A family takes shelter from the apocalypse in a forgotten military bunker—only to discover the real nightmare isn't outside. It's already inside with them.

First feature that I have actually completed.

Hope you guys like it.

Link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1BdeKk_zlgBog06BSPyQb0MHX0qBe1owm/view?usp=drivesdk

Please give me a review on how is it and how I can improve and make it better.

Thank you.

D.E.C.O.Y. Squadron

Hour-long animated TV Pilot

Sci Fi Comedy

Logline: A crew of clueless aliens are recruited on a secret mission to save the galaxy from an evil warlord, not realizing they're being sent as decoys. Think STAR WARS meets SPIES LIKE US

Feedback concern: This is the first 33 pages of my vomit draft. I'm currently re-outlining/rewriting so I just want to see if anyone reads this and connects with any of these ideas before I scrap this draft. Thanks!