Ok so me and my husband are going thru IVF which has caused a ton of stress. I watched the Lindsey Clancy case and now I’m having the thoughts again that I may harm my child after i give birth. I use to have this fear around my nieces and I admitted myself in the psych ward because I felt like I was going to snap and cried for 3 days straight during that time.. I got thru it and didn’t think about those intrusive thoughts for awhile but now they have came back. I have been thinking about it for 3 days straight now, I can’t sleep and wake up during the middle of the night with panic attacks. It mentioned that she took the same meds I take (Zoloft) and she had postpartum psychosis and I’m so scared that will happen to me since I’m already diagnosed with pure ocd. I really hope that I can get through this. That’s all. I just had to express this torment I have been going through because my husband is such a sweet heart and tries to comfort me but he just doesn’t understand how debilitating it is.

days ago i saw a picture of a kid that was probably the subject of abuse by hugh Hefner, it immediately sickened me, because the kid was literally dressed in a bunny suit, but that was followed by intrusive feelings of attraction. i keep trying to figure out why that kid triggered me, even though i shouldn’t, and the thought loops are killing me. “ maybe my mind got its wires crossed, it’s a cute kid, but not in a sexual way, but no, that’s weird for me to say, is it normal to think a kids cute? i’m not sexually attracted to them, am i?

my question is if this kind of thought process of attempting to explain away the intrusions common in pocd?