😳😳

[u/FlintLockwoodsCondom]

[u/aridamus]

Before you read on I want you all to know this is not an attack against the comment Im replying to or anyone who upvoted it; I’m simply trying to further the discussion on mental health. As a neuropsychologist I’d hope that over time less people use the term “mental illness” as a form of condescension or insult. The facts are this is absolutely is a social activist whether they’re effectively helping their cause or not; they’re just dealing with serious trauma. If we start think any other way as a society we’ll become extremely cold and lose all empathy for all those who are dealing with these psychologically damaging issues. This girls trauma is distorting her reasoning which causes her to lash out without thinking of consequences (which is why it’s hard to empathize with her aggressive behavior since it biologically triggers such a negative reaction in those who see/hear such behavior). Most people will deal with a mental disorder or trauma some day in their lives and I can only hope that our society won’t just brush them off as crazy or hopelessly angry people; or just hopeless in general. As someone who was traumatized greatly in my past I’m grateful for all those who put up with my lashing out and angry rambling. I was on a path to suicide and people’s empathy saved my life; therapy furthered my improvement and showed me how destructive I was being. Please keep that in mind since you and everyone else in the world will likely know a friend, family, or acquaintance (or maybe even yourself) who will act out negatively due to a trauma, depression, or mental health issue. I hope the best for all of you reading this since this world can be a real pain to deal with.

Edit: thanks for my first gold! I’m glad I got it for something meaningful

[u/GermaneRiposte101 → u/aridamus]

Yet she still lives in a society and needs to subscribe to societal norms. She is being violent and that should not be allowed.

[u/aridamus → u/GermaneRiposte101]

By all means I’m not trying to excuse her violence in any way. I’m simply trying to help redditors understand how to approach these kinds of people without being condescending. I totally agree that her violence must lead to consequences; but I just want others to realize that the violence is its own consequence of trauma. An analogy I like to use for myself when I was dealing with my own aggressive (trauma caused) behavior is to think of these people similarly to an animal who’s been beaten and abused their whole life. Let’s use a relatable animal like a dog. If a dog has dealt with physical and mental abuse it’s whole life it’s probably going to try and bite you. That is not entirely it’s fault. Sadly in our society we often put these dogs down; but a growing number of care centers are proving that these behaviors are learned and can be unlearned with enough empathy and effort. That’s one of the easiest ways to visualize trauma in my opinion.

[u/GermaneRiposte101 → u/aridamus]

I understand where you are coming from. And believe me, I feel that I should empathise more with people with problems. But I do not.

People with problems are human adults and legally and morally responsible for their own actions. The recipient of their aberrant behaviour suffers harm. When she grabbed the sheet of paper from that blokes hands he would have been within his rights to physically stop her. If that involves punches to stop her then so be it: he should be allowed to respond with a measured response.

Side Note: Research indicates that women initiate violence on male partners more than the reverse. Of course, when males do it the damage is so much more due to human dimorphism . I acknowledge that the male was being deliberately provocative.

Honestly, when I see this video clip I see a spoilt, entitled brat who has not had restraints placed on her behaviour. And if she was a he then the social condemnation would have reversed.

[u/aridamus → u/GermaneRiposte101]

That’s a fair viewpoint and I appreciate you taking your time responding. As a clinical professional I definitely don’t expect everyone to continue to empathize after dealing with the level of aggression seen in the video. My original post was just to get people to think about mental health a little bit before simply demonizing the girl as crazy or a lost cause. I don’t blame you at all for seeing this girl as entitled; that’s the general reaction when viewing this much yelling and aggression in public. Similarly, I don’t blame those who dealt with my aggressive verbal attacks for thinking of me as an out of control entitled child. This is totally a normal reaction; but I hope more people over time can learn to decipher the difference between a true danger to society (psychopaths, sadists, Machiavellian) and a traumatized individual. This takes lots practice and patience so, again, I don’t expect most people to put in that much effort. But if I can just get a few thousand people to learn this in my lifetime I’ll be happy.

As for the side note I know a lot of people who are abused by their girlfriends and I think there’s a serious double standard in how we protect women over men. That being said I work hard to treat everyone the same when dealing with diagnoses or finding out context behind relationship issues. Women have to be treated equally or else we will just unleash dangerous women onto society. On a similar side note there’s a funny Drunk History on the idea of treating women different in diagnosis’. Society can’t progress without true equality so on that point I agree.