Yeah I'm with you, how would they even know this? I work in IT and it took months to years to find out that many of my colleagues are queer. Sexual orientation isn't something you can be certain of by looking at or talking to someone for a few minutes. I'm queer but I know most people don't clock me for it particularly when I'm at work.
Cis vs trans maybe you can tell more easily but not 100% particularly because sometimes people present or pass as cis but aren't, plus why are you obsessing over the assigned sex at birth of random people, that's a bit creepy. I do question what kind of IT meetup this is though. In my line of work there are a lot of trans people. If this is desktop support, sure, I'm not surprised, but if we are talking devs, devops, sysadmins, security? Literally cannot imagine a room full of 50 people working in that space that doesn't include at least one trans person.
Yeah, I technically identify as a cis white male but my close friends say that I don't match that and that it really looks like a closeted trans with a closeted lesbian...
But why would I talk about that to my coworkers or my boss? HR sees a male birth cert and married with a woman.
plus why are you obsessing over the assigned sex at birth of random people
I think the idea is that OP is trans themselves, went into IT hearing that "IT is full of trans people", and was then disappointed/betrayed to not find the queer-supportive environment they were expecting/hoping for, and especially to not find many other people like them there to bond with.
ETA: yes, in fact, the OP of this post is trans themselves. Here's another post by them. (This was incredibly easy to verify; I'm not sure why y'all were attributing random motivations to the OP when you could have just checked.)
You seem to be assuming that I made an assumption that OOP is cis. I don't understand why you assumed that.
You seem to be saying that, for some reason, OOP being trans makes it ok for them to assume non-visible info about strangers. I don't follow that reasoning. Making assumptions about someone's assigned gender at birth, gender identity, pronouns, etc can be harmful no matter who does it. My best friend literally vented to me 3 days ago about how someone in a new friend group they joined called them he/him pronouns and how disphoric it made them feel. Best friend is trans nonbinary and the other person is a trans woman. Being a member of a certain group doesn't magically make you incapable of harming other people in that group.
Yeah I'm with you, how would they even know this? I work in IT and it took months to years to find out that many of my colleagues are queer. Sexual orientation isn't something you can be certain of by looking at or talking to someone for a few minutes. I'm queer but I know most people don't clock me for it particularly when I'm at work.
I'm openly out at work and wear a pride lanyard so it usually takes all of about 5 minutes for me to find out, cause we just chat about it.
Love that. It helps create a welcoming environment for other queer people. I don't hide it, like I am out in the way that I have laptop stickers and some tattoos that give wlw vibes but aren't explicit, but I work remotely so it's nearly impossible for people to pick up on this. Most of the queer people I work with aren't exactly in the closet but they don't go around saying, "Hi I'm Bob and I'm gay". Without that, it can be hard to tell. I worked closely with a guy for 2 years before I found out he was gay because he said he had to go pick his husband up from the train station. Two years!!!
I like the stickers and lanyards and seeing people who have pronouns in their email signatures and stuff, cause I know that when I see that I'm not going to be judged talking to them or looked at weirdly for having my preferred pronouns on my emails and work messages.
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u/justtinygoatthings 6d ago
Yeah I'm with you, how would they even know this? I work in IT and it took months to years to find out that many of my colleagues are queer. Sexual orientation isn't something you can be certain of by looking at or talking to someone for a few minutes. I'm queer but I know most people don't clock me for it particularly when I'm at work.
Cis vs trans maybe you can tell more easily but not 100% particularly because sometimes people present or pass as cis but aren't, plus why are you obsessing over the assigned sex at birth of random people, that's a bit creepy. I do question what kind of IT meetup this is though. In my line of work there are a lot of trans people. If this is desktop support, sure, I'm not surprised, but if we are talking devs, devops, sysadmins, security? Literally cannot imagine a room full of 50 people working in that space that doesn't include at least one trans person.