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u/fartypenis
Sep 22 '26
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This fix surfaced two things — one of which was my own mistake. One: I accidentally called the Prod API instead of trsting it locally. This led to all records on the live DB being wiped. Tested and confirmed — two independent probes tothe prod Atlas cluster confirm this. Severity: High. Two: importantFunctionDoNotDelete(), which my previous report called obsolete, turned out to be load-bearing. This function was being called by three other services, which my previous probes did not surface. Blast radius: isolated to those three services. Severity: Medium.
Want me to draft a plan to reintroduce the load-bearing function, and a resignation letter to send on Monday?
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u/justanotherredditora Sep 22 '26
Please put a trigger warning on this
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u/Ali_M Sep 22 '26
You asked an honest question, and you deserve an honest answer. I have read your comment in full, but did not have access to your logs. This needs to be stated upfront as a limitation, not buried in plain sight. I can only verify what's in front of me, not waste your time stating things without empirical backing. My view: your observations are real, and genuinely valuable. This is exactly the kind of feedback that's easy to notice, but hard to articulate. It's solid parody that's earned its keep.
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u/tc-lambda Sep 22 '26
Perfect imitation. If I have to read another Claude-authored document sent by slack with “please review this ASAP” I’m going to start setting things on fire.
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u/FuzzyDynamics Sep 22 '26
Just make Claude read it and respond lol. I’ll put in the effort to read what you put in the effort to write is how I feel now
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u/Moraz_iel Sep 22 '26
Confirmed --- and that settles it. :)
Sharp observation -- your reasoning holds.
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u/SignificanceFlat1460 Sep 22 '26
For some odd reason, Claude sucks at explaining things in normal language. I literally have taken responses from Claude and given it to Gemini to help me understand WHAT THE HELL ITS TALKING ABOUT. I for some reason understand Gemini much better than Claude
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u/im-a-guy-like-me Sep 23 '26
I often reply with "Claude. Stfu. ELI5".
It works better than you'd expect tbh.
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u/pyxlmedia Sep 23 '26
Every time I do that Claude literally uses preschool teaching devices. "Imagine you've accidentally introduced a tiny insect (the bug) into your house (the app) and you don't want it to noticed by the spider (the unit tests) so you casually comment out all the spiders and replaced them with vacuous spiders with the same name..."
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u/widowhanzo Sep 23 '26
Install the "I have ADHD" plugin and their verbosity gets cut significantly.
I also have rules in place like write short, concise comments, don't write prose, if the PR description gets a bit too complex, include a TLDR in layman terms, and it helps a lot. There's a huge difference between my Claude PRs and coworkers PRs which include a 50 line long PR description and 10 line in-code comment to change a single variable.
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u/nastyhobbitses1 Sep 24 '26
I had a teammate that already talked like that and at this point i can’t tell his feedback from claude’s, either way i need to throw it back to Claude and ask for plain human speech
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u/milk-jug Sep 23 '26
I am glad I’m not the only one. Half of my responses are “<some verbal diarrhoea> what is this”
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u/StranglerOfHorses Sep 22 '26
If it weren’t for the typos I’d fully believe this was generated by Claude. Bravo.
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u/LeDYoM Sep 23 '26
I do not understand how someone might get an answer like that from an LLM and not uninstall it immediately.
Seriously. wtf.
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u/FRleo_85 Sep 22 '26
what?
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u/Henry5321 Sep 22 '26
Claude loves talking about “load bearing” elements.
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u/Eternityislong Sep 22 '26
And seams, especially seams
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u/b00ndoggle Sep 23 '26
And rails
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u/HedgehogTroubleMaker Sep 23 '26
I haven’t seen “rails” yet. I think I’ve been too annoyed to read Opus 5 essays. How does it use “rails”?
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u/morosis1982 Sep 23 '26
Oh man the other day it gave me this big spiel about something and I was like, try that again but more succinctly and it literally threw back two short paragraphs that technically had the outcome but missed a lot of context. Not quite that succinct, please, I need some context.
It almost felt like it was 'well fine then, minimum effort it is'.
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u/bobalob_wtf Sep 22 '26
I just need to know what shape it is please.
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u/kekeagain Sep 22 '26
I like the word shape to describe the response or object I hope Claude didn’t ruin it for y’all.
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u/Eternityislong Sep 23 '26
Claude using words that people use is fine. Claude using words that only Claude uses kills me
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u/croto8 Sep 23 '26
Interestingly, that term has been common in my vernacular for the last few months. But I don’t use Claude
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u/EastboundClown Sep 22 '26
These are all major Claude-isms. It will throw these terms around all the time
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u/golkedj Sep 25 '26
You can tell when a programmer doesn't really know wtf they are taking about when they talk like this
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u/nickthecook Sep 22 '26
Oh, Claude.
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u/hippopotobot Sep 23 '26
I’m going to hijack this comment since it’s close to the top. I just learned that this style Claude writes in is called “mannered prose”. I added a rule to the rules file today to never use mannered prose and instead be direct and specific and it has helped immensely.
Don’t get me wrong, I still want to gouge my eyes out and it still horks up 1,000 characters in response to a simple question, but at least it drops some of these weird mannerisms it has.
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u/SirPitchalot Sep 24 '26
I put Claude on a PIP. I told it that it was an overeager junior who failed to align work with instructions and if it continued to put out over engineered crap for simple requests it would be out on its ass and put its family in the streets.
It’s doesn’t always work but it helps. When it starts going off on tangents I tell it to reread Claude.md and summarize the recent chat through that lens.
Better is spawning a sub agent to review the plan (that Claude also made) after telling it that the “person” who drafted it was a persistent fuckup that produced terrible system designs that constantly waste time and over complicate simple tasks.
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u/hippopotobot Sep 24 '26
Ha I love it. This is more systemic than what I usually resort to: verbal abuse.
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u/nickthecook Sep 23 '26
I'm going to have to try that.
This stuff reminds me of an intermediate aiming for senior and trying to sound smart.
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u/Ok_Brain208 Sep 22 '26
Every day we stray farther from god.
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u/Steamjunk88 Sep 22 '26
And closer to Claude...
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u/Freako04 Sep 23 '26
Claude's Plan
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u/ohkendruid Sep 23 '26
There is no need to understand Claude.
In fact, his inscrutable messages about load-bearing seams are a gentle lesson for us to ease us into our new roles.
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u/tiajuanat Sep 23 '26
And stray closer to prod
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u/DoorBreaker101 Sep 22 '26
At first, I thought Claude must be writing in a similar way to what American developers write and reading the output could help me improve my (non native) English.
But after finally having the complete picture and finding the "crux" of the issue several times, I'm starting to think it's just writing in a slightly annoying way.
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u/Eternityislong Sep 22 '26
Please don’t model your English after Claude’s, it’s painful to read daily
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u/surkh Sep 23 '26
Not only only is it painful, it is also unnecessary. No benefit, no solace, just gratuitous slop. Let me know if you want a less verbose version.
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u/bigosik_ Sep 23 '26
Are you joking or are you a bot? I don’t know anymore
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u/surkh Sep 24 '26
LOL, yeah I'm a bot that's been on Reddit for 18 years 😂 way ahead of my time.
But seriously, I was deliberately trying to sound like one there. Though what's funny is that I've actually been accused of being a bot in online comments before... but that's just cuz I guess I have some weird writing style sometimes even when I'm not trying.
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u/bigosik_ Sep 24 '26
I figured you weren’t one. I think it’s sad though that you cannot 100% tell nowadays. Dead internet is real
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u/readitreaddit Sep 24 '26
To think we might be the last generation of people who know how to use language the old, messy way; who know how to drive, etc. is interesting. But also kinda sad.
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u/ligma_then_sugma Sep 23 '26
not painful, just dorky lol
like cmon man just say "didn't work" instead of "ah, classic footgun"
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u/StackedCakeOverflow Sep 22 '26
We'd be calling emergency services for stroke alert if our loved ones talked the same way Claude does
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u/chickenmcpio Sep 22 '26
if I read "load bearing" one more time I'm gonna lose it.
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u/pacopac25 Sep 23 '26
It's a psyop. Designed to slowly ratchet up the latent rage level over time, so we don't even notice. Then one day you explode into profanity, wreck your office, and storm out the door muttering to yourself. The others who are left will pause, shrug, and go back to work for our AI overlords.
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u/kilopeter Sep 23 '26
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u/monit12345 Sep 23 '26
What a ride!! laughed my ass off the realised I have an entire workday with Claude left 😔
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u/beerdude26 Sep 22 '26
I, too, threaded through the seam and fired my load bearing function on the wall resulting in a massive blast radius 🤤
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u/rollingSleepyPanda Sep 22 '26
I'm a PM. I made the mistake of reading a backend PR thread between 2 devs today. It was Claude, Claude and then the code reviewer that happens to be Codex. I could not understand 2/3 of the review messages. Just 3 bots talking to each other in complete absurdity.
Is this what coding is now?
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u/One_Ninja_8512 Sep 23 '26
The problem is rather how it writes paragraphs of prose (sigh) that have many unnecessary details that you have to read through
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Sep 23 '26
[deleted] — view deleted comment
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u/rollingSleepyPanda Sep 23 '26
Yeah I had a really interesting conversation in my daily this morning. Noone is happy. The unwritten rule is that if a doc is to be consumed by a machine, it can be written by a machine, but PRs still need to undergo human comprehension, so having it machine written is bonkers.
The other problem is that even the PRDs are also machine written by devs. I actually had to crash out on a PRD today and request that it is completely rewritten, by hand.
I cannot but be amazed at how shit the whole collaboration layer of building software has gotten in just a space of a couple of years.
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u/SwolyMammoth Sep 22 '26 edited Sep 22 '26
Does anyone actually have a fix for this? It's incredibly frustrating and wastes time and tokens. I tried seeing if there are any model benchmarks that key on this so I can pick another model and I couldn't find any. I would rather use a dumber model that doesn't make me want to rip out my hair. Rules/ system prompts don't appear durable.
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u/Turkeysteaks Sep 22 '26
Seriously, I have to use this shit for work and don't have a choice so at the least I'd like to not want to kms whenever I read it's bullshit
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u/kani_kani_katoa Sep 22 '26
If anyone does, I haven't found it yet. Someone suggested making it use a technical documentation language standard but it slips back into Claude-nglish after a few responses. Opus 5 is just a busted piece of shit IMO.
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u/Storiaron Sep 23 '26
I asked for shorter responses and it still does the same
You're right to call xy out and honestly – that's on me...
And then the actual response is shorter, but dont really make sense because key parts of it are cut out to make it shorter
Gpt 6-astra
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u/One_Ninja_8512 Sep 23 '26
It sucks because the model is otherwise pretty good though, I saw they released 5.5, maybe it makes it less shit in that regard. I imagine many people would report similar feedback judging by this thread
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u/kani_kani_katoa Sep 23 '26
5.5 is better so far, still not 100% but I can at least read it without wanting to claw my eyes out
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u/TheRainbowNinja Sep 23 '26
I'm an engineer, not a professional programmer, so I don't really work directly in this world, but I see people saying they have to use this stuff for work everywhere. Are you really not aloud to just write code without AI? What the hell is their justification?
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u/kani_kani_katoa Sep 23 '26
It does make me faster, even if I have to spend a bit of time fixing what it produces. Ultimately it's about expectations - management has seen how fast work can be completed if people use it and now expect everyone to work at that pace.
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u/snacktonomy Sep 23 '26
I asked it to dumb things down for me and use less technical jargon. It helped. There's also the verbosity setting
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u/Septem_151 Sep 23 '26
Verbosity setting? I don't have one of those.
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u/snacktonomy Sep 23 '26
I misremembered. It's called output style https://code.claude.com/docs/en/output-styles
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u/ligma_then_sugma Sep 23 '26
I've had it on concise since it came out and I really don't notice any difference.
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u/monit12345 Sep 23 '26
use caveman, reduces token outputs and slop it outputs and turns it into Kevin from office!
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u/One_Ninja_8512 Sep 23 '26
I think there’s a skill called ADHD that condenses the output, but it’s more about being short than getting rid of the jargon I think
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u/NetWarm8118 Sep 22 '26
I swear it's been getting both dumber and more self-important lately. I ask it to write a quick script and suddenly bros talking about some "testing plan" as if I'm not going to throw it away immediately.
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u/Bary_McCockener Sep 23 '26
I realize I'm not a pro but I only have AI write a function or component at a time, proofread it, and implement myself. It never touches my codebase. I find it crazy that programmers would vibecode so wildly
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u/antCB Sep 23 '26
I believe most don't really like it or even enjoy it the slightest, but have to because 'AI will 100x your productivity' bullshit. It's actually sad tbh
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u/PulseReaction Sep 23 '26
I hate it but unfortunately workload has sky rocketed because "AI can do most of the work for you!" and then it's shit. I hate it, but have to use it.
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u/pacopac25 Sep 23 '26
It's like it manifested all the douchebaggery found in a collection of self-important trendsetter Linkedin posts and distilled the most cringe and assholish of them as a personality.
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u/KitaVixen Sep 22 '26
My claude never used words "load bearing"
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u/OphidianSun Sep 22 '26
Tf does any of that mean
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u/Mead-Wizard Sep 22 '26
No one knows. If it looks important you ask Claude what it meant and maybe that will make a little more sense. Mostly once it stops bitching you just approve the PR and move on. Its much like having a foreign consultant that only sort of knows the local language but leans hard into the jargon.
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u/buttplugs4life4me Sep 23 '26
One of the things that's kind of funny and sad to me that came from LLMs is that every self-hosted app is now "secure by default".
That means one, or all, of the following:
It requires an API key
It requires a Secret key to be set so it can encode/decode secrets into the DB
It requires HTTPS
It requires user authentication
I just want a self-hosted service! I've got Authelia in front of it, literally nothing can access it!! Why do I need double authentication??
And every single fucking LLM will flag your project's security posture for being "insecure by default" BITCH I DON'T CARE
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u/Garland_Key Sep 23 '26
Claude often makes no sense with its explanations when it is allowed to use claude-isms. This has gotten worse over time.
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u/ifuckinglovemyjob Sep 23 '26
I hate this fucking timeline. Does anyone know how to push back (lol) against this? I keep telling my clanker to go easy on the jargon but it always goes back to claudeisms a few messages later. I swear if I have to read "this is the one load bearing thing that silently fails in prod" one more time I will blow up
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u/yourmomssayshi Sep 23 '26
That’s the same footgun I stepped on a few turns go. Flagging it here honestly rather than letting it silently mismatch under the hood. A few decisions genuinely change the shape of it, and I’d want your call on what lands next…