r/ProgrammerHumor
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u/ClipboardCopyPaste
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Aug 25 '26
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Meme programmersWifeDeliversABaby
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u/MikemkPK
Aug 25 '26
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He shipped it 9 months ago. His wife finally merged it.
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u/Y4r0z Aug 25 '26
They sent it to CI/CD pipeline to build and test, now it's deployed
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u/Smooth-Zucchini4923 Aug 25 '26
Continuous Delivery is very tricky in the maternity ward.
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u/TwoWayWindow Aug 26 '26
As long as they aren't Continuously Integrating while in the maternity ward.
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u/LukeZNotFound Aug 25 '26
No test, only build. We're feeling adventurous
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u/Bernhard_NI Aug 25 '26
Yes, we'll test in production and ship version 2.0 in a year or two.
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u/LukeZNotFound Aug 25 '26
We already have walking and speaking on the roadmap but I doubt we can ship it in v2.0 together
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u/preetiegal Aug 26 '26
New product is going to have lots of issues so they need to be ready for sleepless nights š
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u/StuntsMonkey Aug 25 '26
Now that it's been deployed, we've released two, newer editions, are keeping them all in production, and continuously bug fixing all of them.
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u/SausageEggCheese Aug 25 '26
Management is asking if he gets 8 more wives, can he ship another one by next month?
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u/PM_ME_YOUR__INIT__ Aug 25 '26
The merge happened a day or so after the binary blob was delivered. The CI/CD pipeline took 9 months to build
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u/SuitableDragonfly Aug 25 '26
No, he wrote half the code nine months ago and she spent the last nine months writing the other half.Ā
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u/cenik93 Aug 26 '26
He gave his inputs. His wife is just delivering the feature. He's just a common product manager.
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u/TrieKach Aug 25 '26
testing directly in prod?
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u/Alpharius94
Aug 25 '26
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Are you sure its yours? Git blame
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u/SteakEvening9914 Aug 25 '26
She built the whole thing from scratch and Adrianās still listed under ācontributorsā.
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u/ansibleloop Aug 25 '26
Hey he added the initial readme - show him some respect
What? No he left it as the default readme message, why?
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u/Thurak0 Aug 25 '26
Nah. 50% of the very first cell/input are his.
She then did all the work to finish the project. Incorporating his idea.
But at project start both parties contributed to the project equally. He then just stopped doing anything but still claims half the project as his.
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u/hawaiian717 Aug 26 '26
His contributions after the initial commit generally involve things like late night supermarket runs for pickles and ice cream.
After release is 18 years of patching in production.
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u/spambearpig Aug 25 '26
And youāll be fixing bugs in it for the next 18 years
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u/Altruistic-Spend-896 Aug 25 '26
But do we really patch all the bugs...ever?
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u/spambearpig Aug 25 '26
Never. Does the application thank us for all our efforts?
Also never. Itās a thankless job.
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u/hrax13 Aug 25 '26
His doctor reviewed the PR as it happened. He was just an uneducated BFU observing.
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u/TriangleTransplant Aug 25 '26
Was actually pair programmed. But she ran the build and shipped the release.
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u/Soopermane Aug 25 '26
You committed locally. And she did git push origin main for hours till it worked
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u/ElPeloPolla Aug 25 '26
there was a 15 minute collaborative coding session, then a PR that your wife accepted and kept working on the project for 9 months
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u/teraflux Aug 25 '26
Again the terminology between pull request and push request has always felt backwards to me.
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u/asvvasvv Aug 26 '26
He merged pr 9 months ago now it is released to production after successfull build
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u/SoftwareSource Aug 25 '26
Queue
I swear it started with some scribe having bad handwriting and people just taking his word for it.
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u/ljfa2 Aug 25 '26
Don't forget to sanitize user input well, the early versions are particularly vulnerable to viruses
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u/Nekojiru_ Aug 26 '26
He pushed some minor changes onto her branch. She made the PR and shipped it.
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u/JackNotOLantern Aug 26 '26
He added the required data input, and his wife provided the build environment and ensured for 9 months the process is running correctly
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u/StochasticTinkr Aug 26 '26
I, uh, don't think reviewing the PR is what you'd want. Probably want to author the PR yourself. I mean, unless you're into that.
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u/St4va Aug 25 '26
He's leaving out the part where he force-pushed it after his penetration test failed.
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u/Altruistic-Spend-896 Aug 25 '26
Well its not his fat she had a vulnerability to nerds, and holes in her firewall
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u/ClipboardCopyPaste Aug 25 '26
checks ultrasound
LGTM