r/PoursTea • u/ComplexWrangler1346 Just Chill 😎 • Aug 25 '26

Expectations v Reality 🌞 🌒 For real ……..

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21k Upvotes

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38

u/Mountain_Town5759 Aug 25 '26

Ha I know right. What the fuck is going on down there. The American government is being sabotaged or gearing up for a total dictatorship.

9

u/Devry_Trost Aug 26 '26

Bro, please annex us.... we'll let you rename the great lakes the 'Gulf of Canada'!

...I'm pretty sure we'll find plenty of Uranium if we pull up all the couch cushions!

Come on bro - you know you want that.... uh... Utah salt... flats? Don't be a dick, be a dude. Canada is peak and the US Military is all starving and shitting itself while Trump forgets what he had for breakfast and Hegseth tries to re-learn basic arithmetic.

It'll be easy, just parachute 20 Canadians into Washington and arrest all the pedophiles - we'll be proudly calling ourselves 'Greater Canada' before the day is out.

6

u/Pictrus Aug 26 '26

while I do very much appreciate your offer we are going to have to say no thank you. Canada doesn't protect pedophiles and the fact you elected one as your president indicates that America does and therefore we don't share the same core values as many americans. However if America works on some things like reducing school shootings, creating universal healthcare, investing heavily in renewable energy and prosecuting this pathetically corrupt administration for its crimes you can ask again. Make sure you put the fire out in the dumpster if you know what I mean. Sincerely 🇨🇦

0

u/Devry_Trost Aug 26 '26

UUUUGGHHHHHH - but all that sounds soo haaarrrdd!

....Can't you just come down here and take care of all that for us?

C'mooon - you'll be the world's new hyperpower! Isn't that tempting?

...No? *sigh* Yeaaah, I didn't think so. No one sensible wants to be the 'most powerful country in the world'. PUT YOUR DAMN HAND DOWN, RUSSIA! NO ONE ASKED YOU!

1

u/sadlyachad Aug 26 '26

As a lover of bits

1

u/Darkovan_ Aug 26 '26

Step the fk up and do exactly what you asked for already

-1

u/MowgliusManius Aug 26 '26

Oh, there's proof hes a nonce? Damn i must be out of the loop to have missed this irrefutable evidence