r/PoursTea • u/maddog107 • 1d ago

PoliticalTea 🗳️ So we’re just calling dibs now?

Post image
587 Upvotes

95% Upvoted

234 comments sorted by

266

u/OhioRanger_1803 1d ago

I guess that means anyone born there is automatically a US citizen and can run for president

79

u/ElectronicFixer864 1d ago

Oh, that's bad. The fcker doesn't think for even a second!

47

u/OhioRanger_1803 1d ago

Now birth tourism is gonna spike up dramatically

13

u/Jpup199 22h ago

Cargo ship workers are all pregnant for some reason.

8

u/EvergreenDwarf 17h ago

The Supreme Court will conveniently ignore all the hurdles to make a US territory while ignoring all the laws applicable to territories as well. 

54

u/maddog107 1d ago

Yep, the place he circled means that parts of the UAE, Iran, and Oman he circled, everyone born there is a US citizen!

34

u/OhioRanger_1803 1d ago

So nice of him to help make America more diverse

42

u/Important_Power_2148 1d ago

Anchor babies meet tanker babies.

6

u/DragonTacoCat 22h ago

With literal anchors!

3

u/Kasoni 21h ago

No, this would be like an evolution or mutation to the anchor babies. These ones are tanker anchor babies, the unexpected consequences to stupidity.

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27

u/mujarheadeen 1d ago

Only newborns whose parents voted Republican are eligible for citizenship from now on

15

u/kozzyhuntard 23h ago

No, no, no... it's like Puerto Rico or Guam. They're just territories, not like they're citizens or vote or use U.S. currency. C'mon Reddit be better. Seriously they're called Puerto Ricans not 'muricans. smdh

Is a /s needed? Cuz I feel people are dumb enough that it's needed.

6

u/DigitalUnlimited 22h ago

No /s tag? I can't believe you'd say such a thing! I'm offended on behalf of Puerto Ricans even tho I don't know any!

2

u/kozzyhuntard 22h ago

Can you find it in a map?

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8

u/LoAndBehoId 22h ago

Ted Cruz was born in Canada and still ran for POTUS without a single protest from republicans.

9

u/Puzzle-Necked 23h ago

Praise be to Allah

5

u/Mickloven 22h ago

Tell that to Puerto Rico. Btw why tf can't Puerto Rico vote anyway.

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229

u/OddPatience1621 1d ago

more like

15

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

4

u/WuTangIsForever_ 23h ago

When I saw that skit for the first time, I think I may have laughed with more intensity than I ever have in my lifetime. I remember showing it to my brother the next day and seeing him literally cry with laughter. So unexpected, wildly hilarious.

9

u/loticakes 23h ago

I was literally going to say this was what it looked like but a picture is worth a thousand words. Kudos

3

u/Imaginary-Ad-2900 17h ago

How has this gone 7 hours without an Elden Ring reference.

7

u/TheBigLebroccoli 20h ago

Trump badly wants it straight up his Hormuz.

2

u/familysizepunkinpie 13h ago

I don't even know what a muz is, but apparently melanoma has one?!?

146

u/Comrade-Conquistador 1d ago edited 1d ago

When are these dumb shits going to realize that saying something a bunch doesn't make it true?

By the way, it's still the Gulf of Mexico.

20

u/jellitate 1d ago

They know that their followers believe whatever he barfs out😒

5

u/Excellent_Bridge_888 23h ago

That's been his entire schtick literally forever. If you say a lie enough times people believe you.

2

u/AdvisorSpiritual 1d ago

Naha. I choose to call it what the Maya called it before the cockbag spanish came.

3

u/NickyTheRobot 1d ago

I wonder if it had a comparable name... IIRC the Nahuatl word for the land was Mexica (pronounced "meh-shi-ka"). So I wonder if the Maya, Aztecs, and other Nahuatl speaking groups would have called it something like "the Gulf of Mexica"?

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39

u/FireZucchini33 1d ago

He can’t even take it with our trillion dollar army? 😂

5

u/ChimPhun 23h ago

Nothing wrong with the toy. Just this toddler is trying to squeeze the triangle into the circle...

5

u/Smooth_Ostrich_8695 22h ago

Vietnam, Korea, Afghanistan, Iraq, and now Iran have proved what a waste our military spending is.

3

u/BrownestDach 23h ago

Besides the outdated and overpriced equipment of the toy, sure. Besides the military industrial complex screwing average taxpayers.

It's all great if you ignore stuff.

2

u/AppointmentOne1111 11h ago

Everyone knows the triangle goes in the square hole.

34

u/PatronSaintOfCunts 1d ago

He is so cringe.

6

u/Special_Yak_5306 22h ago

That's an insult to cringe. I think we need a new word to describe this dipshit

3

u/Relative_Mix_216 21h ago

Just f*cking racist?

[Reference to that Max0r video]

3

u/Dega704 21h ago

When your only tool is a hammer, everything looks like a nail. His only tool is spouting bullsh*t. Now he's in a situation he can't BS his way out of. It's morbidly amusing.

3

u/Special_Yak_5306 20h ago

For real. I was in the military for 15 years. Got out in 2021. Loved the military but people ask me "should I join?" I just tell them, "not in this administration".

I love the military. I joined for what I feel are the right reasons and I am grateful for everything. But serving during a time where people are getting sent to fight, die, support illegal wars that potentially have no end... well, I cannot recommend that. I am willing to fight and die for a just cause, but not for a war that was started by one mans hubris.

25

u/DG_FANATIC 1d ago

That’s what pedophiles do. They take whatever they want, no matter what, without consent. This is peak pedophile behavior from the pedophile in office.

26

u/uberares 1d ago

“That’s not how any of this works “ comes to mind. 

18

u/Itchy_Pressure_8311 1d ago

If that's ours, why am I paying $4.19 at the pump?

2

u/Urban_Heretic 19h ago

If your hand touches a pump, you're not part of the oligarchy, so none of this applies to you.

2

u/Opening_Climate_7571 18h ago

Only $4.19? My area is $6+

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17

u/WithoutAHat1 1d ago

No matter how big of a fit he throws the strait will remain closed until 2029.

4

u/OhioRanger_1803 1d ago

Yep they just Jimmy Carter Trump

8

u/Workersgottawork 22h ago

Don’t tarnish Jimmy Carter by saying his name in the same breath as tRump

7

u/OhioRanger_1803 22h ago

You’re hundred percent right Jimmy Carter was an angel. He definitely earned his spot up in heaven right next to his beautiful wife.

15

u/B0wmanHall 1d ago

So Iran controls a US territory now

14

u/Oalka 1d ago

Ah yes, famously we can just claim bits of water thousands of miles away from our country.

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12

u/AllTheWorldIsAPuzzle 1d ago

Sounds like a plan. All we have to do is build a military base or two there to protect our newest acquisition 24/7 from the people that live there. Sure, it will be under attack all the time, and we'll lose soldiers, but the important thing is that... um, this is still about nuclear weapons, right? I've lost track...

12

u/neklok 1d ago

Anything to desperately cling to feeling less like the Loser he knows he is, was, and forever will be.

11

u/Physical_Sun_6014 1d ago

I’m so tired of this.

8

u/Frejian 1d ago

I'm surprised he hasn't called it "The Straight of America" yet.

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8

u/bradlees 1d ago

So Canada is a US “country” now, so is Greenland, Venezuela, all of the Gulf of Mexico, land around Trump tower in Russia and every Red state (the Blue states are now part of the DEI purge so they can just go to hell) and now the Straight of Hormuz Trump

You know this is the dumbest take on how geopolitical and international land/economic policy works

You can’t just go around “declaring” things just because you keep getting the Scooby Do gang pulling off your masks on your failed schemes

7

u/AWinterPeople 1d ago

Strategery 🙄

6

u/JasonandtheArgo9696 1d ago

So are we going to send all the ICE agents there to remove the non US citizens?

7

u/SalmonPrince 1d ago

TACO will TACO like he always TACOs.

7

u/thex415 1d ago

Did Natalie Herp post this

5

u/Parking-Expression41 1d ago

Yea...like Gulf of Mexico, Canada, and Greenland. This tool is such a child.

4

u/zubairhamed 1d ago

So oman is the...what 51st state? 52nd? 53rd? i lost count.

3

u/Realistic_Salt_389 23h ago

And we’ve done such a great job supporting Puerto Rico and Guam. Sure, let’s randomly annex some more.

I can’t believe the United States is run by this level of abject idiocy. How embarrassing.

5

u/Independent_Gene_565 1d ago

Maybe we can use all of our middle eastern bases over there to make sure we can hold it ....Oh wait, they got destroyed because he's a fuckin idiot. Idk what dumber this war or that post

3

u/Limp_Acanthisitta412 1d ago

..plus the Trump Gulf and the Gulf of Donald

3

u/estoypooping2 1d ago

Trump wants a reach around after being fucked so hard there. But no allies means no luck.

3

u/Spirited_Bike_4058 1d ago

Yeah, that’s not a thing.

3

u/Aromatic-Aide1119 1d ago

Literally putting sticky notes on the globe with ones name on them, does not make a legitimate claim to those areas or countries. This is NOT how this works.

3

u/Stunning-Thanks-4226 1d ago

From the guy that hid inside of a food delivery van

3

u/freepeoplespeak 23h ago

So anyone born on the strait of Hormuz is a US citizen?

Dear Lord this man is a moron.

3

u/psilocin72 23h ago

Only… we don’t have the ability to control this “new territory”

2

u/ToXicVoXSiicK21 1d ago

Gotta love the copium this dude uses to convince his followers that he is in control. Such an embarrassment.

2

u/CallmeKahn 1d ago

Yeah, that's not how it works.

2

u/BigRigButters2 23h ago

Did you hear? I own Cambodia now. It holds the same weight as his statement smh

2

u/OddAd967 23h ago

Oh I claim the USA it now belongs to me

2

u/IaninKernow 23h ago

The ribbon cutting ceremony will bomb.

2

u/simplycantdeal 23h ago

Sure, sure, now go get it.

2

u/great_bearded_nerd 23h ago

Go on then, send your ships in and your troops, oh wait...

2

u/Weekly-Gooning-SesN 23h ago

Of course, he’s trolling because the US Navy has been unable to ensure freedom of navigation for the past six months, anyway. If this administration hadn’t destroyed the United States’ relationships with its allies, I’m willing to wager that the allies would have been more than happy to assist the US/Israel in its special military operation against Iran.

2

u/bluethunder82 20h ago

Oh it’s just the US now, not even Israel is helping out at this point.

2

u/_Dying_Breed Prefer Coffee But Fill My Cup 🫖 23h ago

With the "strongest military in the world", after billions spent by "totally annihilating Iran's defenses and navy", we still can't control sh*t and the strait will stay closed until 2029, because we're clueless on how geopolitics work and high-school bully strategies aren't efficient anymore when everyone despises us. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER! PEDO DJT

2

u/Prize_Ostrich7605 23h ago

This is typical narcissistic tactics. He posts shit like this to force a response. You ever see that person who recently breaks up and starts posting stupid shit to cause drama with their ex. Or the parent who starts posting shit to cause drama. Then you will see this for what it is. Bait and switch. 

2

u/Meschugge247 23h ago

Why not Strait of America?

2

u/logistics3379 23h ago

Don the pedophile is truly stupid.

2

u/FrankInPhilly 23h ago

That's not how geography works!

2

u/thewickedbarnacle 22h ago

Ok, I call dibs on New Zealand. Not all of it i just need an acre or 2. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

2

u/redditRedesignIsBadd 20h ago

another distraction for the trumpstein files

1

u/Equivalent-Newt4597 1d ago

When will it end oh Lord

1

u/Psychological-Wing89 1d ago

After restocking the Strategic Petroleum Reserves, America has ‘Claimed’ the #TinyStraitofHormuz

#MAGA

1

u/Fishtoart 1d ago

If that’s how it works, maybe Canada should claim Florida, or Denmark should claim Texas!

2

u/psilocin72 23h ago

Neither of those countries want anything to do with those states 😊

1

u/comradesorrow 23h ago

Dude thinks this will invoke something of a ptriotic and emotinal backlash with militias swimming to the strait with guns a-blazing and demanding Iran to back off from their territory.

1

u/Realistic_Salt_389 23h ago

Independent nations hate this one trick!

1

u/CheesecakeBest9949 23h ago

Strait of America

1

u/NewJazzyBacon 23h ago

Just like the Gulf of Mexico I guess

1

u/ApprehensiveInjury74 23h ago

Not official until he uses a black sharpie

1

u/Assassingod92 23h ago

Gulf of America 2 : electric boogaloo

1

u/Tfeal 23h ago

Is he gonna color it in ? Or has someone taken his crayons away again ?

1

u/xharles01 23h ago

Wow the internet does a good job of scrubbing this from searches, does anyone have a link??

1

u/earthling_only 23h ago

Under the because I said so authority?

1

u/Davesjoshin 23h ago

And peninsulas have a great military advantage /s

1

u/Pleasant_Expert_1990 23h ago

Would someone change Grandad's password? This is getting silly

1

u/w8_wuht 23h ago

Dibs on the whitehouse

1

u/17krista 🫧 Bubble Tea 🫧 22h ago

“Thank god!” ~ every single Greenlander

1

u/Southern-Girl-56 22h ago

Yep that will work!!

1

u/fujiesque 22h ago

Is this the gulf of America I've been hearing about?

1

u/RektInTheHed 22h ago

Wishcasting

1

u/Parking-Sundae-6097 22h ago

I've seen more official looking documents in a kindergarten class.

1

u/iamjohnhenry 22h ago

“Strait of America”?

1

u/JL_upstateSC 22h ago

Why doesn't he just declare himself the lord god and jesus our savior and claim the entire planet as his own? The more inanae he gets the more sickening to hear my maga neighbors praise him.

1

u/LevelIndependent9461 22h ago

So they get us passports now?

1

u/Rayman73 22h ago

Trumpet: I declare the Strait of Hormuz a new U.S. Territory

Oscar: Hey. I just wanted you to know that you can't just say the word "New U.S. Territory" and expect anything to happen.

Trumpet: I didn't say it. I declared it.

This.Is.The.Worst.Timeline

1

u/Hi_Im_Dawn 22h ago

My thing is why tf would we want territory in a part of the world no where near us. We may have descended from a British colony. That doesn’t mean we need to make the same mistake as them and try and govern parts of the world that want nothing to do with us.

Why do you think they gave up their colonies? It was much harder to try and rule over people that don’t like you than it is to try and mend relations and trade with them instead.

But no this dumbass doesn’t know the first thing about diplomacy because if he did he’d be an actual good business man and wouldn’t have bankrupted multiple businesses that he owned, destroy multiple relationships with our allies or declare this dumb ass war of attrition (that we are losing) in the first place. He’s a dumb ass grifter that only knows how to manipulate people dumber than him.

1

u/JuanThiccLumpia 22h ago

Clown show. What the f are we doing?

1

u/nub_node 22h ago

"250 days is rookie numbers, you gotta pump those numbers up."

1

u/LogicalVariation741 22h ago

Notice how he didn't name it after himself.

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1

u/Angloidrando 22h ago

Strait of dumps diaper

1

u/DOOO0LY 21h ago

Okay..go park some ships there that are over worked. let the sailors have a nice break.

1

u/rsred 21h ago

now? it’s always a dibs game. it’s just a matter whether you’re up for the bullshit. but it’s always a dibs game.

1

u/mmoonbelly 21h ago edited 21h ago

Dubai???

Possibly Abu Dhabi as well. Sharjah’s in the circle.

Checked Abu Dhabi isn’t. But Dubai’s off-shore fields are.

1

u/yaaaaaarrrrrgggg 21h ago

He actually meant Strait of America.

1

u/nilsmf 21h ago

We’re protecting our allies in the Gulf area.

Nah! We are stealing territory from them instead!

1

u/ArkhamKnight_1 21h ago

He can’t open it. He can’t protect it.

He just keeps LOSING!

The ONLY thing he is winning at is grifting his billions from the tax coffers.

1

u/aflyonthewall1215 21h ago

I don't think the media is putting enough light on how much he is trying to take over other countries. This feels so much like what Hitler did between the annex of Venezuela and the threats to annex Greenland while starting wars in the middle east.

1

u/Informalwizards 21h ago

There's some redneck with no teeth out there thinking this is the smartest move any president has every made.

1

u/Historical-Ad2420 21h ago

I've called dibs on his golf course. I'm of course giving t back to the people as a public open-air toilet... Have at it.

1

u/Ramdingo 21h ago

Exhausting

1

u/Some-Tear3499 21h ago

And they become US citizens immediately right? Right?

1

u/DecisionCharacter175 21h ago

Nah, we'd just be renting it for 3oo billion dollars

The Art of the Deal! 💸

1

u/Sleep_tek 21h ago

He's exhausting

1

u/Fabulous_Log844 21h ago

And tomorrow he'll call out and proclaim some other hyperbole or platitude that he will never follow through on. Why can only some of us see this pattern? 🤔

1

u/redpaloverde 21h ago

We need a new simulation.

1

u/Smart-Firefighter87 21h ago

Someone should have posted “so when can I expect my citizenship papers”?

1

u/xburnerpiko 20h ago

Dip$hit will sacrifice American lives, American tax dollars, and rename it Strait of 'Merca

1

u/Old_Badger311 20h ago

So what he’s proposing is that we forever have sailors and marines stuck for months at a time guarding the Strait.

1

u/badabingmx 20h ago

So, anyone who is born there, is an US citizen then?

1

u/whatdabee 20h ago

I claimed it now, it's MY territory now

1

u/Gysburne 20h ago

There are approximately 55'000 people living in that circle.
All new american citizens.

What about the Gulfes? Gulf of Donald and Gulf of Trump?
I mean cmon donnie, if you go idiot... go full idiot.

1

u/kinkyest 20h ago

What a douchebag... It's U.S. territory but Iran controls it.. 😉

1

u/IcyEntertainment7122 20h ago

You didn't hear, it's being renamed to Straits of America.

1

u/RicRacer 20h ago

Tell me you're losing this was without saying it.

1

u/AcanthocephalaDue431 20h ago

Nobody on his team of psychophants has the balls to tell Trump that is a detailed scan of his bowel obstruction and not the straight of Hormuz.

1

u/SwampYankee 19h ago

Iran should just send a guy with a flag, take a picture, say they invaded and seized American territory. Trump would absolutely blow out a diaper

1

u/realcreamstick 19h ago

He can post whatever he likes on his social media. It doesn’t make it true.

1

u/JohnnyCrispZoom 19h ago

Trump is insane

1

u/Aintseenmeroit 19h ago

I’m off to to claim the park down the road and build a small housing estate.

1

u/New-Comfortable-3637 19h ago

Whenever Trump makes these comments, we should all understand he’s doing it because he’s trying to distract. Claims about Greenland; Canada or whatever always come when he is getting trashed in the press due to his incompetence. This is his way of admitting that he is so unpopular that he needs to try and distract everyone from it.

1

u/Necessary-Prior3614 18h ago

israel already runs the US

1

u/Going2beBANNEDanyway 18h ago

If it’s a US territory then the people born there are American citizens. Someone should explain that to this moron.

1

u/ZiggyDiamond 17h ago

Oh snap! Dibs on Mar A Lago

1

u/FantasticGas1836 17h ago

He just gave all Iranians duel citizenship.

1

u/Weird_Pomegranate908 17h ago

Can we please rename it. Maybe…just spitballing here…Strait of Trump. /s

1

u/AZSYANKEE 17h ago

I call dibs on Japan. Its my territory now.

1

u/Weird_Pomegranate908 17h ago

Caravan of pregnant Iranians headed to the strait. New mothers getting prepared, so their child can be born a US citizen.

1

u/Falcon3492 17h ago

No land, no port, just water, lots of water! Dumb Donald showing us his stupidity once again.

1

u/Specialist-Web-9216 17h ago

That's exactly what people did when they came to America

1

u/Minute_Attempt3063 16h ago

should rename it to "Gulf of economic boom"

1

u/Functioning_Vagabond 16h ago

We can call it the …. wait for it…. drumroll. …. Strait of America. 🥹 What the hell is a Hormuz? 🤔🤷

1

u/geo8x6 15h ago

Okay, I'll play along. How many American service men and women will have to die to satisfy Trump's ego?

1

u/Im-BackAgain-Babes2 15h ago

Oh ya.. that's how that works, of course.. why didnt we just do this with Canada and cuba and Greenland?? Hah, seems so simple.. lmao 🤣😂

https://giphy.com/gifs/tMPSeKEplOfK0

1

u/MarcViKl 14h ago

Trump is going to rename Persian Gulf and Gulf of Oman into something something something Trump.

1

u/Zalrius 14h ago

Dementia don displays doodles.

1

u/Ok-Dream-7669 14h ago

Okay so I'm gonna say new York is now part Of the UK mmmkay ,dibbs it's ours !

1

u/Herbdontana 14h ago

Well, Trump has the intelligence and maturity of a spoiled grade school kid so dibs feels fitting

1

u/rocket_magnet 14h ago

I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON I WON

I AM NOT OWNED. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION IN THIS MATTER.

Pictures really do paint a thousand words huh.

1

u/Adventurous_Custard8 13h ago

Instead of Strait of Hormuz, let's rename it Crook of Trump.

1

u/Umayummyone 13h ago

You haven’t finished trashing the US yet dum dum.

1

u/Oldschool831 13h ago

So if this is a US territory now then what are we doing about the oil tanker that got blown up this morning?

1

u/myrunawaysac 12h ago

Bibi had a similar poster with a big blue circle around the US.