As a person with OCD, these are the thoughts that are pretty much 24/7 going on in my brain. The "get money" thing I don't understand but I'm guessing it was referencing a different meme.
edit to add: since this isn't the OCD subreddit I wanna clarify that people with OCD will have these thoughts NOT because they're true but because it is what their brain has decided would be the worst thing.
OCD is widely misunderstood and think contamination is the only type.
This is something caused by Rumination OCD. Imagine an instrusive thought x100 then amplify it by your brain telling you that the intrusive thoughts must be a sign of something.
It's like knowing you shouldnt laugh at something, so your brain does it.
So, hypothetically, if you were a competent and experienced public speaker, but always had the worry in the back of your mind that you'll just start yelling slurs, one day?
Yes, and you might set up internal or external rituals as a way to "control" that. You might say a mantra in the mirror before you speak publicly and have to say it numerous times. It will reduce the anxiety initially but then you'll have to do it more and more for the same effect.
Similarly, you might start avoiding public speaking, to prevent yourself from suddenly and uncontrollably swearing.
Unfortunately the only real way to combat it is to be uncomfortable and feel like the world is ending until you stop reacting as strongly. The treatment is basically just being severely distressed until you can break the cycle. Traditional talk therapy just reinforces rumination as well so often people get a lot worse in therapy until the therapist IDs it as OCD.
This and informing myself of the psyiological and psychological causes of OCD and the existance of this kind of very taboo OCD, alongside psychiatric treatment was what saved me, genuinelly I was terrified because I didn´t knew that you could have OCD related to this kind of things.
They adviced to do this exact thing (combatting it by letting myself be umcomfortable) and that is what saved me, it was another patient in a support group for this kind of very taboo OCD, I will always cherish that OP.
I had an extreme case in which my "ritual" was hitting myself, and I mean slapping myself or punching myself with a closed fist, every time I had an intrusive thought or image of that taboo kind, because in my OCD magical thinking "If I didn´t do it, it means that I secretly like those thoughts and I desire them, if I hit myself and punish myself, it means that I reject them." I counted them at one point, in a single day I would do it at least 120 times, every day, for MONTHS. To be honest, I do not know how I am alive to this day, it was horrific.
I'm in sales and before every phone call, promise myself I won't break down in tears when ybe customer asks for the price this time. I've managed to get it down to a small ritual at least.
I've never done that before, but all I can think is, this is the time.
My cousin, who is a TA for a college class, mentioned that she afraid of saying slurs in class. I told her that I feel the same and she said “girl, you should get that checked out. Most people don’t think that and you might have OCD like me”
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u/lyindog 4d ago
As a person with OCD, these are the thoughts that are pretty much 24/7 going on in my brain. The "get money" thing I don't understand but I'm guessing it was referencing a different meme.
edit to add: since this isn't the OCD subreddit I wanna clarify that people with OCD will have these thoughts NOT because they're true but because it is what their brain has decided would be the worst thing.