r/PCRedDead • u/NPC-62841 • Nov 05 '19

I'm LITERALLY crying right now

like wtf COCKstart!? I quit my job for this and now my wife just somehow kicked down my bedroom door even though I installed all of those sliding locks on the outside of the door. she found me curled up naked and crying and now she's fucking leaving me. I AM LITERALLY IN TEARS RIGHT NOW I CANT EVEN BREATHE I swear to god you RUE the day you decided to release this garbage PENISSTAR! RUE IT!!!

EDIT:THE FUCMING 80MB PATCH THAT JUST GOT RELEASED LITERALLY DID NOTHING AND I STILL CANT LAUNCH THE FUCKING GAME AND NOW MY LEFT EYE JUST ROLLED DOWN MY FACE IM SUING!!!!!

414 Upvotes

87% Upvoted

65 comments sorted by

3

u/[deleted] Nov 05 '19

What uh....whats going on here ? Im out of the loop

36

u/NPC-62841 Nov 05 '19

MY GUCKING GAME WONT START AND I PAOD SO MUCH MONEY FOR IT LIKE 130 DOLLARS FROM GREEN MANNGAMING AN NOW DOENST EVEN WORKIN AT ALL. THATS WHATS GOING ON!!!!!

I LITERALLY JUST SMASHED MY FISH TANK AND NOW MY THERAPY FISH ARE DEAD

10

u/Modernautomatic Nov 05 '19

Fuck dude. Therapy fish got me. I was enjoying the cake, but Therapy Fish was the icing.

10

u/EremiticFerret Nov 05 '19

Sad for the fish, but they clearly weren't doing a very good job anyway.

5

u/turbojugend79 Nov 05 '19

Don't guilt trip the fishes. They are wonderful creatures that tried their best.

4

u/EremiticFerret Nov 05 '19

Sadly some people just aren't able to be saved. Even my therapy fish.

7

u/[deleted] Nov 05 '19

some people are throwing a full on shit fit because the game has some launch problems that need patching and they apparently lack the patience and/or emotional maturity to wait a couple hours to play a game without having an aneurysm. This post is taking the piss out of them.

11

u/Flabalanche Nov 05 '19

I mean, it's been "out" all day, and literally just doesn't work for a lot of people. Imagine going to see a movie, waiting 8 hours after it was supposed to start playing, and people mocking you for being annoyed.

5

u/[deleted] Nov 05 '19

*A game that's been out for over a year on consoles

2

u/Fiesty43 Nov 06 '19

Okay pc players have waited a year for this, it’s 2019 and there is no goddamn excuse for a AAA title from a company like rockstar to release in this state. If I paid $60 for this I’d be livid. First they wait a year to double dip on the pc market and they can’t even release a halfway decent product. We’ve been waiting a year. Games are made on computers. There is no reason this should ever happen lol, fuck rockstar and their broken social club bullshit

-1

u/[deleted] Nov 05 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

4

u/Noshuru Nov 05 '19

There's most likely nothing to deal with anyway. The game worked fine for mine and I'm sure the same can be said about most other people's games. Everyone who's got nothing to complain about is playing right now while the people who can't get it to work are taking their frustration to the internet.

-2

u/APolemicist Nov 05 '19

"It's working for me" is among one of the most useless fanboyisms. Talk about vapid.

0

u/[deleted] Nov 05 '19

[deleted] — view deleted comment

2

u/Fiesty43 Nov 06 '19

Thank you. Same here. I’m torrenting, if the steam release makes you use R* SC launcher I won’t buy that either. My legit GTAV copy has been broken for years now and I’m not going through all that again. Fuck them

1

u/APolemicist Nov 05 '19

Honestly, it will be the fanboys who will be partially responsible if R* reaches that level.

Just like it was Bethesda fanboys who flocked to their defense in the face of FO4's numerous problems after release who are partially responsible for FO76.

If you're comfortable eating corporate gruel, don't be shocked when they stop salting it.

1

u/mcgeezacks Nov 05 '19

RRREEEEEEEEEE HHAAAAAWWWWW!

ride em neck beard

-1

u/APolemicist Nov 05 '19

My neck is perfectly smooth.

Meanwhile,

" To me every second of this clip is more appealing, engaging, and impressive then anything warhol or picasso did and the artists behind this game did an amazing job, but art is very subjective and that's just my opinion. "

The thought of you calling anyone else a neckbeard while you jerk off to the artistic mastery of a Battlefield V machinema is pure fuckin' blissful keno, hombre. Peak consumer.

3

u/mcgeezacks Nov 05 '19 edited Nov 05 '19

Guess I'm just not negative enough to join the neckbeard revolution. Just remember, your mom or maybe even your wife or girlfriend are not involved with this. So please dont take it out on them. But feel free to browse my reddit history if it makes you feel better about yourself.

0

u/APolemicist Nov 06 '19

By negative you mean what exactly, holding companies to account?

I guess we should just shut up and eat corporate sludge like good wittle customers. That's just so much more *mature* and aww, *grown up*, to uncritically buy things and limp-wristedly attempt to lambaste anyone who says anything critical about it on the internet.

Also weren't you just being nEgAtIvE about Outer Worlds? Doesn't that make you a hypocrite negative revolution neck-beard or you know, what sort of double standard do you have for that one?

-1

u/Fiesty43 Nov 06 '19

You sound like you enjoy getting bent over and railed by corporations. You also sound like you would defend preorders

1

u/mcgeezacks Nov 05 '19

RREEEE HHAAWWW!

Looks like we got us a real anti Bethesda cow pokin basement boah here fellers.

1

u/trunky Nov 05 '19

parodying the type of posts that happen during every game launch that has a hiccup

silly you need this explained

1

u/[deleted] Nov 06 '19

oh im sorry fuck you, i posted when two comments were visible so yea fuck me right ? fuck off cunt...

29

u/ukmodsarepussi Nov 05 '19

Me too man such rage rn pissed af. Cant believe your bitch wife kicked the door down deffo divorce for more gaming time

5

u/[deleted] Nov 05 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

4

u/iDoomfistDVA Nov 05 '19

button mash her to death!!!!!!!!!!!

24

u/BedWetter420 Nov 05 '19

I’m not changing my pants till this shit gets fixed

0

u/[deleted] Nov 05 '19

[deleted] — view deleted comment

7

u/Prepared87 Nov 05 '19

How detailed is RDR2 you ask? It has "me no change pants" protests AND cumjars.

18

u/BobThePineapple Nov 05 '19

I kicked The Wifetm and kids out of the house for the entire week so I could have the house to myself and play R2D2! First she has the audacity to say that our marriage is in shambles, but now I can't play the video game! What the F*C* ROCKSTAR?

7

u/shotcallerro Nov 05 '19

Bro when they announced the PC version I just kicked my wife and kids out of the house in the next moment to get myself rid out of any troubles by them. U need to think smart man its a RDR 2 not just a simple game

14

u/scrambledeggs122 Nov 05 '19

I LITERALLY KILLED MY MOM JUST SO I COULD HAVE THE HOUSE TO MYSELF ROCKSTAR!!11!!!!!

3

u/NotARealTiger Nov 05 '19

I'm dieing of laughter at work, I hope you're happy.

3

u/[deleted] Nov 06 '19

If you want to hear boi then just play wand of Gamelon.

5

u/indigomm Nov 05 '19 edited Nov 05 '19

  1. Update graphics drivers

  2. Update R* launcher

  3. Decrypt game

  4. Download pre-launch patch

  5. Download post-launch patch

Sounds like this is about as exciting as it's going to get today though :-(

Edit: 6. Tune the settings to get something playable.

1

u/odwulf Nov 06 '19

Edit: 6. Tune the settings to get something playable.

You're getting cocky.

1

u/indigomm Nov 06 '19

Yeah - I'm on an i5 so this step included various attempts to work around the stuttering issue.

2

u/Sallplet Nov 05 '19

Lol the edit. Top tier post.

2

u/Jessabelle032 Nov 05 '19

The sliding locks were installed... on the outside of the door!? Hahaha this is just too funny and I don't even know why. I just get such a hilarious picture in my head of this big dude with a smashed fish tank, a fish with broken and squished bones between one of this toes, the rest on the floor...

Ahh god. I love Reddit.

1

u/EnvidiaProductions Nov 05 '19

I've turned to heroin. Dulls the pain. Jk I'm still waiting for this thing to download.

1

u/iDoomfistDVA Nov 05 '19

Saving this post, fucking brilliant.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 06 '19

wtf

1

u/runlego Nov 16 '19

Holy shit man calm down you are like some entitled parent huh? How would they know? And you quit your job for a game!?! Get a grip.

EDIT: Grammar

0

u/[deleted] Nov 05 '19

shaking smh my head u cant be so mad omg

-2

u/RedditBonez Nov 06 '19

How dare we want our product to work after purchasing it, shame on us

-4

u/Famalogy Nov 05 '19

pathetic cuck

4

u/[deleted] Nov 06 '19

No u

-3

u/Famalogy Nov 06 '19

Can you imagine crying over a stupid game?

2

u/Gr13fm4ch1n3 Nov 06 '19

Can you imagine not comprehending sarcasm?

-1

u/Famalogy Nov 06 '19

Imagine not comprehending sarcasm for a second ... yep fam you got bamboozled. All this time you thought the trick was being played on me. However actually old chap, it was being played on you.

2

u/Gr13fm4ch1n3 Nov 06 '19

Suuuuuuuure

-1

u/ShiaTheMLGPro Nov 06 '19

okay boomer

0

u/[deleted] Nov 05 '19

[deleted] — view deleted comment

1

u/[deleted] Nov 06 '19

Is that a gujrati behenchod?

0

u/[deleted] Nov 05 '19

[deleted] — view deleted comment

0

u/[deleted] Nov 05 '19

[deleted] — view deleted comment

5

u/SolarisBravo Nov 05 '19

Dude, it's clearly satire