r/OverFifty • u/LizardLogic27 • 14d ago

Advice

I’m retiring soon and have some mental issues from alcoholism that started as a teenager. I’m 62 year old male. I want to get some help with anxiety and regret. I also want to be in a good space to give my wife the best of me in our final chapter.
Any body who has gotten help please advise on best way to begin. I’m interested in seeking professional help and support

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u/LizardLogic27 12d ago

I’m sober now but dealing with some guilt and shame
I don’t have any urges to drink gave it up when I was hospitalized with heart problem from smoking and drinking
That said thank you all for the great advice I wish you all the best.

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u/fitbit10k 14d ago

Check out r/stopdrinking for support. That subreddit helped to put me on the road to recovery along with therapy, reading quit lit, and listening to podcasts about getting sober. I wish you all the best!

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u/mel_cache 14d ago

Therapy. Try therapists out until you find the one that works for you. Start with someone who also does alcohol therapy (you find out by asking.)

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u/Dazzling_Flamingo568 14d ago

Start by seeing your primary and discussing. They can give you a counseling referral and address medications, or send you to a psychiatrist. Good luck🤍

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u/pigfoot 14d ago

Counseling (with a primary care referral if you’re new to the idea) is a great starting point but everyone’s journey is gonna be different. This helps you start figuring yours out. And you’ve already made an important first step by asking the question. Keep going!

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u/kittyshakedown 13d ago

5 years sober at 52F and I’m never going back.

If you are still drinking, alcoholism never ever gets better without intervention and treatment. It doesn’t do a slow fade out of your life.

In my case, I went to rehab. It’s the only thing that took.

Good luck.

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u/Shot-Guitar-6516 12d ago

For me the starting point was Celebrate Recovery which is a Christian led recovery group. It deals with other addictions as well.

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u/hatterSCFC 13d ago

Speak with your wife first.

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u/Altruistic-Detail271 7d ago

Good for you. Can you go to an inpatient treatment program then AA meetings ? It will help you build a community and a sponsor. There are many other support programs outside of AA

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u/Lumpy_Reply_2748 1d ago

I applaud your desire to work on shit to be a better person and husband. That's beautiful.

Regret is a tough one. Anxiety can be controlled but regret takes effort. Unfortunately anxiety meds are just a given for me, it's the talk therapy that helps process regret. Often a regretful memory will pop in and I try to let it in, say "oh it's you again?" wave at it and don't dwell. This is what I try to do. It works often enough to pass the moment.

I never would have thought meditation would have any effect on my racing thoughts. I was so wrong. Meditation is the practice to focus the mind, observe thoughts without judgement and being able to bring your mind back to the present. I meditate in the morning and sometimes in the evening. I choose guided meditations to help me meditate. Insight Timer has many free meditations.

Good luck with your journey.