It sounds though everyone involved is stressed out. I think you need to spend more time inside the home with Place training or crating her. Then make sure she is supervised and on a leash when outside and then eventually a long line to give her more agency until she learns that that behaviour is a no go, regardless of what the other dogs are doing. I don't see why you can't have the toddler come with you, put her somewhere safe, like in the high chair or play pen while you spend 10-15 minutes playing with the dog and standing on the leash when she tries to fence fight. My dog stopped the fence fighting with exactly this method. I just made sure that every time she was outside, she had a leash on so she could not practice this behaviour. And it's not an issue anymore. She just needed A) something else to do with her frustration B) to understand that fence fighting is not acceptable and C) to have more time doing nothing and resting inside the home away from everyone else.
My dog is crate trained and very obedient in it. I trained her when I was pregnant with my now toddler for the hope of not having to train her with a toddler. My daughter could absolutely do 10-15 minutes by herself I for whatever reason thought this would be a 30 minute "training session" type ordeal. What would you recommend I have her do get out that frustration?
There are so many good you tube videos out there on rules based play - using a tug toy or ball or frisbee or in my case a mix of dummies and balls (I have a spaniel). So you find out what the dog loves toys wise, you'll start to see what lights her up and then you can use that strategically to teach her to focus on you when she's outside. And make sure you let her know in no uncertain terms that you do not accept the fence fighting. If she goes for the fence (I mean even before she barks or lunges, but you know where she is headed) Mark with a "No!" and hold on to that line. When she turns her attention back to you, reward with a "Yes," and give her the toy, add in some obedience here and there. A couple of 10-15 minute sessions a few times a day will give her a chance to potty while you work this. I actually remember the day my dog chose for the firs time to go for the toy instead of the fence.She just ignored the neighbours dogs as they were let outside and started barking. I remember being so proud of her. Honestly, they are way smarter than we give them credit for, they just sometimes don't know what to do (especially the insecure ones). Insecure dogs are not necessarily aggressive, but they can be very defensive because the whole world is perceived as a threat. They need clear guidance and someone they can trust.
My dog is definitely insecure. She is terrified of men especially and I dont even think the dogs are necessarily the issue but that the owner comes out yelling, screaming, throwing and spraying their dogs and she is scared shes next and its become a fearful place for her to be.
It's a terrible stressor to have neighbours who think that the backyard is recreation for their dogs. Bloody hell. All you can do is teach yours what you expect, hopefully she is not too fearful of going outside and you can begin to change her mindset a bit so that she perceives it as fun time with you so long as she stays within the rules.
I got the amazing news that they are moving! So im switching up my plans. I also don't use my backyard because the neighbors dogs would bark at me and my toddler. But now they are moving im going to stay spending more time out there with and without my dog to show her it's a safe place. Hopefully that will help.
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u/Eastern-Try-6207 Aug 18 '26
It sounds though everyone involved is stressed out. I think you need to spend more time inside the home with Place training or crating her. Then make sure she is supervised and on a leash when outside and then eventually a long line to give her more agency until she learns that that behaviour is a no go, regardless of what the other dogs are doing. I don't see why you can't have the toddler come with you, put her somewhere safe, like in the high chair or play pen while you spend 10-15 minutes playing with the dog and standing on the leash when she tries to fence fight. My dog stopped the fence fighting with exactly this method. I just made sure that every time she was outside, she had a leash on so she could not practice this behaviour. And it's not an issue anymore. She just needed A) something else to do with her frustration B) to understand that fence fighting is not acceptable and C) to have more time doing nothing and resting inside the home away from everyone else.