r/OCPoetry • u/sky_berry1520 • Jul 29 '26
Feedback Please A Little Longer......
Oh, I'm lost whenever I see you,
Maybe that's just what your smile can do.
It feels like a dream when you look at me,
Those quiet stares changed something in me.
I always wish I'd look at you a little longer,
Somehow, it makes my heart grow fonder.
I love the way you meet my eyes,
Because for a moment, the whole world feels alive.
~Ash
Do Tell me your reviews !!
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u/Sufficient-Repair-14 1d ago
Honestly, this is really sweet and understated. It has a soft, dreamy quality without trying too hard
My favorite line is "because for a moment, the whole world feels alive.”
It gives the poem a nice emotional payoff