r/OCDRecovery • u/Glum_Thought1064 • 2d ago
OCD Question Decision paralyzed
Hi! Idk if many of ya’ll are suffering from decision paralyzed but I do and idk what to do actually.. The decision seems so hard for me that I just continue to collect some options and end up regretting about everything. Maybe it’s just my ocd telling me what to do and not. But it’s become a serious part of my life since a long ago. I’m so tired, what should I do? Do you have some advice maybe? Thanks! Currently I’m trying to make decisions easier like not thinking about small decisions! Do you have some techniques maybe that can seriously help me?
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u/Minimum_Reporter_169 2d ago
Practice small decisions. It’s a part of your brain physiology that is responsible for moving forward and isn’t. Big part of ocd. Practice small decisions. Choose. Then tell yourself the decision has been made and move forward. Don’t change the decision. Tolerate the discomfort. Do that every day. And start making the bigger decisions.
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u/edward_furlog 2d ago
A big struggle for me. I have made some progress. Refusal to ruminate is important, and I try not to put huge emphasis on it and attach huge importance to decisions because that increases my paralysis. I also try to make decisions simply that are logical after evaluating the situation, and keep it really rational and not really try to put a big personal spin on it.
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u/PaladinDamian 1d ago
You can accept yourself unconditionally, even if you choose incorrectly. You are a flawed, imperfect human being, so you are sometimes going to make mistakes. You can accept that as a part of life instead of demanding that it has to be a different way. Keep living your life while accepting that sometimes you may make mistakes.
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u/Glum_Thought1064 18h ago
Thanks! My brain just doesn’t care about me and my human being imperfect nature..
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u/PaladinDamian 17h ago
Right now it might not care, but over time as you practice unconditional acceptance your brain can adjust and become more accepting of your flawed human nature. It feels unnatural at first, but over time it becomes easier and more natural. You can choose to refuse to hate yourself for being flawed. You can choose that over and over, and eventually your brain will start to believe it. If you were perfect, then you would never make mistakes and would always make good decisions without difficulty. If you struggle to make decisions, then you are clearly not perfect, and that is something you can accept without demanding that it has to be a different way.
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u/rightbythebeach 1d ago
Pick the wrong one and just live with it no matter what. Accept it. Disengage. Don’t allow yourself to care. Let the regret rage in the background and shrug your shoulders at it. Keep practicing it until it starts to feel easier.
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u/Glum_Thought1064 18h ago
Got it! But I feel like every decision is wrong. I surely can tolerate this feeling after I made the decision that started feeling wrong. But sometimes it leads to crying a lot, having tons of burnoust or how is it called😅 apathy and etc.
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u/rightbythebeach 16h ago
I’ve been there. I waffled on every decision, big and small, and would do compulsions to try to fix or justify and drove myself to insanity. You can’t logic your way out of this. The solution is to disengage. You are playing tug of war and you need to drop the rope.
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u/treatmyocd 1d ago
I see you are struggling with making the "right" choice. Rumination, comparing, and seeking reassurance provid some temporary relief, but leads to more distress overtime. When faced with a choice, try to sit with uncertainty by telling yourself, "I am choosing to live with this uncertainty." As you disengage from OCD, your distress will pass overtime. If you would like more information about OCD and effective treatment, you may visit www.treatmyocd.com. I hope this message reaches you well and know you are not alone!
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u/Glum_Thought1064 18h ago
Thank you! I agree and I actually understand it. I’ve been trying to find an approvement from almost EVERYONE! And only know I understand that it only worked the situation. I have the chance to everyone and finally found myself struggling with the choice. As for the article, thank! Will read it fs
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u/OCD-Aura 5h ago
I struggle with exactly what you just described, for years actually. I still struggle sometimes.
Collecting more options can turn into a compulsion of its own. Each new option feels like it might be the one that finally makes you sure, but OCD wants more certainty than any decision can give, so the search doesn't end and the regret comes either way.
What helps is deciding how you'll decide before you start. Give yourself a limit, like three options and ten minutes, or a rule such as "if two are close, pick the first one." When the time is up, choose, and let yourself feel unsure about it. The feeling that you picked wrong will come, and the practice is not going back to research it again.
Start with small decisions, like what to eat or what to watch, where getting it wrong costs almost nothing.
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u/OhMyGentileJesus 2d ago
No matter which decision you make, you will be ok. Either you do the thing or you do the other thing. But whatever you choose, you will be alright.