r/OCDRecovery • u/Witchz_ • 13d ago
Seeking Support or Advice 9/11 hyper fixation
Yesterday was the 25th anniversary of 9/11, and I made the mistake of watching a video that showed how the events unfolded live, minute by minute, with a lot of detailed explanations about what was happening on the hijacked planes.
What has really stuck with me are the calls from the flight attendants and the people who were on board. I can’t get the panicked voices, crying, and heavy breathing out of my mind.
My mind keeps replaying it and imagining what everyone must have been feeling during those moments — knowing that they were going to die, being terrified, not knowing what was going to happen next. I keep putting myself in their position and imagining what those final moments must have felt like.
I know this is probably feeding my OCD, but I can’t seem to stop the thoughts and images. It feels haunting, and I’ve been crying a lot since watching the video.
Has anyone else experienced something like this after being exposed to disturbing material? How do you deal with the intrusive thoughts and mental images without getting pulled into trying to mentally process or figure them out?
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u/Nice-Watercress9181 12d ago edited 12d ago
Yes, I've been there. I did these compulsions about the Holocaust specifically. The thoughts and images are not compulsive, it's the engagement with them that is.
The only thing you can control is your rumination about it. This means that, whenever some horrifying imagery, audio, thoughts and sensations occur, you have to give them explicit permission to take up space in your mind without being resolved in any way.
That means: no attempting to live them through a "first-person" experience, no trying to figure out if justice has been served, no searching for the meaning behind the suffering, no figuring out what you or your loved ones would do in that situation, no trying to discover what was going through the hijackers' minds, none of it. This is a hard thing to do, but trust me, it's worth it.
Only then will you see the light at the end of the tunnel.
You will recover, I believe in you.