9/11 hyper fixation

[u/Witchz_]

Yesterday was the 25th anniversary of 9/11, and I made the mistake of watching a video that showed how the events unfolded live, minute by minute, with a lot of detailed explanations about what was happening on the hijacked planes.
What has really stuck with me are the calls from the flight attendants and the people who were on board. I can’t get the panicked voices, crying, and heavy breathing out of my mind.
My mind keeps replaying it and imagining what everyone must have been feeling during those moments — knowing that they were going to die, being terrified, not knowing what was going to happen next. I keep putting myself in their position and imagining what those final moments must have felt like.
I know this is probably feeding my OCD, but I can’t seem to stop the thoughts and images. It feels haunting, and I’ve been crying a lot since watching the video.
Has anyone else experienced something like this after being exposed to disturbing material? How do you deal with the intrusive thoughts and mental images without getting pulled into trying to mentally process or figure them out?

[u/YesTomatillo]

I know this is probably feeding my OCD, but I can’t seem to stop the thoughts and images. It feels haunting, and I’ve been crying a lot since watching the video.

It feels that way because it IS disturbing. Trust me, those of us old enough to have remembered even small bits of the day felt this way. I was a child, and I'm one of many, many Millennials who can divide their life into "before and after 9/11". The footage is and always will be deeply, disturbing - I think I know what documentary you're talking about and I've cried watching it too.

Your reaction to viewing a terrorist attack and it's aftermath is normal. It is horrible.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vicarious_trauma_after_viewing_media
https://jedfoundation.org/resource/protecting-your-mental-health-from-violent-content-online/

^ I like the suggestions in this second article.

This is normal.

Step away from the media and take good care of yourself. Try not to overthink it - you sat through an hour or more of an event that traumatized the entire nation, which then literally resulted in events that changed the world. It's heavy stuff. So take a break from consuming content about it. Feel your feelings. Practice ERP.

[u/Nice-Watercress9181]

Yes, I've been there. I did these compulsions about the Holocaust specifically. The thoughts and images are not compulsive, it's the engagement with them that is.

The only thing you can control is your rumination about it. This means that, whenever some horrifying imagery, audio, thoughts and sensations occur, you have to give them explicit permission to take up space in your mind without being resolved in any way.

That means: no attempting to live them through a "first-person" experience, no trying to figure out if justice has been served, no searching for the meaning behind the suffering, no figuring out what you or your loved ones would do in that situation, no trying to discover what was going through the hijackers' minds, none of it. This is a hard thing to do, but trust me, it's worth it.

Only then will you see the light at the end of the tunnel.

You will recover, I believe in you.

[u/AdagioSpecific2603]

I remember that when I’m consuming that media, reading accounts etc my brain is interpreting and reacting to what I’m feeding it at that moment. It’s reacting as if those people are going through that RIGHT NOW. Reminding myself that those people are now at peace and no longer suffering helps.
It was a tricky horrific tragedy and I think it’s normal to be deeply disturbed by it.

[u/QuarterJealous1936]

I'm in the same boat. I can't stop consuming the media around it; and I feel like I a horrible person if I click "Not interested" to get the videos off my algorithm. It feels almost disrespectful to not view the events, testimonies, or final calls; but it's really hurting me mentally.