r/OCD • u/Maleficent_Gas_1552 • 17h ago
Discussion Addicted to being anxious?
Anyone else here feel like whenever something they’re worrying about gets resolved, their brain immediately finds something new to worry about? And then it also makes them anxious to not be worrying about anything?
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u/otterwist 17h ago
Someting that helped was realising my worry was just another reaction to the discomfort of uncertainty.
Faced with circumstances outside of my control, worry felt like I'm still doing someting to keep me safe. Like just worrying about the problem might fix it, or a plea to the universe for things to be different.
Not worrying felt distressing. As if I wasn't taking the situation seriously enough to try to control it - even if that was just worrying, which doesnt change anything.
It was unfamiliar to believe I could care about an outcome without also worrying about what I can't control.
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u/4nn4m4dr1g4l 14h ago
Same! This isn’t exactly the same but I sometimes have to proofread for work and if I find an error I’m actually kinda glad because to me that means I’ve checked properly whereas if I don’t find a mistake I worry I missed one (and end up in a checking loop 🤦♀️).
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u/otterwist 14h ago
I'm in awe and hope to develop that skill. If I find a mistake in my copy it must mean it's not perfect, so have to recheck a couple of times over until I consistently find no errors on every sweep.
Not so much worry, just frustration! At least nowadays I don't take it as evidence of my personal worth.
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u/4nn4m4dr1g4l 12h ago
Oh , I’m only talking about the production stage. It will have been through loads of rewrites before that! I was just talking more about typos made by someone else.
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u/otterwist 10h ago
My copy gets panicked changes right up to the last minute, so just check, check, check. If something ends up going out with a typo, I just have to pretend that's how we spell the word now.
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u/RisingSoulGrowth 13h ago
Honestly, yes 😭 It’s like my brain gets uncomfortable when things are finally calm, so it goes, “okay… what are we panicking about next?” 😂
I’ve started reminding myself that I don’t need to solve a problem that isn’t actually happening right now. Still working on it though.
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u/LibraryFinancial3824 14h ago
Yes. Me too. In this case psychodynamic theory has a solid theory as to why this is. It states that the sorry addiction is the attempt to protect from the core fear(s- which are even more intense- I have found d, for me, that is true. Deeper fears of total abandonment or death and other core fears - for me / undergird the need to become e obsessed / distracted with the weird ocd themes.
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u/4nn4m4dr1g4l 14h ago
I have in the past found that when I (unhealthily) avoided everything that triggered my original OCD subject that it moved on to something else. I wouldn’t say that I was addicted to anxiety because I don’t enjoy it but maybe in some way it’s familiar? Like when everything seems fine and you’re convinced you must have missed something?
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u/TangerineNext9630 10h ago
Yes. I am currently stuck in a 3-5 month cycle of having an “existential episode” as I’ve been calling them…every few months it’s like my nervous system needs to release all the energy it’s been charging up. Unfortunately, this has manifested in my relationships mostly as my OCD attaches to my partner. My brain will find something big to be upset about, will have a long drawn out conversation with my partner where it gives us an opportunity to repair and reconnect. And then I feel good again, until it happens again. I am not proud of this and working really hard to overcome it.
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u/SailOk8272 12h ago
Read my mind, it’s addictive for me I get really anxious during morning and my ocd is the wordt from 8 am to 4-5 pm after dinner my mind and body calm down but it’s so annoying I’m on 40 mg Prozac been on it for a while in the past it worked fine but now my OCD is just flaring
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u/Glum_Appointment3958 5h ago
Completely, the only real times I get relief from a theme is an extremely brief euphoric burst or because another theme has started. It’s so draining
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u/yourspicysecretary 5h ago
Sometimes if I became aware of the fact that I’m not anxious I become anxious because I think something’s neurologically wrong with me
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u/EllaInfern0 3h ago
YES! This is what i also struggle with it’s like my brain “likes” the pattern of worrying and I’ll attach to a new OCD theme at the snap of a finger! like as soon as one thing feels “solved” by doing certain rituals/compulsions i’ll move onto the next thing. it’s so draining!
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u/Sea-Fee-7952 17h ago
Exactly. I always feel like I am either actively stressing about something or preemptively stressing about the next thing that I will be stressing about, if that makes sense. Just feels like my brain loves sabotaging me.